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#1
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TW for some off the medical details, I think.
A little history... I had a duodenal ulcer back in 2003 from h. pylori. Since then I have taken prilosec daily. I also have a history, past and current, of internal hemorrhoids. Recently, the hemorrhoids have been causing problems, and I saw my GI doc earlier this month for that. This past week, I started having really bad upper abdominal pain that came and went with eating, and some back pain that I had been having for a few weeks seems to be linked to that as well. I went to after hours Saturday at the clinic my PCP is in, that doc did some blood work, and I got a call about 45 minutes later telling me to go to the ER. He wanted to be sure it wasn't my gallbladder or pancreas. Aside from low potassium and a high white blood cell count, everything looked okay. The ER doc put me on sucralfate, had me raise my prilosec dose, and did the "follow up with your GI doc" thing and sent me home. I saw my GI doc today, and I'm going for a colonoscopy and endoscopy on Friday. I haven't had an endoscopy since 2005 and I've never had a colonoscopy. I'm nervous to all hell and freaking out. I'm 34 years old, and I'm really just getting tired of my body seemingly giving out on me. I also have back issues, chronic pain, asthma, high blood pressure, borderline cholesterol issues, meniere's disease, and the mental illness. I have never really been healthy. When I get sick, I get SICK. Things that would last a few days to a week in someone else, take me 3 weeks at least to get over. I'm allergic to multiple drugs and have skin allergies, as well as environmental allergies. My list of medications, daily and PRN, is over 25 meds. I feel like I would be justified in just saying eff it, and giving up, and letting these health issues take over and just stop trying. How much is too much, you know...
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![]() Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
#2
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I can't help but feel for you. I also can't help but be curious about the side effects of these meds you are on. A lot of times people are over-prescribed, or prescribed a med to treat a side effect and not an actual disorder. I'm assuming a lot of this started in childhood? We're about the same age (I'm 36) so I can commiserate w/the feeling of your body giving up/betraying you. I stopped taking meds after almost 10 years of being on them and struggling with addiction, depression, anxiety, night terrors and sweats. Plus the pain. Some days, I want to curl in a ball and stay there, and debated whether to just take the effing flexeril and, like you said, "be done with it". Others? I'm so excited my children need me that the thought of being w/o them triggers a crying jag. I'm a wreck, too :-/ Just know that you're not alone.
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