[uglykidjoe]

I wrote something last week about my 4-year-old daughter's temper tantrums. Anyway, I also forgot to mention that she has been a victim of being bullied by some girl in her class. It all started back in December around the holidays. She kept saying this girl was pinching her, kicking her, etc. It was to the point where she was afraid to go to school At first I thought it would die down since the teachers kept writing this girl up and sending her to the office. Well low and behold. In January, this little brat bit my daughter on the face and she had to go to the nurse. Thank God she didn't have broken skin.

Anyway, I went ballistic at that school and they had to calm me down. Finally my mom and I had a meeting with the principal, the other girl's mom and the teacher. It stopped for a while, but it's starting back up again because my daugther told me recently that the girl pinched her and called her a *****. Also my daughter has been having accidents at school due to this. Every week, I have to bring in a change of clothes for her. I think this bully is scaring her so much that she's afraid to go to the bathroom so she does it on herself.

Could this also be why she's acting out as well? I need some answers right away. There has been too many victims being bullied at school. Does any other parent on here have a child that has been bullied?

[sorrel]

I'm an adult who was bullied as a child for many years. And, yes, anger and rage and severe anxiety can come from bullying.

I would say you have a right to say that either that girl gets moved to another classroom or your daughter does. That would be the first thing I would do at this point. It sounds like the teacher has been trying, the administration even sat down with the other parent, etc. This needs to end, and it may just be that physically separating the two is the only way. If this is a private school and there is only one class, I'd say they have cause enough to expel the other girl as a danger to other children.

And yes, this very well may be why your daughter is acting out.

[uglykidjoe]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

I would say you have a right to say that either that girl gets moved to another classroom or your daughter does. That would be the first thing I would do at this point. It sounds like the teacher has been trying, the administration even sat down with the other parent, etc. This needs to end, and it may just be that physically separating the two is the only way. If this is a private school and there is only one class, I'd say they have cause enough to expel the other girl as a danger to other children.

And yes, this very well may be why your daughter is acting out.

That's kind of what I was afraid to hear, but thanks for bringing this to my attention farmergirl. I figured that had something to do with why she has been having the biggest temper tantrums in public ever. She's been behaving in an unsual way lately. It just isn't normal. Especially wetting her pants.

Well I will just have to see what the principle says in the meeting tomorrow morning. They did discuss moving this bully to another class in the past. Hopefully they will come up with a solution. She has not only ben bullying my daughter, but also some other people in her class as well. This has got to stop. I will let you guys know the outcome. Thanks again for all of you responses.

[uglykidjoe]

Originally Posted by sorrel

I'm an adult who was bullied as a child for many years. And, yes, anger and rage and severe anxiety can come from bullying.

I'm so sorry to hear you had to go through that. Thanks for the info. Now I can get a better feel of why she's acting out like she's been doing lately.

[sun_flower]

Originally Posted by uglykidjoe

I wrote something last week about my 4-year-old daughter's temper tantrums. Anyway, I also forgot to mention that she has been a victim of being bullied by some girl in her class. It all started back in December around the holidays. She kept saying this girl was pinching her, kicking her, etc. It was to the point where she was afraid to go to school At first I thought it would die down since the teachers kept writing this girl up and sending her to the office. Well low and behold. In January, this little brat bit my daughter on the face and she had to go to the nurse. Thank God she didn't have broken skin.

Anyway, I went ballistic at that school and they had to calm me down. Finally my mom and I had a meeting with the principal, the other girl's mom and the teacher. It stopped for a while, but it's starting back up again because my daugther told me recently that the girl pinched her and called her a *****. Also my daughter has been having accidents at school due to this. Every week, I have to bring in a change of clothes for her. I think this bully is scaring her so much that she's afraid to go to the bathroom so she does it on herself.

Could this also be why she's acting out as well? I need some answers right away. There has been too many victims being bullied at school. Does any other parent on here have a child that has been bullied?

I remember being bullied in pre-school, all through school, and at my job.
It does leave lasting scars. Maybe that's why I have problems?

I hope that you can get things nipped in the bud. It's a real shame that little kid's bully and get bullied. I often wonder why people feel the need to do it.
It hurts.

I'm sorry that your little one is having to go through this.

[AAAAA]

When you have your meeting with the principal, be respectful, but FIRM. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Let him/her know you will NOT tolerate this type of assault being perpetrated on your child. If the principal is not helping, don’t be afraid to go up the ladder. If the child was older, I would suggest getting the police involved. There was a boy pinching my daughter and her friends on their breasts and butts in middle school. It was relatively dismissed until I notified the superintendent and boy’s parents that I’ve given all the girls instructions to call the police if this should happen again. This was sexual assault (something that is taken very seriously in this state) and if they were unwilling to deal with it, the proper authorities would.

Perhaps a suggestion that social service investigates why this other child is acting out is a good idea. But it is not your problem to find out why this other child is being so aggressive, but to protect your own child. It sounds like this bullying is having a profound impact on your daughter’s life.

[Evening]

I was abused at school-through primary school and highschool. To this day I haven't moved on from it, partly due to the added abuse at home. Please help her however you can because there are hierarchies that she will fall into as she gets older. The things that are happening now could seal her fate in the way she gets treated as she gets older. If it keeps happening over a period of time it could get worse and could end up involving more people. That is what happened to me. I had people I didn't even KNOW come up to me and say things that others were saying, it was humiliating. When I was about 6 a boy in art class came up to me and grabbed me around the throat and held a stanely knife in my face (although he was always adamant even 5 years later that it was tin foil, as I think yall be calling it in the US).
I always missed a lot of days at school too. I still have a diary from highschool and one year I had over 20 sick days because I was so sick, stressed and exhausted. I hated school.
Of course there WILL be a reason this girl is acting this way, whether it's because she is a little brat that is allowed by her parents to get away with things, or a medical reason.
Perhaps make an appointment with the principal and voice your concerns, this is not fair for her at all. It's affecting her confidence, her future and her education.

[~firefly~]

Her abnormal behavior is consistent with a child who is being abused, If at all possible I would relocate your daughter to a completely different school and you might want to call your local DHS and tell them the situation because its very possible that this other little girl is being abused at home and is acting it out on your child. Either way her actions need to be investigated.

[Gabi925]

My daughter was abused for almost three years in a school till she was kicked down by 7-8 boys on the schoolyard. she didn't tell me till I asked her why she is not washing faster her her hair... and I wanted to help her (she was 9) I wished she would have told me earlier.

I changed the school...(I prefer to do not comment) but the child has changed. In the same year she heard also her father by phone saying that he is not interested by her (actually at school she was saying "I have no father" even I was married and we lived together till she was 5) I do not know if because of being bullied (my daughter got a "nice" email too, two years later from other kid, from the gifted class were I moved her for a year, then moved again) ... or because of the other problem (she refuses to write anything at "father" on official forms, every year, even now, no matter she has his name)

I see a lot of anger crises (and manipulation over the normal one) and two years ago she was diagnosed ADHD later ODD... but till now she has no asocial behaviours; only at home is harder and harder to deal with her.

If you can, move the child now from that school and be ready to have a lot of patience for years.

[Claire89-2]

I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is being bullied at 4 or any age. There has been so much in the news recently about bullies and there is much more awareness and intolerance for it occurring. Be persistent. The bully doesn't have the right to inflict harm on another person. If she acts out and hurts others, she needs to be stopped. It's as simple as that. Don't worry about how many times you have to go to the school and talk with the principal. What about removing your daughter from that school? It sounds like she is suffering during the most important development (0-5) years of her life. It would not be in her best interest to be surrounded by that much trauma. I hope the issue can be resolved soon for your daughter's sake.

- Claire

Originally Posted by uglykidjoe

I wrote something last week about my 4-year-old daughter's temper tantrums. Anyway, I also forgot to mention that she has been a victim of being bullied by some girl in her class. It all started back in December around the holidays. She kept saying this girl was pinching her, kicking her, etc. It was to the point where she was afraid to go to school At first I thought it would die down since the teachers kept writing this girl up and sending her to the office. Well low and behold. In January, this little brat bit my daughter on the face and she had to go to the nurse. Thank God she didn't have broken skin.

Anyway, I went ballistic at that school and they had to calm me down. Finally my mom and I had a meeting with the principal, the other girl's mom and the teacher. It stopped for a while, but it's starting back up again because my daugther told me recently that the girl pinched her and called her a *****. Also my daughter has been having accidents at school due to this. Every week, I have to bring in a change of clothes for her. I think this bully is scaring her so much that she's afraid to go to the bathroom so she does it on herself.

Could this also be why she's acting out as well? I need some answers right away. There has been too many victims being bullied at school. Does any other parent on here have a child that has been bullied?

[NuckingFutz]

Oh, I forgot to give you some ammo...this is an actual crime in most states too. You might want to call the cops as well. Google bullying laws and you will get a ton of information to help you and your daughter. Can you keep us posted on this? Good luck!

[Gabi925]

Do not forget that the child is scared and is affected now. You might want to claim everywhere you think it might help - IN WRITTEN (ask friends for help if you are too affected now to do it) - starting with teacher and up on ladder higher than that school.

But do not forget to move the child NOW from that environment. A good school's staff and boar is priceless.

[Gabi925]

Do not forget that the child is scared and is affected now. You might want to claim everywhere you think it might help - IN WRITTEN (ask friends for help if you are too affected now to do it) - starting with teacher and up on ladder higher than that school.

But do not forget to move the child NOW from that environment. A good school's staff and board is priceless. My daughter was in such kind of school - a public school in Toronto - and I could see the difference.