My sweet girl thinking she is fat :(

My daughter is 9 yo and she has already come crying to me because she thinks she is fat, with the most recent on Thanksgiving. She was kind of pouting on the chair after we got home for the evening and she said she didn't like the way her stomach poked out and her calves looked fat.

She is by far from fat. She is perfect. Her stomach "poking out" is normal 9 yo stomach. She is perfect in my eyes and in a lot of others but I don't know how to make her realize that. First I told her absolutely she was not fat then I tried to make her realize that what matters most is how she feels on the inside. She is a good friend, a nice person, respectful (as far a 9yo can be lol), but she is just a good girl. I tried to get her to understand that the person she is and will be is way more important than how she looks on the outside.

I just don't know where this is coming from and it hurts my heart to see her be upset about that. Am I doing things right? Am I saying the right things to instill positive self esteem in her? She is my one and only

I feel, you are going through things, the right way. All you can do, is keep the lines of communication, open, between the two of you. Of course, it hurts, to hear your little one struggling. Well, she's 9, and when I used to babysit the neighbors daughter, before they moved out of state, I recall, that around that age, when she'd have a friend or two over, they'd come hang out at my place. My son and her, were also, classmates(he's going on 11, now). It's an age, of becoming more self aware and comparing themselves, to one another, as girls. I've boys, so, it was a little foreign to me, but she'd just started developing into womanhood, overnight(well, the very beginning stages of womanhood). So, I took notice. Boys are about a year or so behind.

Thank you

As far as she's told me (because I asked her) no one is calling her fat. I just don't know where her thinking is coming from because she is no bigger, no smaller than the other girls in her grade. So sad it starts so young

She is my baby girl and I just worry about her!

I'm glad, around here, they pulled the plug, on the bmi letters. The little girl, i used to watch, sounds similar, to your daughter, as with the belly, but was slender, all around. She was and still is, athletic and active. But, would have gotten, one, in the mail. Which is an outrage, which is why the letters stopped. Probably, from strong bones? I digress, her Mom is above average height, and I believe, the fuel/energy, whatever they call it medically, that is needed to grow, stores somewhere. It's, too bad, body consciousness, begins so early, even without girls making judging remarks, to one another. Just conscious, in differences.

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Show her how the pictures in magazines are distorted

See Why We Have An Absolutely Ridiculous Standard Of Beauty In Just 37 Seconds

I'm sorry your daughter thinks she is fat. Maybe show her a BMI scale and see which range she falls into.

It's the media. I agree with the above comment. It would be good to point out to her that models are photoshopped. You can find before and afters online to share with her if you think it would help. Also explain to her that her body will be completely different in a few years and she looks no fatter than anyone else her age.

It's the media. I hate it. You're doing the right thing. Hugs.

I know with me there was really no outside influence. There are tons of activities that can help. look at this and this

I like it! Thanks!!!!