Negative Balance

OMG I'm freaking out. My husband is a contractor and this time of year is very slow - worse bc of the weather. I went from a high paying job to SSDI in 2010, so we are barely have a dual income. I took a friend out for her bday Friday, and my debit card was declined - it was humiliating.

I feel so guilty because during a bad manic attack I bought a freaking house. So now my name is on 3 houses At this time we do not have tenants (we made the houses rentals) so it's been awful! My parents have helped us out in the past which really hurts my husbands ego I think.

So we are in the red with 3 mortgages to carry. To make matters worse my husband refinanced his house a few years ago, and I basically blew through $16K. I couldn't tell you what the hell I even spent the money on. I know we are blessed to have a roof over our heads - or make that 3 roofs But this is awful. Our furnance went out last year, and we don't have the money to replace it. So, we are using 2 space heaters! There is ice on the inside of our windows, and we are wearing hats and gloves. I am just so flipping stressed and feel like this is all my fault. I want to get a PT job, but it is really hard with the bipolar etc. My husband has no health insurance and he smokes. God forbid if anything happened to him, and his job is not exactly safe. Then I have a broken crown and other messed up molars. My dentist made up a tally of the work I need done and it's $7K hahahah. That's all I can say at that.

I'm sorry if I'm offending anyone who is unemployed or trying to get on disability. I know there are many who are worse off than we are. l

Sorry for the long post, and thanks for letting me vent.

tnt

Can you donate the two other houses to charity just to get out of the mortgages so you don't have to be stressed at trying to pay those mortgages, maybe your husband can sweeten the deal a bit with being willing to donate some time in the Spring to help fix them up? I'm so sorry you are so stressed and, it sounds like, extremely uncomfortable (I hate cold!).

Sorry you were embarrassed in front of your friend but I'm sure she understood. Is there any way you could put one or two of the houses on the market and try to sell them? Those manic moments can be a ******. Sorry yours turned out so expensive. Hope you make it through until the weather is better.

Can you move a heater from one of the other places? Sounds like you could declare bankruptcy? Nobody wants to do that but it might take some of the burden off. Your husband ought to be able to get subsidies on Obama Care. You can look before you buy.

It's hard to think of things to do to when you are stressing over things like heat. There are orgs out there that can help sort it out.

Thank you all so much for the help and replies. We can't really move a heater as they are fitted to each individual house but that was a great idea. I've never thought about donating to charity! My husband owns his own business and refuses to file bankruptcy. I think he is afraid it would hurt is reputation and people would really low ball and refute his estimates. We are putting one house, that is upside down, on the market. My Mom said they would gift us the furnace that needs replacing, but when my Dad heard that he said we have to make a profit on the sale and repay them. I don't really blame him as I'm an adult and they shouldn't feel the need to support me. But damn the furnace estimate was $4K!!! We have to have it replaced or the house can't go on the market. The other house rents at a profit, so I'm taking about half of my SSDI to make the mortgage payment. Either way if we sell or rent the 2nd house it will need to be fixed up.

I'm very resentful at my husband right now. He knew our joint acct was in the red and decided to spend $38 on flipping vitamins WHF?! He continues to buy his cigarettes one pack at a time at the most expensive gas station. I told him a hundred times to buy a carton at the discount tobacco store which is what I did before I quit. It would literally save about $100 a month. He also still buys booze about once a week. Also, he keeps driving my car until I went from a full tank to less that 1/4.

So, I'm taking a stand. I've paid up my mortgage and bills and have about $80 for the rest of the month. I refuse to buy any groceries, normally I pay for them each month and almost all are for dinners I cook my husband. He is picky about left overs, complains if he has to eat the same thing 2 days in a row, and won't eat anything made in a crockpot. Basically, I am a short order cook. Before I got married I usually ate soup and cereal so that's what the hell I'm going to eat. If he has a problem with it he's SOL!!

Thanks again so much for letting me vent and for the helpful replies!

Love & Light,

tnt