[ATJC]

Oh, where to even begin. I suppose it started during the time of my life where I was so unhappy about everything I was I just wanted to be someone else, so I invented a persona that was everything I wanted to be, and that persona just so happened to be female. In a way I always identified with females, some of my favorite heroes growing up were Sailor Moon, Buffy and Xena. I even like Supergirl more than I do Superman. I always found women easier to write for than men too and more interesting so it just made sense at the time.

I eventually came clean feeling guilty and made my biological gender more publicly known but I stuck with the name I had chosen for the woman. Still use that alias to this day as I've come to like it and when I tend to use more of a male alias I feel uncomfortable like I'm out of my skin. Although I usually either put 'male' or 'undisclosed' in my gender profile I don't mind being addressed as she or her nor do I go out of my way to correct people when they say it. I always use women to represent me as well be it an avatar like here or when I'm playing a simple RPG I always play as a woman representation of me. I've even been told I write like a woman, whatever that means. According to one person I spoke with it's because I use proper punctuation which is apparently signs of a woman or a European. Interesting that...

Lately I've been having the urge to find a place where no one knows me and put 'female' in my profile so people would interact with me as they generally would with a woman. Which is ultimately what led me here... I'm starting to wonder if I'm transgender. I identify more with women, I tend to get along with them more than with other men and heck I even find some men attractive. Thing is, I'm not disgusted by my body or anything about my default male persona and I don't get mad when someone addresses me as he or him. I'm generally comfortable with my body for the most part which leads me to doubt since I've seen several transgender comment over the years about how they don't like their physical body and the one transgender friend I talk to regularly have said similar things. I just always picture myself as the girl. A redheaded girl with emerald green eyes which is oddly specific...

So, yeah, some insight if you could provide it would be most appreciative. If you're still reading this then thank you.

[Confusedinomicon]

You're probably under the umbrella of "genderqueer"

Genderqueer - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I think you also fall under trans*. I don't think you necessarily need to feel body dysphoria because you mentally feel and picture yourself as a girl. Everyone has different levels of dysphoria and yours happens to touch on how you express yourself through your mind. If you switch between the male and female persona you could be considered "bigender"

Bigender - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Bigender is still considered a subset of transgender/genderqueer.

[ringtailcat]

If you really feel you have to have a label, I tend to lean toward what Confusedinomicon said about being genderqueer.

But then I might feel that way because I consider myself to be genderqueer....

[Rand.]

Just to throw this out there also, have you considerd you might be a feminine guy who likes the company of females? Nothing wrong with that either =) It's something only you can know for sure and it can be a journey.

Perhaps you already know this, but I'd like to start out by saying that there is a difference between being "transgender" & "transsexual". If you are transsexual then you are transgender. But if you're transgender, that doesn't necessarily mean you're transsexual. You could be any one of a number of other things, some of which are talked about in other posts above.

Being transsexual basically means "feeling like" or "believing yourself to be" the opposite sex from the one you were born as. So you could be biologically male but "feel" female inside, or vice versa. And also, this is not an all or nothing thing, as many people (even trans people) assume. There is a continuum of transsexuality which runs from mild to, I'll say "thorough" (for lack of a better term.) And the impact of where a particular person falls on this continuum is different for genetic males & females. BTW, it is believed that about the same number of biological males & biological females are transsexual. However, being transsexual can be harder on biological males because it is socially more acceptable for females to adopt male attributes that it is for males to adopt female attributes.

It's also important to understand there is a difference between gender identity and sexual orientation. Gender identity is what you feel yourself to be: either male or female. Sexual orientation relates to which sex you're attracted to. Which sex you're attracted to does not necessarily say anything about your gender identity.

And one other point while I'm on the subject... if you're really transsexual... it does not go away. You won't get over it. If you're trans, you're trans for life. And so the sooner you figure this all out, the better. This doesn't necessarily mean that you have to do anything specific about it right away. You want to take it at whatever pace feels comfortable for you, once you've figured out what it is you need to do. But you do need to begin to address the issue. And to do this you need a competent therapist who is experienced in working with clients who are transgendered. A therapist who is not can do more harm than good.