Please help?

Not sure where to put this so apologies if it's actually in the wrong category...

Ever since I can remember I've not been the greatest fan of dresses and more "girly" attire/attributes. Apparently I played in dungarees, climbed up trees and played with trucks as a child.

Even at nearly 22 I still am not into dresses or heels. And when I say this, I don't mean I have a hatred of them lol, I mean I just don't like or feel myself in them. I've been encouraged/pushed into wearing more "feminine/girly" attire by family members, ever since i was a teen, so I wear them sometimes but don't feel "me" or "right" still :/

I don't like how the media tends to portray straight women as having long thick perfect hair, beautiful (or at least nicely proportioned) faces, perfectly straight white teeth, big breasts, killer curves, tall or short statures, and either slim or curvy in all the right places. And then gay women as having short hair, being sexually aggressive and having tattoos and/or piercings...

I feel all it does is give women and men the wrong impression of straight females as a whole...we're NOT all like that, we Don't all have curves in the right places or big breasts...

I really do get confused sometimes because I don't like dresses or heels even though I'm definitely a woman. I've experienced this confusion before as a teenager when I became naturally more conscious of my appearance (as a child, most of us aren't aware of our beauty, of lack of) and it ended up me feeling gender dysphoric and thinking I was even born in the wrong body. I'm not sure if this is still the case for me now though however as I don't think about my "gender" as much at my age...

I'm not beautiful or even average like the women I know personally, see on sites, and just out and about in real life. Maybe this fact/belief makes me feel more "like a bloke" because the way I want to look isn't the reality. I don't look necessarily like a man (however seeing as I take after my father....hmmmm! lol) but I do look different :/

I hope this will be taken seriously...

Welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry you are feeling like a victim of the stereotypical images society supports of women. It should not be that way.

I am so sorry you are struggling with these issues. It sounds like you have some challenges so a therapist specializing in transgender issues or women's identity issues would be a good addition to the support team.

Since I joined PC I have been able to share more and developed more trust. Besides being an active participant in helping oneself at Psych Cental, many people also help support each other by replying to other people's posts. Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems are more manageable the more they help others.

Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

Androgynous is a word that comes to my mind. It can be a beautiful quality in and of itself.

Welcome to PC

I hope you find the support that you need here.

I am 56 and still like that. I joke that the only time I was appropriately dressed was at my wedding. That was 23 years ago. I prefer jeans, t-shirts and sneakers. I have been this way since I was about 4. I once had a T who tried to turn me into a feminine woman. She used to tell me that guys don't like girls like me. She was WRONG! She just screwed me up more. You are who you are. I know my husband loves me for me. I always preferred sports to shopping. Try not to be concerned. We all aren't the same. Life is much easier when we are comfortable in our skin.

Hello and welcome to Psych Central MissLaurenLeexo!!! It's nice to meet you. You have joined a community of warm and caring members who will want to offer you support and advice. Yours is welcome as well.

Please feel free to contact any community liaison or moderator by left clicking on their name in blue to the left of their post if you need help navigating the forums. It will take some time for your first five posts to appear as they are being evaluated and then you will be able to join chats.

I'm sorry for your struggles. You are perfect just the way you are!!! We have all kinds of women in this world. No need to plug yourself into a category. Just be you. You'll find we have a safe and supportive community. I'm glad you've joined us.

I look forward to seeing you around!!!

There is no way that a woman (or better yet person) should look. You should dress and act in a way that is the most comfortable for you. Sure when you meet someone new they might make some incorrect assumptions about you, but anyone worth getting to know, will also get to know you, the real you.

I'm a straight male who is WAY too in touch with his feminine side, lived for years trying to hide this, feeling ashamed about it (my ex was great at making me feel bad about myself) but now that I'm divorced I have become much more comfort with who I am. If I meet someone and they assume I'm gay, why should I care, I don't worry about what narrow minded people think. And just because someone might get the wrong first impression, if they are at all open minded and at all interested in getting to know me then they will soon figure things out.

So be yourself, be forgiving of good people making incorrect assumptions when they first meet you, and don't let the narrow minded few change how you choose to live your life.