[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

So a long time ago (about 12 years) I was diagnosed with OCD. At the same time though I was diagnosed bipolar DID and BPD as well so I ignored the OCD, BD and BPD, thinking that was far from who I am.
I'm back in therapy now and my drs are certain I have OCD, without a doubt, I guess it got bad this year because even I can see it slightly.
I went through an agorophobic stage this past year, it was bad, and during that time I started to notice some things about me that mAy now be so "normal" after all.(please don't take offense to the normal, of course OCD people are normal as well)
I noticed things like my overwhelming obsessive thoughts, repeating thoughts and I obsess constantly, I want to stop thinking about these things but the thoughts keep pushing back in.
I have a lot of things that make me feel more comfortable. I didn't recognize it as anything different until my t said it wasnt so common.
I k ow everyone is cautious when cooking raw chicken but my kitchen is a circus when I'm cooking chicken. I have to run the water the whole time so I don't have to touch the knobs, any time I touch anything that may have had raw chicken on it I wash my hands, the hand washing is where it gets unusual. I clean the kitchen after the cooking but the whole time I cook and clean the raw chicken I'm running to the kitchen to wash my hands. When I do this though I wash my hands, then grab the dish soap I just used to wash my hands, I place the soap in the sink where I proceed to wash my hands again , but this time when I'm done washing my hands I wash the bottle of dish soap too, then I wash my hands one more time. For a while I was washing, hands bottle hands bottle hands bottle on and on but eventually I decided hands bottle hands would be sufficient.
For the last two weeks my apartment has been spotless and I've been working on lining and centering things, I can't tell you how many times I walk by and adjust the picture frames to straighten and line them up, eventually I pulled out measuring tape. I've been moving furniture to straighten it out, organizing everything...
Now I'm not always like this at all, picking specks off the floor all day, constantly sweeping, scrubbing walls, organizing, straightening... It's only happened a couple times before.
It started when my father in law was supposed to come over to drop off a dresser. I cleaned all day then his arrival got pushed back a day, I was happy with that it gave me time to clean some more.
Then it got pushed back four days. During those four days I kept seeing things that needed to be cleaned, base boards, light switches, dusting, carpet. I got on my hands and knees and scrubbed the carpets with a soft bristle brush. When his parents got here the house was spotless. When they left I still got the annoying nagging "that frame isn't straight... That painting needs to be moved over a couple centimeters" thoughts and continuously clean still. I literally spend 8 hours a day every day cleaning my apartment, not including the hour before bed doing dishes, laundry, any time a piece of laundry ends up in one of the many baskets we have, I take them to the laundry room.
The cleaning isn't alwAys there, it comes in phases like everything else. I get these nagging thoughts until eventually a new nagging thought pops in and a new obsession takes over. I learned long ago I can't watch the news or politics, I go into a depressing obsession when I do that.
I have the skin picking too, so bad I do it in my sleep and have a lot of scars. I used to pull my hair out (never ate it though) but stopped years ago, now I only tug on my hair when I'm overwhelmed.
So enough about me, I was hoping someone could share their experience, do you have phases of obsessions too or do they pretty much stay the same? What are the thoughts like, do you have any "rituals", and is anyone else a slob when not in a cleaning phase? Any info on OCD or shared experiences? I don't know of anyone that I know that has OCD, what's it like for you?

[Phobicperson]

For me, my compulsions happen at night. Every night. And when I go outside with a bag (I'm a checker). For info about OCD, just do an Internet search. There's plenty of info somewhere. I have phases for some things, one period extremely intense then slowly (after months) get less cause I've already done everything. My room's messy but everything has its place. My nightly ritual is repetitive and short, basically look left, look right, repeat, tap 3 times. There's plenty of videos on YouTube about people sharing their experiences. Hope this helped

[Phobicperson]

Oh and I pick at the skin of my thumbs as well. Mostly.

[ocdwifeofsociopath]

I have a lot of washing issues while cooking too . In the shower I wash the top layer off my soap before using it on my skin. I do a lot of thought obsessing. I re-play conversations or sections of them in my head for great lengths of time. I pick my skin a lot. Sensations on me have to be even. There are certain noises I Can't stand. And I am terrified of my face in water without plugging my nose and having control. Even in the shower. That's some of my issues. There are lots and lots more.

[WorkInProgress16]

My compulsions and obsessions change on which ones are more important. Sometimes it's my number compulsion, sometimes it's cleanliness and organization. I always have some OCD issues with food. I replay a lot of conversations in my head and scenarios because I want to perfect them. I tend to pick at bumps on my skin, whether its a rash, acne, or bug bites.

[spondiferous]

- I get intrusive thoughts that won't go away: me harming myself and others, children and animals, doing disgusting things, seeing, smelling, tasting disgusting things, hearing things that shake me to the core.
- When I get an idea in my head I can't let go of it. Example: the last few months I've decided that it's time to start thinking about going back to college. So I have been spending that entire time researching colleges and universities (not just in my city but all over Canada), planning out ENTIRE degrees for multiple programs (because I can't figure out what to take), and applying and then changing my mind so wasting money on application fees. A few days ago I had another agoraphobic episode that made me realize that expecting to do school in public was likely unrealistic (given all the other things I deal with as well) so now the last two days I've been researching online programs. It just doesn't quit.
- perfectionism. There is no such thing as 'too perfect' and I spend basically half my time feeling like I'm losing my mind because everything just unravels when I start to think about it because I can always 'break it down' in my mind even further. Until there is nothing. And then it appears to me that nothing exists and I start freaking out and can't escape. Also in this category: I was raised by an undiagnosed OCD father, and there was always a 'right way' to do things, right down to how many squares of toilet paper to use, and how to fold the dishcloth, etc. So I have internalized these things (not all came from him, a lot of it is just things I've 'perfected' in my own life) and I have a really hard time with my partner 'cutting corners'. She does the dishes and always forgets any dishes on the stove and never wipes the surfaces in the kitchen. I have to fix it. I can't just leave it like that.
- counting. I count specks on the ceiling, lines on the road, I really am not going to list the things I count. I count everything. And I make up songs and rhythms in my head to keep track of how many there are (I have several tried and true ones that I've been using since about the age of 6).
- disorganization: I cannot leave the house if the bed is unmade. Open cupboards freak me out. I can't relax in a cluttered room. I can't just 'let things go', ie. my partner always leaves her clothes on the floor on her side of the bed. It gives me so much anxiety.
- I don't do lightswitch-flipping or handwashing but I have other things: I can't step on cracks. I have to cross them, and thresholds, and land on the bottom step of a flight of stairs with my right foot. I have to snap my fingers a certain number of times before I go to the bathroom and if there are magazines in there with people on them I have to hide their faces so they're not looking at me.
- when one part of my body gets itchy I will suddenly be itchy all over, sometimes for an hour straight.
- I am obsessed with picking at the skin around my nails and toenails.

I'm sure I'm forgetting some. It's different with everyone.

[neutrino]

I suspect I have a quite mild case of OCD because I don't get that anxious if I don't carry out my compulsions. For me it's more about a feeling. It just doesn't feel right when I don't do it. It's like an itch I need to scratch and I can't really focus until I've done so. Examples of compulsions:

1. I arrange and organise things. I put things in the "right" angles until they look right.
2. I even things out, touch things the same amount of times and/or with the same amount of pressure, avoid stepping on things I've categorised as "uneven" etc. Examples of things I've categorised as uneven: certain cracks in the sidewalk, things breaking the "normal pattern" on the street, thresholds, certain stones and leaves on the ground etc.
3. I count steps and certain things I do.
4. I read and reread things and I write and rewrite things over and over again to avoid mistakes or because what I've read or written doesn't feel right the first time.
5. Perfectionism.
6. I check and recheck certain things before I go to bed and before leaving the house to avoid accidents.
7. Not sure if this is a compulsion or a tic (if you know the answer please let me know) but I sometimes get a weird feeling in my fingers which I can only get rid of by pressing my fingers against for example my desk. I get the same feeling in/on my nose which I can only get rid of by pressing my nose against my upper lip and hold it there for a little while.

Things like that.

[WorkInProgress16]

I get this weird urge to repetitively tap a spot on my chest. I also have perfectionism issues.

[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

Thank you all for your replies, I have a lot of the same things as others have listed so I do see the OCD.
It was horrible after I started getting unexplained seizures and then diagnosed with epilepsy at 25, can you imagine the obsessions that took over? If I don't get eight hours of sleep I'm freaking out all day, if I don't do things a certain way I'm freaking out, the obsession part really kicked my butt with the epilepsy until my obsessions started to eventually change.
I do the crack thing, I can't step on any cracks when I'm walking, I played poker with family last night and everyone noticed the OCD and called me out on it (these are inlaws) because I color coordinated my chips (the chips were all worth the same amount so color coordinating didn't matter), stacked them in piles evenly organized and went out of my way to throw out the chips that didn't add up, keeping the green ones till last and trying to get rid of the blue ones ASAP. I think they already knew about the OCD but my husbands cousin was there who we never see and be called me out on it.
It just makes me feel more comfortable. I've also of course got a very unlucky number (666) and go out of my way to avoid that number as much as possible, when I get change back from the store if its $6.66 I will leave some of the money there with the receipt or buy something else or put something back, when the speedometer gets close to 66.6 miles on the car I have to reset it, if I don't I get so easy, often causing me to pull to the side of the road to calm down.
I just figured these were things I did to be comfortable, they relax me.