I have been dealing with OCD for life.

I am 27 I am a bodybuilder even though I seriously lack motivation (if that makes any sense). I don't even know where to start, I have so many questions. I had visited a few psychologists because I refuse to take meds. I also have been reading deeply into free will, and if we actually have it or not. I have social anxiety (walk in public with hands in my pockets or holding my phone or keys). I have a very high sex drive as well, it's hard to stay loyal in relationships, but not impossible. I feel I am doomed to life, I have made money through ads on the Internet for quite some time now, I just started college recently because while I'm making money im not making enough. I see everyone else improving and buying houses and cars etc, and im just stuck in the muck because I let my anxiety control my life. I feel so lazy, it's hard to be motivated and I blame my parents for that. They cleaned up and did a lot for me(not a bad thing), they were great parents as well. But they didn't push me enough to do stuff as a child so I kind of think that im screwed, this is genetic and I'll always be like this because Nothing has changed so far. I am in love with this woman I am with, she's older than me by 10 years. I am scared if I don't do something soon then I will lose her and eventually end up alone for the rest of my life because of my fear of public and to work in public. I have worked in public before but I always quit because I just do not like it. I would be more
Comfortable working labor. I feel I cannot help this as free will doesn't exist and I am responsible for my past actions which has made me the person I have become. I guess I just want some people to talk to about. I don't want to take medication because I have a lively happy personality that I don't want to lose. I've seen it change people and sadly, mostly for the worst. I have a dream, I love bodybuilding. I have a very gifted aesthetic physique I want to pursue a career in fitness, however I lack motivation and sometimes I get really motivated about stuff and then after a few days I just fall off with it. Sorry if my punctuation is off its 4am.

hi alwaysanxiety
i was against meds with a passion and i suffered and wasted away thirty years of my life. i had a lot more than anxiety going on. but i finally broke down and started taking them. while it is true some meds change people there are many that do not. i am intelligent, i value my mind over everything. i refused to let it be numbed out on meds or have myself dulled down at all. i refused any med that changed me at all. drs werent thrilled that they had to change my meds so much but they work for me, i have the right to decide what i want to take. i take buspar for my anxiety and it works wonderfully with zero side effects. enough about meds.

to be successful at a goal, it may help to break it down into smaller steps that are more achievable for you. it helps if they are very specific. rather than i want to be a body builder which is really general, you could think of the steps it takes to get to that goal and focus on those instead. say, i want to make it to the gym for an hour a day and lift weights.

welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome

Just a thought, what about a life coach?

Welcome to PC!

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Idk man, I would rather try something natural like 5-htp or St. John's wort. I was referred to a medication called Effexor or Paxil. These scare me because of their terrible side effects such as a low sex drive. I hear a lot of people have suffered impotence and never return to normal. If I am the Unlucky 2.5 million people in the US who suffer with OCD, my luck I'll probably experience the worst of sides. I would rather be crazy in the head and have a functioning sex drive than take something to calm me and make me have no libido. I just hope there's other alternatives to medication.

I have been researching meds such as Seroquel and Remeron being successful treatments for OCD, with low incidences of loss of libido.

Welcome!!!!!!!!!!

Have you been coached through the EBT of exposure and response prevention and desensitization therapies?

I want to try this. Before medication, I just feel like it's not gonna work. But I shouldn't doubt

Hi AlwaysAnxiety...
Are you currently taking any supplements? I do believe that a healthy diet and the right vitamins and minerals help our general sense of wellness and health a lot. Although I can't say much because I self-medicate with alcohol but am studying to become a nutritionist (makes sense? yea, didn't think so).
I sorta understand what you mean about the motivation....I am the same way. I love the gym and anything fitness related...but have a hard time 'staying on the wagon' if you will.
Have you spoken to a counsellor about how you are feeling?
There is a good book I would recommend about mental health and taking natural supplements (as you said you would prefer this over meds) called: "New Optimum Nutrition for the Mind" by Patrick Holford...worth giving it a read, maybe.

Anyways...welcome. I am new here too....but felt compelled to write. Take care.

Hello, sorry about that. I wasn't getting any notifications! I started taking 200-400mg SAM-e and this honestly has lightened my mood. It has made social anxiety go down a bit. I still have my ocd thoughts though. But when I take the sam-e, I don't get the 'sad' feeling that would usually come on out of nowhere. I read self help books and I am forcing myself to do stuff that would usually bother me so I can learn to ignore it. I have read and heard from a lot of people that the EBT exposure and reaponse works for greater than 50% of people with the worst ocd. I don't need an anti depressant. IM NOT DEPRESSED. I just lack motivation and have mood swings sometimes. I believe im more manic than OCD, but definitely a mix. Whenever I force myself to go out and do something I feel great! I usually just get down and sad when I sit inside and do nothing but think. But the sam-e makes a difference for sure! Can anyone else elaborate on this supplement?

Speaking of B vitamins, ever since I have been taking a super b complex with fish oils and a lot of vitamin C, I have been generally feeling better. I will continue to do this for the rest of my life, I have read quite a few studies showing that individuals with OCD, are often B vitamin deficient. I also take magnesium!