[vacantangel]

This apology is in response to my comments in wants2fly's thread.

I'm sorry:

1. for making assumption's about wants2's motives and questioning them.

2. for not asking wants2 via PM what her motives were instead of posting

3. for causing hurt/anger/grief/stress to wants2 for the things I posted

4. for putting doubts in anybody's mind as to what her motives were/are

5. for upsetting both the General and Self-Esteem forums and to Psych Central

6. for upsetting/angering anybody else who feels affected by my actions

I think I'll just read for awhile instead of doing any posting since I've ruffled way too many feathers.

I hope at some point y'all can forgive me and also that we can put this all behind us and move on and get back to supporting each other, which is the reason we all came here to begin with.

((((((((((((( wants2fly)))))))))))) I'm really sorry sweetie.

((((((((((((( Psych Central ))))))))))

[sometimes]

no i truly agree that someone could take offense to it. i was thinking that as i read it. you've done nothing wrong. personally i didn't find it that funny. so don't worry about it

cheerio

[Kathyanita]

Angel-
Because of your reply in the threads we've all participated in sorting out our own feelings and motives- what could be wrong with that? And because of the original post I have been posting more and taking part- even though my comments were philisophical and not seen as relevent and was at least verbal and coherent in formulating my thoughts-
so again nothing bad about that. Its what goes on in live support groups too- nothing earth-shaking, just a fair exchange of feelings where it doesnt appear to have caused anyone any harm here. Everybody allows each other to be vocal because our experiences in life were probably all suffered in silence and we werent allowed to protest and disagree and think our own thoughts. We're all chomping at the bit now to be expressive and so I thank the whole community and especially wantsto and angel for opening a dialogue and still containing themselves enough to let the talk proceed. I think we've all shown much maturity in how this was handled.

You are so very right kathy. Well said. Angel, I see no reason to apologize. Granted, I'm not wants2, but I think that everyone handled that thread very well. I hope to see you posting again very soon. Take care sweetie.

Ry

[kimmydawn]

AG, you did good it's understandable that you were already feeling defensive for someone and one spark started another for you. you were being a good friend to someone. i'm glad you no longer feel that need and all is well

kd

[January]

Angel,

Sometimes things just triggers us. No one means any harm at all but the most innocuous things just sets us off.

The thread brought a lot of thought filled comments and it was a learning experience by all.

Wants2 is an awsome person and you are, too.

January

[Wants2Fly]

I thank AngelGirl for her apology, and I have PM'ed her with an explanation of why I did not initially respond to her attempts to initiate dialogue. I regret that my silence caused concern. I am not, and have not been angry with AngelGirl. I agree with those who believe that a lively, provocative dialogue resulted and that civility was observed.

Thank you for supporting AngelGirl in expressing herself.

Dialogue is the building block of understanding, and understanding is the foundation of democracy.

[jmo531]

(((((ANGELGIRL)))))

Poop happens. You expressed your feelings. Your feelings are never wrong, wether they ruffle feathers or not. Don't be so hard on yourself.

Love,

Jen

[jmo531]

I also wanted to add that I know the thread that is being referred to.
I believe that Wants2 was only expressing her feelings as well. There is nothing wrong with that. Feelings are wrong I will say again. No matter who is expressing them.
Love to Angelgirl
Love to Wants2

You both are a very important part of this forum. I think very highly of the both of you and look to you for advice when I need it (which is very often) LOL.

Take care both of you. Lets sweep this under the rug....
Shall we

[jmo531]

As you can see i can't spell either. I meant to say FEELING ARE NOT WRONG. GEESH!!!!

Im going to bed

[jmo531]

NEVERMIND!!!! You get it.

[vacantangel]

Thanks to all of you who have expressed your feelings here. I certainly wasn't looking for any support to my actions whatsoever. This was merely an apology for wants2 but done in a public way so that others could also read it. I thank y'all for your understanding and support. Greatly appreciated.

wants2 - As I told you in PM, you are a wonderful and gracious person to accept my apology so quickly and willing after the comments that I made. It is not everyone who would be able to do that. I was very pleasantly surprised to receive the warmness of your words. To be honest, certainly not what I was expecting. That is not a comment regarding your personal character but moreso to my past experiences of my continual screw-ups where the other person would reject me at this point and walk away from the friendship that had previously formed, regardless of the length of time it had been for. It is refreshing to see that there are people like you, who are far more empathetic, compassionate and understanding. I've always liked you and that never changed even with the things that I had said in your thread. You've always been very supportive of me and I've tried to be there for you as well and will continue to do so. You have shown me that you are a lady of great class, who can see the situation for what it was on my part, where I was separating the actions from the person, not something that some find easy to do. I'm glad that you are not rejecting me for that would certainly be my loss. I have learned through this process that I need to stop jumping to conclusions about things that people say and/or do and not form my own opinions as to what the meaning of them is because I see only through the eyes of my very distorted negative thinking. That's why I'm participating in a CBT group therapy now 'Mind Over Mood'. Hopefully, I will find some success in this group setting that I was unable to find when I did it before in individual therapy awhile back. Of course, I am not perfect, and I will probably screw up a time or two but I sure hope for the better part to ask the other person what their motives are / what was meant by their words, etc before arriving at my own often distorted conclusions. So, at least there was a lesson learned for me in all of this.

Again, I want to thank you for your being able to see what my perspective was and your graciousness in being able to accept my apology so quickly and not being angered by what I had done. You're a good person and I'm glad that I have the opportunity to get to know you better and to continue to offer you support when you need it. You're certainly a cut above the rest in my past who went running for the hills. You'll never know how much that means to me to get a 2nd chance. I shall not let you down. Luv ya sweetie and always did and I'm glad that you could see that regardless of what my actions were.



Now, I'll read your 10 reasons list and see where they most apply to me. I'm sure I personally have a lot to work on.

Luv ya, you're one in a million!!!

[vacantangel]

Thanks to all of you who have expressed your feelings here. I certainly wasn't looking for or even expecting any support to my actions whatsoever. This was merely an apology for wants2 but done in a public way so that others could also read it. I thank y'all for your understanding and support. Greatly appreciated.

wants2 - As I told you in PM, you are a wonderful and gracious person to accept my apology so quickly and willing after the comments that I made. It is not everyone who would be able to do that. I was very pleasantly surprised to receive the warmness of your words. To be honest, certainly not what I was expecting. That is not a comment regarding your personal character but moreso to my past experiences of my continual screw-ups where the other person would reject me at this point and walk away from the friendship that had previously formed, regardless of the length of time it had been for. It's happened to me more times than I care to think about. It is refreshing to see that there are people like you, who are far more empathetic, compassionate and understanding. I've always liked you and that never changed even with the things that I had said in your thread. You've always been very supportive of me and I've tried to be there for you as well and will continue to do so. You have shown me that you are a lady of great class, who can see the situation for what it was on my part, where I was separating the actions from the person, not something that some find easy to do. I'm glad that you are not rejecting me for that would certainly be my loss.

I have learned through this process that I need to stop jumping to conclusions about things that people say and/or do and not form my own opinions as to what the meaning of them is because I see only through the eyes of my very distorted negative thinking. That's why I'm participating in a CBT group therapy now 'Mind Over Mood'. Hopefully, I will find some success in this group setting that I was unable to find when I did it before in individual therapy awhile back. Of course, I am not perfect, and I will probably screw up a time or two but I sure hope for the better part to ask the other person what their motives are / what was meant by their words, etc before arriving at my own often distorted conclusions. So, at least there was a lesson learned for me in all of this. So something positive came out of it.

Again, I want to thank you for your being able to see what my perspective was and your graciousness in being able to accept my apology so quickly and not being angered by what I had done. You're a good person and I'm glad that I have the opportunity to get to know you better and to continue to offer you support when you need it. You're certainly a cut above the rest in my past who went running for the hills. For once, I'm not being abandoned. You'll never know how much that means to me to get a 2nd chance. I shall not let you down. Luv ya sweetie and always did and I'm glad that you could see that regardless of what my actions were. You too were able to separate the deed from the doer.



Now, I'll read your 10 reasons list and see where they most apply to me. I'm sure I personally have a lot to work on.

Luv ya, you're one in a million!!!