[NuckingFutz]

I am trying to adjust to life on a limited income. I am applying for social security as well as VA benefits as I cannot work. I am already on foodstamps as well as Section 8 Housing.

What I have noticed over the past three years as I've started to received social services (healthcare, mental healthcare, housing, and foodstamps) is that dealing with people is more difficult. The people around me are so different than the people than I grew up with and have worked with. It's not just in a certain place either...when I go to the foodstamp office (I do my interview by phone now), I use to have to put up with a crowded office with children running around unattended and making so much noise that I had to step outside from getting anxious. This happens in spite of the security guard in the waiting room and the signs in English and Spanish advising adults not to let their children run around unattended and make noise.

I had a problem with my mental health care provider not giving me proper instructions with my meds and advising me of contraindications, thank the powers that be that I am not eligible to receive mental health care from my state goverment sponsored community health clinic (it took them 10 years by the way, for them to figure out that I'm not eligible to receive services from them). And thank the powers that be that I was eligible to receive mental health care AND regular health care from the VA (this part I can deal with).

Now the living situation...now that's hairy. I stay away from the obvious run down, criminal looking element places. I've lived in 3 different places on section 8. The first place was a coop recommended by the local community mental health center. At this place, I learned a few things...I learned with crack looked like, smelled like, and all the different things people do on it (sex, steal, lie, cheat, screw eachother over...repeatedly). Told the mental health place what was going on...not until a resident attempted to beat up a cop did they do anything...then they shut the whole thing down. The second place I lived in actually passed inspection...it shouldn't have...the landlord was crazier than I was...I was outta there within a year. Now this place I'm living in...in a nice, quaint neighbor hood, well built (well, except for the fact that it has no insulation) and the management company borders on negligent (hope their insurance is up to date). Not until I moved in did I find out that the last resident no longer lives there as a result of a crack overdose mixed with alcohol...2 other people were smoking crack there and subjecting the rest of the tennants to their irratic and crazy behavior. We finally got them outta there, but they just moved a new guy in...no proof, but I know what crack buy looks like and sounds like (pretty unusual skill for a white girl who grew up in suburbia huh?). But he's "not so bad" because he's quite and doesn't involve the other residents.

There also seems to be some kind of intelligence problem as well...my neighbor swears that us Jewish people pray to the Koran?! WTF Thinks Dr. Phil is a valid professional in the area of mental health instead of a strange form of daytime entertainment. Eats mostly sugar when she knows she's diabetic. I've read that mental illness does not affect IQ, but I'm starting to wonder...

Has anyone encountered anything similiar to these issues, and if so, how did you handle them?

Please let me know....

[NuckingFutz]

was this a bad post? Was not trying to offend anyone, just feel so alone in this adjustment process.

[Catherine2]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

was this a bad post? Was not trying to offend anyone, just feel so alone in this adjustment process.

No it wasn't a bad post, NuckingFutz, but it was an honest one. I think it took a lot of courage to post it.

It is hard working through the adjustment! Hopefully, it will get easier for you soon.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing, ok?

Catherine

[NuckingFutz]

thanks! I will keep coming here. This site and the people on it are so awesome!

[Catherine2]

NF,hugs if it's all right...

I admire the determination you are showing while you are doing the "adjustment process." Personally, I like the process...it feels positive to me.
Processes end and that gives us something to look forward to...it's not saying we stay static as I think we continually begin and end all sorts of processes. At least we know that the one we are currently struggling with will ease, though.

Best wishes,
Catherine

[NuckingFutz]

thanks for the feedback! You know. I thought about the positive aspect of all of this. I can still do a lot of stuff i use to. The only one stopping me is me! I can go 2 the different parks, window shop, go to museums, street fests, outdoor concerts...stuff like that!

[Catherine2]

How wonderful that you know you can do it--all these grand things waiting for you! I'm jealous!
I love street fests and outdoor concerts. Sometimes I will get triggered, though, with the noise. But I do my best to "prepare" myself for it. It's a trade off for me. Enjoy myself and don't worry about getting triggered or stay at home and mope because I'm bored.
It usually works out that I go and have fun...

[Junerain]

((((((NuckingFutz))))))

I grew up in a rich family and am now poor, it hurts, although I am in graduate school to one day not be so poor.....PM me, I feel I can relate.............

[pachyderm]

I did not have to adjust so much to life on a limited income -- I always had a limited income! Not having to spend lots of money on "things" can be liberating!

[jbug]

I find it hard to live on a limited income..I am on ssdi and also on section 8. I luckily am in an awesome place.

I came from a nice somewhat well to do family so when I had to do with the little amount I got with my disability check it was a major shock so I can relate.

It is hard but doable.

Jan

[madisgram]

the good news is that you have help tho it not be what you are accustomed to. there are many of us that have learned in time to adjust to major income changes in our lives. it's not always easy but change is usually difficult for everyone. i found that there are many ways to find help out there even those of us are with limited income and plus you do have the va for benefits. that is a blessing tho their system is archaic.
there are some ppl who do not know how or have the mental ability to accomplish what you have within the "system"..they truly are the unfortunates. what i try to do is to be grateful that i have some help be it different than what i've had in the past. if you take this attitude it will make the going easier for you. it won't always be the best of the best but as long as you can manage a cheerful outlook you can see the glass half full, not half empty. believe me when i say i know what adjustments you are going through. there are many of us in american today and growing. there are middle class families without a home now, no job, and no help.
as for dr. phil....he does have a phd in psychology...not supporting his idealogy necessarily but he is qualified with educational experience. (a former therapist of mine went to school with him.)

[AAAAA]

The silver lining as mentioned before is that when you have a limited income you really have to determine what you need versus what you want. Our income has been greatly reduced in the past two years. At first I was a basket case then it occurred to me that I have a place to live, food to eat and my children are healthy. Nothing else matters.

Some years ago we had an ice storm that took down the power lines. We were without power for almost two weeks. Thankfully it was still mild enough that a few extra layers in the house were all it took to be comfortably warm but cold enough to keep food frozen outside. But I look back at those weeks very fondly, I cooked meals that took all day so that the heat from the oven warmed the house, we ate every meal as a family after dinner we played board games, when it was dark we went to bed. With no TV, video games or computers we entertained each other. We were well rested and everyone had ideas as to what to do for entertainment. We all had a blast and we tried to keep it up after the power was back on but the electronics slowly pulled us all back in.

That harship forced us to come up with some other idea. This economic hardship has forced most of us to take a serious look at our lifestyle and determine what's important. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing.

Prior to 2007, if we wanted something we bought it. My husband stopped by Wal-mart after working afternoon shift for some toiletries and saw people standing in line in the electronics department so he just stood in line, with no clue what he was waiting for. It turned out to be the latest handheld gaming systems. Our kids had not even asked for the stupid things yet but he bought one for each of them.

Now there is rarely any money left over for extra things, and when there is it's because we cut back somewhere to get it. Gifts are given a great deal of thought now and greatly appreciated. I don't think that's a bad lesson for our youth to learn. My kids always have always had good manners, but I don't think they fully appreciated a gift before. For Mother's Day my son asked what I wanted, I told him I'm much rather him clean the bathroom than buy me a gift. A few years ago, this would have never occurred to me. I would much rather have them do an extra chore that I don't like doing.

[NuckingFutz]

i want to thank you for the support and feed back. I guess take things one day at a time. I even thought to use rags for toilet paper and throw them out right away until i can get some tp at the food bank tomorrow. I can also go to the mental health shelter to wash sheets towels and jeans for free and handwash the rest. i also have 2 possible part time job leads...one is under the table, but unless she comes out from under the table and complies with federal law, i can't work for her. I cannot work full time due to my mental health. But i can keep looking...i am going to goodwill this week to apply, i was told they have a waiting list, i will apply just the same. I know i will have bad days where getting out of the house is impossible, but for the most part, once i am working, i think i will feel a lot better about myself in being able to take care of myself and my cats. They are taken care of now...food, litter, just had their advantage flea treatment for the month.

[Shangrala]

I was raised in a financially stable home life. And considering the size of our family, we had it pretty good. All 10 of us were spoiled in our own right.

Once out of the home, however, I encountered my own travesties which delivered me some pretty hard times, resulting in extreme financial misfortunes. Eventually leading me to homelessness and having to face the realities of what that entails.

I have to admit, however, that during that period of my life, I came to some serious terms about what appreciation is all about. And since, have no longer viewed life as settling for what isn't....but rather, thankful for what is.
All those tiny, seeminly insignificant things we tend to take for granted, have since become quite significant to me.
For me, contentment isn't about things obtained, but in the value of how I'm living, (lately not all that progressive, but it will improve). Sure, having nice things and money to obtain them is convenient, but, imo that is not what truly satisfies.

I realize that this has lil to do with the original post....but by reading that I couldn't help but to think about how much gain there can be to a loss, (of course, that varies depending on the individual and circumstance).

NF~ I think it's taken strength to share what you have with us, and it sounds to me that you're on the right path.

Shangrala

[NuckingFutz]

thank you shangrala.

[RDRK]

I recently lost my job and am looking to other resources that might help. I was on FMLA when they terminated my position AND... my disability had been approved with the disability insurance that I had paid into for the past eight years. Now without that additional income... I feel like I'm a failure. That the financial struggles that my husband and children have to deal with is my fault . Although we have had our ups and downs when we were previously financially distraught... I feel like it's my job to try and go out and get a different job. Even though I know that I can't handle the stress right now and the change over of meds. I am not even ro the point of being stable. At times I can't even crawl out of bed. Or wake up to get my kids on the bus. I could count how many times the kids missed the bus on my fingers and toes put together in the last month!

At least you know where to start with getting the resources that you have available for your disability. My husband has suggested that I apply for Short Term SSI... but I don't want to be rejected again. That can bring me down quicker that snot runs out of my nose when I cry for hours.

I keep telling myself that it can only get better. Our love as a family and for each other was always better when we didn't have a "pot to pee in." Besides I have learned from experience money does not make you happy just because you are able to keep up with the Jones'! (No offense intended to the Jones') There are a lot of people out their struggling worse than us... that have really put themselves out on a limb because they were living with huge shoes to fill. Be happy that we appreciate the little opportunities that are given to us. And remember, the grace of god shall provide. (Not that I'm a religious person). But there are several chapters in Psalm's that you can find comforting during our times of struggle.

Good luck... keep your chin up! And... remember we have been dealt a crappy hand of cards to start with, and we can handle it! There are a lot of positives to being Bipolar and other comparable diagnosis, such as... we have very creative minds and are talented in whatever we want to do with our lives. I read many postings of individuals who are going back to school and finishing out further education. Can you imagine what a great Therapist we would be with our personal experiences. The absolute best in the history of path... the experience that a individual has truly lived during their own lifespan.

[Slippers]

I was totally into your post until this part, "(pretty unusual skill for a white girl who grew up in suburbia huh?)". I'm thinking you might want to reword it. It could have been written without your race being mentioned.

Being black OR white, after growing up in suburbia, then being exposed to crime plagued, crack infested housing would be shocking.

I work with addicts every day and in my 'hood - most of them are caucasian.

It's a sensitive topic. I just want to make sure people are aware of the issue.

Slippers

[NuckingFutz]

Originally Posted by Slippers

I was totally into your post until this part, "(pretty unusual skill for a white girl who grew up in suburbia huh?)". I'm thinking you might want to reword it. It could have been written without your race being mentioned.

Being black OR white, after growing up in suburbia, then being exposed to crime plagued, crack infested housing would be shocking.

I work with addicts every day and in my 'hood - most of them are caucasian.

It's a sensitive topic. I just want to make sure people are aware of the issue.

Slippers

i sincerely appologise to anyone i offended and thank you slipper for pointing that out. the remark was thoughtless and racist. I will use more compassion and empathy before i go off like that.

[Yoda]

I can empathize with you with the difficulities of a limited income. I was disabled ten years ago and the reduction in my income was dramatic. I had to use money in my retirement fund to pay off the remaining mortgage on my farm and now I have $2000 left in my retirement fund. I hope I don't live to be old because that won't help very much.

I am struggling to meet my bills from month to month. My son went to a PA several weeks ago which fortunately because of our low income was a free visit but his Adderal alone costs about $200 so I do not have the money to fill his prescriptions. I feel like a bad mother but I don't know what to do. I am lucky that I am able to have a house but it seems that there are repairs needed often that I have not in my budget. Electrician, new water heater and right now my AC is not working and I am really scared how much that will cost.

I am down to the wire. I have ten cents in my bank account and don't get my disability payment for another five days. I have little food in the house and last night my son and I wanted to buy a six dollar pizza. I didn't have six dollars. He has some money saved and said he would buy the pizza but I feel like it is my responsibility to feed my child and that made me feel really horrible.

To make things worse somebody stole a thirty-five pound bag of dog food off my front porch last week. I don't have money to buy dog food and my dog is having to share the cat food until I get paid. I have cut back on how much I am feeding them because I don't think the one partial bag is going to last until I can buy more.

A note regarding the white girl statement. This is my opinion and not intended to stir a debate but it seemed fine to me to say that she had grown up a white girl in that setting. Certainly minority groups are quick to identify themselves as such and if you don't think there is discrimination against white people (just as dsicrimination against others) read the comment stated by our Supreme Court justice nominee. She has been getting a lot of flack for her statement dissing white men. Sorry I don't have the link handy at the moment.

Another thought (sorry if my post seems disjointed) is that you can get food from food banks to help.

My best to you.

[NuckingFutz]

yoda, thank you for post. I bet your son was proud to be able to pay for the pizza. I guess folks are in a world of hurt to steal your dogs food! And about your son's medicine, there are programs out that will assist or even pay for it. You might want to check with your local churches as well as some pharm web sites. As far as food goes, those food banks have been a life saver!

[Catherine2]

Yoda,
This link is where I started when I could not pay for my prescriptions. Two were free, one had a copay of $2, and the other copay was $10.

It's based on income, and the people assisting are caring individuals. I received my AD almost immediately...my physician faxed a scrip to them and they sent it out...this was before they had the income information. They did it so I would not be without it.

http://www.needymeds.org/

On the left side of the screen you will find information about the different programs available with the drug companies and their requirements.
There are other things on the site, but the left is where the patient assistance programs are listed...

Best wishes,
Catherine

[Yoda]

Catherine2

Thank you so much for that information. I really appreciate it immensely.

[Yoda]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

yoda, thank you for post. I bet your son was proud to be able to pay for the pizza.

Why, NuckingFutz, what a nice thought. Isn't that what they call cognitive restructuring process where you change faulty thinking with more beneficial ones?

I feel so much better about that now. You are so supportive. Thank you.

[NuckingFutz]

you are so welcome...it feels good to be able to be supportive!