[Elysium]

So...I got offered a 13 week Nursing contract through my agency I work for. It's at this "hospital" I've never worked at before here in town. I did my first day of orientation on Wednesday. Oh...and I only get ONE day of orientation.

This "Hospital" is a nightmare!! It's not even a real hospital!! It has about 50 beds, and it's considered a "Long Term Acute Hospital" This means, it has no OR, no ICU, no ER, just beds for people who have been pushed out of the real hospitals because they've been so sick for so long that medicare no longer will reimburse the hospital for their care....so hospitals say they have to go. The problem with this is that these are the sickest of the sick patients. 95% of them are on ventilators because they can't breath on their own. Most of them can't get out of bed without 2-3 people to help. They actually belong in a Critical Care unit...but again, Medicare will not reimburse so the hospitals push them out.

This place is so dangerous. There are not enough nurses or nurses aids to help. You are given a walkie-talkie to carry around so you can call for help, but anytime you call, no one responds to your call. They do not train you to work with the ventilators, they just expect you to do it, and these patients are so sick that they could turn the corner and go down hill at any point. When/if they do, all you can do is call 911 and hope they get there in time.

So, on my first day, Wednesday, it was pretty good because I was working with another nurse and we only had three patients between us. It was great. But now I feel like they threw me to the wolves. I am on my own now. I don't feel safe practicing there. The best analogy I have is when you see someone drowning, and you know how to swim, but your hands have been tied behind your back. You know if you jump in and try to help the drowning people, you will drown too. Your only choices are to sit back and watch, or jump in and hope for the best. The only thing is...if you don't save the drowning people and you happen to make it back to land alive, you will be blamed for the person drowning to begin with....and you will be held responsible for their demise. It's like we are being set up to fail.

I was so sick at work today. My feet were burning like they were on fire and they hurt so bad I could barely walk. My leg was going numb from my chronic nerve problems and my sciatica was acting up too. If you let yourself slow down to think you immediately fell behind. When I finally got to go to lunch, I called my agency Manager and told him that I was not going to be able to complete the contract and explained to him why. He tried everything. He said he'd give me more money, he said he'd try to get them to lower my nurse/patient ratio. I was shocked. I told him that it wasn't about the money and that lowering the ratio wouldn't change the fact that I'd still be sitting there watching them drown...and I just couldn't do it.

I ended up canceling the contract because I can not cope with the pain, the anxiety/stress that comes with it. But now the agency is saying that since I quit, they will be recording it as a quit, even though they did not have me sign paperwork yet for the contract and now I could loose my unemployment insurance.

I was five minutes from living out on the streets, then I got this contract. But I wouldn't survive this...and I'm not going to sacrifice my nursing license and career for a company that doesn't give a crap about me. Actually I'm not going to sacrifice it for anyone.

I've been crying since I got home because I don't know how to feel. I'm angry....from holding it in all day. I just don't know what I'm going to do.

I'm scared, but I can't go back there. I won't survive. I have a better chance of survival on the streets.

[Ascension]

I can't begin to imagine how you feel. I am sorry that the world has places like this. It isn't fair to anyone that a place like that exists. I am sorry you were put in that position, cause like you said that is an environment that would swallow almost anyone. I hate not knowing what to say. I knew from one of your earlier posts that you were such an advocate for your patients and this had to have been your worst nightmare. I hope everything works out well and you connect if you need to. I''m sorry.

The situation you describe is analogous to the asylums for the mentally ill in days gone by. Warehouses for people whose next destination is expected to be the cemetery.

[paddym22]

Oh Elysium, You were put in an untenable situation, of course you did the right thing, if more people were like you, situations and services like this wouldnt exist. I dont really understand the insurance set up in the United States and I dont want to run it down but it does appear to be aimed towards the survival of the fittest and it is rather uncaring. I am worried now as to how you are feeling and the situation you have been put in at home due to the agencies uncaring attitude. Please know that we here at PC will look out for you, you are not alone in this.

Paddy

[Junerain]

I have done the same thing at times like this,, you are taking care of YOU, and there is a deep beauty to that

[perpetuallysad]

I think its important to stand up for what you believe in. I realize in this situation doing so has left you in a very bad situation, but I am still proud of you.

[pachyderm]

Is there a newspaper with good investigative reporting where you are, Ely?

(((Elysium)))
You did the right thing for you and all those poor people who would never truely get the help they need. It's a no win for everyone, very hard to deal with.
That is why I left my job in human services. Watching, week after week as the abuses to clients & staff were ignored and the safety of clients and staff was always at risk.
Can you report this place?
Don't beat yourself up. You have high ideals. Please never lose them. The world needs more people like you.

[lonegael]

(((((Elysium))))) you brave, caring, moral person! What you did was incredibly brave and I am so proud of having the chance to even be on the same page. I don't think you realize how few people whóuld have made the choice you did knowing what you do. The only sad thing is that these poor people don't have a caring, courageous nurse to help them at a time that they need it, but that is NOT YOUR FAULT. That is the insurance companies' and the hospitals' faults. I applaud you for standing up for yourself and pointing out thatthis is not acceptable. HHUUUGGGGGGSSSS and please stay in touch with how this works out.

[Miracle1986]

(((Ely)))
I feel for you.

[sanityseeker]

((((Elysium)))))))) so sorry you are being treated this way. So sad these kinds of places exist. My heart goes out to you and to the patients there.

I would suggest you try to be pro-active in a response to how you are being treated. If there is somewhere you can go to report this..... your professional nursing association comes to mind as a good first place and perhaps they can back you up to make further reports. Secondly it might be good for you to speak to someone at the unemployment insurance office to give them a heads up about what went down. It is important to not let life happen to you in these situations but instead to take charge from the start.

Of course catch your breath first and remember you are a strong, able and compassionate woman. This is an opportunity for you to stand up for what is right for you and for the patients being warehoused by a heartless system. You go girl! You may not know it but you are up for this challenge. You can make a difference. You will not be standing alone. Just think of us as all being there with you.

[Hunny]

Agree with Sanityseeker. There are some scam employers out there and in the economic situation, it appears they get away with ....... don't want to say, but for these dear people it may be more true than not.

So glad you found this out early into this Elysium.
.

.

[Shangrala]

Originally Posted by pachyderm

Is there a newspaper with good investigative reporting where you are, Ely?

I so agree with pachy. If you can, try to get the media involved.
Sanity has some real good points as well.

We are all behind you on this. Keep strong and us informed...

Shangrala