[Squirrel1983]

So, I've been seeing a psychiatrist since October 2008. I hid it from my family (fairly easy as I live alone) when I first started going. I just thought they would frown on the fact that I was taking medication and tell me to get off it, so I didn't bother saying anything or telling them. I told my former pastor that I was on medication about a week after I started because he asked how I was doing and was one of several people who suggested I see a professional for my feelings. But I was afraid to admit it to my family.

Then the time came (last month) when I was short on money and needed some for my monthly visit and medication (I don't currently have insurance, so I pay out of pocket). I really didn't want to take out a cash advance from somewhere like Amscot, so I decided to go to my dad and step-mom for money. Of course, I couldn't ask for money without telling them what it was for, so I finally admitted to them that I was on medication and seeing a psychiatirst. Surprisingly...they took it better than I thought they would and let me borrow the money. They didn't seem concerned at all.

Then came my toughts about wondering if I had symptoms as a kid. My dad was never home when I was a kid, he was the bread-winner and worked all day. My step-mom didn't know me as a kid (they married after I finished college), so I had to turn to my mom to ask. I dreaded asking her as she is completely again mental health medications. But, I admitted to her that I was seeing a psychiatrist and wanted some input to take back to my next appointment with me concerning my diagnosis. She immediately asked if I was on medication. I tried to avoid telling her that. So, I couldn't lie, so I told her I was...which meant I had to explain why I was (since I am medicated for something other than my official dx).

She flipped out and told me I needed to stop taking it immediately because all psychiatric drugs kill brain cells. *argh* I responded with I would rather be on medication than constantly watching my back out of fear that I'll be harmed. She didn't like the answer, but it shut her up.

I'm just curious if anyone else took so long to be open with their family about their treatment? How open should one be with their family about such things? Anyone else have family that thinks medication is wrong?

I do not know how open people should be. My illness was apparent to my family. Every now and then I meet acquaintances from years ago who act surprised I am still alive. I was a bit embarrassed for awhile. Then I accepted I needed help.

[thunderbear]

My family aleady knew alot of my problems I have. i've been seeing a psychiatrist off and on since I was 5. But they don't know the extent of it. They pretty much have the same opinons on psych meds as your mom. They think that all meds like that are addictive because they seem to hear everything about the addictivness of benzos so they lump all psych drugs in with that.

[birdcrazy]

I had severe problems as a kid even, but my family denied it and blamed it on me not being punished enough (I was actually punished and spanked a lot for my behavior problems, so I don't understand that reasoning)

Even nowadays, I am told to just "suck it up" all the time. One of my relatives even claims he's as ill as me but he can suck it up and I should too, but I don't believe that totally.

[Skully]

Be as open as you feel comfortable being. Your illness is a need to know basis. What you tell others is up to you entirely.

[Shangrala]

I'm to the point with my family that they can screw off if they don't like what's going on in my life. They never gave a rat's anall about what I was really going through while I was young, and certainly not now.

I wont go out of my way to tell them jack. But if they do find out, I couldn't care any less. How they feel about it will be of no surprise to me...It'd be just another added disapproval to their already-extensive list of "what is wrong with Mary".
(Funny how, though all of us do suffer from some form of mild to extensive emotional issue, I'm the only one who cares enough to confront it..Hmmm).

I agree...its a need to know sort of thing...

Shangrala

[mamaJenof5]

I have had BD symptoms since I can remember (5 or so) and my mom and step-dad just thought I was a moody/bad kid. My dad killed himself when I was 2 so I never knew him but from what I learn about him from others he also was Bipolar. My mom always thought I was making up things that I would try to explain to her just to get attention and such. I cryed out for help for years. Finally when I tryed to kill myself at 14 (the first time I was 10) a teacher helped me talk to someone and they told me I was probably bipolar. I did alot of research for years after that. I had my son at 17 and I moved out on my own so I finally saw pdocs and after years (and years) of different docs and meds and episodes, finally my mom will agree she missed something wrong with me as a child. My brother and sister have some of the same issues and it wasn't untill my sister (younger) needed to go on meds my mom finally woke up and thought hey maybe there are issues that need meds. I don't tell many people about what is wrong with me b/c it takes alot for me to trust someone. I also hate when I tell someone things and they brush them off like I'm overly dramatic. Thank God my husband is 100% understanding and supportive or I don't know where I'd be. Good luck and hang in there. You just worry about yourself and how you think/feel about you. No one else has to live with your problems/issues more than you do anyway

[Fresia]

It is entirely your choice how much you want to disclose. What's important is your health and well-being!

My family has known of my struggles since I was little. Being on meds and continuing therapy has been no surprise to them but they would rather see me alive and functioning than be without. With this in mind, they have even helped when I wasn't able to afford either. I cannot function without the meds and T. With friends, some really close friends know and more do not. For me, unless my disorder affects the relationship and that I feel I can completely trust them, then I may say but it stays on a guarded 'need to know' basis. Then again, a friend of mine does not discuss any of her meds or therapy with her family.

Your family may need some time to consider this development in your life and just as you are becoming educated, they need to learn about you and what treatment really means. They may or may not be accepting even with the new information but it is up to you with what you are comfortable with to ensure your well-being first and foremost.

[la doctora]

My mom knows that I am depressed but that is the extent of what my folks know. My dad is a hard knocks kind of guy and doesn't believe in meds for anything basically. He would think I should just "get over it". I really wish I could tell my mom I am bipolar but I am ashamed of it. I know I shouldn't be as it is a medical disorder and I can't help it. But I was raised to be tough and I used to be tough. Now that I am not tough anymore it is hard to face my weaknesses. I will be moving closer to my mom and dad soon. I'm hoping that I can talk to my mom about it during the extra time we will get to spend together. She understands about my dad and is sympathetic mostly. I just don't want her to ever feel that I am lazy. I know I am just exhausted but I know that it can look like laziness to others. Hence why I feel ashamed. I am constantly worried about what others will think. Another thing I shouldn't concern myself with, I know... But the meds make me tired and without the meds I can't function. Oh well.

Anyway I understand how it feels not to want to tell anyone about my problems. I hope you work it out for yourself and things go well with whatever you decide to do.

[Typo]

My parents know I go to therapy, hard to keep that from them since I am still on their insurance and such. I don't tell them why I am in therapy and they don't ask, they also know I have tried a few medications, my mom and dad are both take medication for depression and anxiety.

However they won't accept the fact I was diagnoised with bipolar II disorder and they sort of mock that I have PTSD. They won't accept any diagnosis other than depression or anxiety, I guess partially that is my fault because I keep my symptoms hidden from them.

I think it is a need to know basis with family, family is tricky and sometimes they have a hard time accepting things. I don't think one should feel shame over this, or feel they have to hide it, to me seeing a therapist, a pdoc, or taking a medication to me is the same as if I was taking care of a physically onset illness, my mental health is a part of my life, and I have to treat it like any other part of my life with care and delicacy.

I am glad your dad and step mom were supportive and helped you out.

Best wishes
Typo

[El-ahrairah]

I personally have trouble being open with them. I want a t but i live with my folks and im too scared to bring it up or anything for that matter....

[Elana05]

Originally Posted by Squirrel1983

...all psychiatric drugs kill brain cells. *argh*

How ironic. A few months ago I saw this special on public television (This Emotional Life) that included some episodes on mental health. Through that and through the book Against Depression by Peter Kramer, I learned that studies clearly show that untreated depression can harm the brain over time, but that some antidepressant medication has been shown to actually repair damaged brain cells (in the hippocampus).

I can relate, though... My mom has told me she doesn't think people should have to "rely on pills" but still calls wine "her medication." Ugh.

Kudos for asking for help from your family for your treatment even though it was hard. If I have to tell people, I also try to begin with "I've been diagnosed with..." to let them know I'm being seen by a doctor.

The most important thing is that you care for yourself...

My best wishes to you.

E

[sunrise]

I share very little of my health information with anyone--friends or family. Perhaps I might tell people if I was seeing a therapist or pdoc, if it seemed appropriate, but I would not give details on my treatment--what techniques are used, etc. Pharmacological intervention is one technique that is frequently used by pdocs. I just don't think people need to know exactly what techniques are used. Is it pharmacological, behavioral, EMDR, or what? All they might need to know is that I've had some challenges in recent years and have taken responsible steps to take care of my health.

When I first started seeing a PNP, I did tell my mother that the PNP thought I might have ADHD. My mom got angry and said, "you do not have ADHD!!!" It was an odd reaction--what does she know? I think maybe she didn't like hearing that a medical professional had pronounced that one of her children was defective in some way. Earth to Mom--I'm not perfect, in so many ways.

[brilliant]

Of course, the choice is yours. Family is not always the best avenue to take. Witholding from them about where you are in life can be the best thing to do if you know that you may spiral downhill because of their comments. My family is not supportive. Or perhaps I should say, they are only supportive in what "they" believe in. They like to judge me and what I do because it is not in alignment or congruent with what they want. I still have two sisters that get together and gossip about me. I hear it through the grapevine. For pete's sake, I thought this only happened in elementary & high school! So in the end, there are things I choose to speak openly about because I know their comments don't bother me, but there are other things I choose not to speak openly about because I don't want to hear there insults.