[splitimage]

My life is pretty much a complete mess right now. I've posted bits and pieces about it in other forums, mainly addictions.

But the short version is, in the space of a week, I lost my job, relapsed, crashed (totalled) my new car, was moderately injured in the crash, and have been forced into going to a hospital daily for supervised medication under the threat of losing my licence. I've spent the last couple of days doing nothing but crying and distracting myself on-line, and fighting the urge to self injure.

But, even though I'm still crying, I know thing's could be a lot worse. I've got friends I can talk to. I'll get a severence package from work, and when that runs out I qualify for unemployment & I have savings. I got a lead on a job today - who knows if i'm qualified for it, but it's a lead. I've been to a couple of AA meetings and know that AA can help me get better.

The most important thing I remembered is that I have the ability to start over. I've had to start over multiple times before and i always have, so I have to remember that as much as I might think my life sucks now, I have the ability to start over, and I have to believe that things will get better.

And I think if we remember that, things can get better for all of us too.

--splitimage

Thank you for posting this, splitimage. You are so right on. No matter what happens to us, we can get up and start again, no matter how tough it seems. There is always the chance to try again after a relapse, or after tough times. I wish you the best of luck on this job lead, and feeling better in general.

[kikki27]

Originally Posted by splitimage

My life is pretty much a complete mess right now. I've posted bits and pieces about it in other forums, mainly addictions.

But the short version is, in the space of a week, I lost my job, relapsed, crashed (totalled) my new car, was moderately injured in the crash, and have been forced into going to a hospital daily for supervised medication under the threat of losing my licence. I've spent the last couple of days doing nothing but crying and distracting myself on-line, and fighting the urge to self injure.

But, even though I'm still crying, I know thing's could be a lot worse. I've got friends I can talk to. I'll get a severence package from work, and when that runs out I qualify for unemployment & I have savings. I got a lead on a job today - who knows if i'm qualified for it, but it's a lead. I've been to a couple of AA meetings and know that AA can help me get better.

The most important thing I remembered is that I have the ability to start over. I've had to start over multiple times before and i always have, so I have to remember that as much as I might think my life sucks now, I have the ability to start over, and I have to believe that things will get better.

And I think if we remember that, things can get better for all of us too.

--splitimage

Thats good you know you can start over and theres hope 4 you .We as humans are not perfect so dont feel bad in life what you did cause we are alowed to make mistakesbut you gotta to learn from them.Get yourself a good support group and stay in the aaa meetings .I wish you the best in life.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Hey split,

You've really had a rough time all those things happening at once. Don't judge yourself harshly because you think things could be worse. The things that have happened to you are most certainly a trigger for depression and grief & loss.

If I were you I'd be getting some advice on depression when you go to the hsopital for your medication; you're in the perfect place to get some help for it...

take care,

Rhi

[googley]

((((Split))))

I'm sorry all of this is happening to you. It does really all seem to happen at one time when it happens. I'm glad you are keeping a positive attitude at this very stressful time. We are here to support you through this tough time. I'm glad you are taking care of yourself. That is really important.

splitimage, good luck with starting over.

[darkrunner]

Thank you for sharing, Splitimage.
I'm sorry it's been so rough for you lately.
But your positive attitude is a good reminder for me to never give up.

[Perna]

Thank you for that wonderful reminder! Sorry you had to share it the hard way. I didn't get much sleep last night from horrible thoughts and kept trying to remind myself I could do something about them today so am feeling kind of fresh startish myself.

Good luck with finding another job and getting through the car thing and med supervision, etc.

[glassroses]

I'm new, but I thought I'd pop my head out, because I think it's amazing that you can still see the long run despite everything else, and know that even though things have gone wrong now, you have the ability to learn from them and move on.
One of my T's told me the metaphor of the spiral staircase- as you go around the staircase, you fell like you're going around in circles and seem to arrive at where you were before, but you have to remember you're one floor higher than before, and you are different/better.
Climbing is really, really hard, but keep turning the corners, and you'll move up. Good luck

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((splitimage))))

I am so sorry you are going through so much but I thank you for what you said. So many times when things fall all around us we tend to see the glass as half empty but instead it could be still half full. I think that as long as we continue to get up after we fall, or have a set back, or relapse, we can start over. It is when we fall and refuse to get back up that we have no chance to start again.

Sometimes we need to take a break or a rest before we can get back up. Maybe we need to look around us and see where we are and think on what may have made us fall. Maybe we need to re-access our thoughts and goals, or our ways to get to the next level but even in resting we can be moving slowly if we are looking at what we can do when we get up.

Thank you for reminding us all that we can start over for at times I even forget that, especially when the storms roll in and the black clouds seem to hide my view and cover hope. I hope that that job will pan out for you and if not we will keep you in our thoughts for another to come about. Keep reaching up and thank you for sharing. Know that we are here for you and care.

Sending gentle hugs and loving thoughts. Always.

dps

[Junerain]

Today is the first day of the rest of each one of our lives


Standing right beside you, splitimage, with all the hope and optimism possible for one heart to have