[inkblot]

I've had a totally bad day. I want to cry or scream or self-medicate. I left called and left my T a voice mail. I had to vent to him, even if by voice mail. And now I am here. A guy I used to work with called me at 2:38 this morning! I have not returned his calls, emails or text messages ever since he emailed me pics of his groin! That was well over a month ago. I let his calls always go to voice mail. He woke me up--again--as seems to be habit with him! Then later before I woke up I had a really bad dream. Not a nightmare, but it was bad. It was about my relationship with my family--mom and brother. It's not good and in the dream we weren't getting along and it was just horrible. OMG! I just checked my email and that guy emailed me pics of himself AGAIN!!!! Okay, I may cry. I can't concentrate now. I had my first day at work today. I learned that they do regularly fill morphine prescriptions, so I will have to get back on several prescriptions because I am severely allergic to that type of medication, even airborn exposure without touching. So I have that to worry about. I can't get in to for prescriptions anywhere either, so I have to figure that one out. Plus, working in pharmacy has been a trigger before because of drug manufacturer names and I associate with the name of my ex-husband, so that's another worry. I got out of work today and had a voice mail from a guy who touched me inappropriately a couple weeks ago which I reacted to. It's been a long and hard day. What am I doing working in pharmacy when after all the negative today my mind wants to get high on something or self-medicate on something?! I can't do that! I need to get rid of these feelings but I don't know how. I'm not sure what I am feeling. I don't know if I am sad, or anxious or what. I am almost like in shock. Or numb? I don't know anymore. I just wish I had my T tonight.

[seeker1950]

Hi, Ink,
Well, gosh, this all sounds like various forms of sexual harrassment. The fella who touched you inappropriatley at work should be reported.
As for the man who is mailing you pics of his groin, but worked with you in a previous job. If you feel you would be safe in doing so, report it too...either to his work or to the authorities. There is no way you should put up with this!
Seeker

[CedarS]

Oh mama, what a combination of not-fun stuff to have happen to you! Hope your T contacts you, hope you catch a break from all the difficult stuff.

I wish that I could reach out and provide shelter and safety, comfort and respite.

S

[inkblot]

The guy who touched me inappropriately a couple weeks ago is another homeless person. It wasn't at work; today was my first day at my new job. The guy who emailed me those pics doesn't work at the same place anymore. I don't know where he works now. He is using his camera-phone to do it, though. I am thinking about changing my phone number again.

[inkblot]

Thanks. I would love if my T called me tonight, but I certainly doubt that he will. I called and left messages for him twice yesterday. And now after today... I hope he doesn't mind.

[CedarS]

Would police be helpful with the guy harassing you via email? Maybe at least take a report, keep track of what is happening? Sucks that you might have to change your phone number again, though sounds like that might help.

I hope the rest of your evening somehow goes better.

[inkblot]

I don't know. I haven't talked to this guy or made any contact with him for a while. Because I haven't actually told him to stop, I don't know if the police would do much. I don't even know the guys address, but I am sure they could look him up on the computer at the police station. I know what town he lives in. I was saving everything, but recently deleted everything from him. I was tired of reminders!

[h0kie]

Can you block his email account so even if he sends you an email it will go straight to the trash?

[eskielover]

Wow ink,

It all sounds so complicated....while reading your posts, the first thing I thought about the emails was the same thing that 1day told you....block his email account from entering yours.

The other thing I was thinking was to write down each of the things that is happening to you & then focus on how you can protect yourself from each one & write those ideas down next to the problem. The one thing I have found that helps me when I am being bothered by something it to figure out the best way I can FIGHT back. It seems to return to me a sense of power & being able to take over the situation into my hands to be the controling force rather than being the victem. Even if the solution is to report the person...it is taking a positive action to protect yourself. Dealing with the pharmacy issues & writing down how you can protect yourself against the feelings you are getting & what you would perfer to feel like & what might help you get through your feelings.....sounds like your T help is needed definitely, but maybe you can do your best until his help becomes available.

I have recently noticed that writing things down & dealing with each one helps me organize my thoughts & put ideas down as they come to me.

Please take care of yourself.....you have so many things on your mind right now....I am sure they are all swirling around in your brain waiting to be sorted out. I do hope you can get some help from your T, but hang in there until help arrives....hope we can give you some helping ideas & support while you are going through these rough times

Debbie

[blackdragon]

(((((((((((((((((((inkblot)))))))))))))))))))) im sorry your day has been so bad. *big hug* hang in there

[inkblot]

Thanks guys, but I am about to make a post in SI. I really wish that I had my T. I've bothered him so much already. I don't want to do it to him again.

[bebop]

if you know this guys phone number and where he lives you can have him arrested I am sure...they can get him for sending porn over phone lines. don't let him do this to you hon.

[soonforgotten]

wow blot I'm speechless but you've got my understanding and support (((((((((((((((((inkblot)))))))))))))))))) <font color="red"> </font>