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  #1  
Old Oct 09, 2010, 02:58 PM
Powermind14 Powermind14 is offline
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...and I mean unnecessary weight gain. Like to keep people from hitting on you and to keep your spouse from being jeolous..or maybe to punish him?

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  #2  
Old Oct 11, 2010, 08:37 AM
Rhiannonsmoon's Avatar
Rhiannonsmoon Rhiannonsmoon is offline
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Powermind14

We have never felt this way and do wonder how this would punish your husband when it is your health it impacts upon and your self esteem? It would be interesting to know why you would want to punish your partner

We have heard many many different complaints about gaining weight how uncomfortable it makes people feel physically and emotionally how it affects their mental and emotional state and how they wished they were not carrying it for all of those reasons

There are also other issues if your partner feels jealousy it is probaby not related to your looks at all Jealousy is a much deeper issue an issue of trust and fear of betrayal so that is an issue your partner needs to work with and you also if you feel jealousy

All that being said if by any chance you are a flirt (not saying you are just looking at scenarios) and you attract attention because you actually want it that is a whole different kettle of fish and is something that can lead to payback behaviour and tit for tat which would damage the partners and the relationship

Hoping to talk more about this situation and hoping to support you in any way possible that will lead to a resolution

Heleni
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  #3  
Old Oct 11, 2010, 10:52 PM
Powermind14 Powermind14 is offline
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Hi Helena and thanks for the response. I have tried to figure out my reasoning behind this emotion that seems to hit me when I am feeling overwhelmed from all the bipolar manias that catch up with me. It is as if I allow such high standards to be set for myself because when I am hypomanic I can attain extremely high standards. I have done competitive bodybuilding where I have gotten my bodyfat down to 6 %, and most of the time I am within 10 lbs. of being considered in "competition shape". So I think maybe this comes from me wanting to fade from site when I have stretched myself so thin that I simply want everyone to go away and leave me alone. As for the husband, maybe I feel that he totally does not understand the pressure I am under and think he should appreciate me more, relieve some of the pressure...I have no idea. Maybe it is just my obsessive compulsiveness, I am also ADD and bore very easily. I go through almost self destructive type behaviors (not physically speaking but visually speaking) where I want to chop all my long hair off, or gain a bunch of weight. It is a case of extremes, I get to wanting extreme change of some sort in my life and I guess it needs to be in a visible way. Why that is? I don't know, that is why I would like feedback on this weirdness of mine. I remember feeling this way on and off all the way back to my pre teen years. It makes me feel very alive to consider a dramatic change. I've been trying to figure out what goes on in my head for almost 4 decades, each year I learn more and more. Thanks for taking the time!
  #4  
Old Oct 12, 2010, 01:54 AM
Princess_Obsidian Princess_Obsidian is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2009
Posts: 537
Greetings,

Do you, by chance, see a therapist? If not, please do so, for your reasoning, to me, seems quite scary. Not only is gaining weight harmful for you, the motivation you have to want to do so is clearly not healthy.

If you and your spouse are having marital problems, may I kindly suggest you two seek counsel from a marriage counselor?

Have a good one.
  #5  
Old Oct 15, 2010, 03:15 PM
Powermind14 Powermind14 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2010
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Well whatever the cause of this weirdness since I changed mood stabilizers I have not felt that way...maybe just a manic OCD phase?
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