why is wanting attention so bad?

Why is it that I keep seeing posts with people apologizing for needing attention?

It seems that it's OK to admit to almost anything except NEEDING attention.

I need attention. I never had ANY as a child, so now I need it and want it. So what's so pathetic about that?

Every time I see a post that says " I don't want my T to think I'm seeking attention", I want to scream " Why the hell not" ?

Maybe attention is the cure for all of us.

I just had to get that off my chest.

Twinks

I agree with you. Attention can be a very positive thing. I too desire attention, but I won't go about it in such a negative way that could be damaging.

Wanting attention isn't bad. The ways that people choose to go about getting that desired attention are usually the problem.

It's like a child who misbehaves to get attention. They're getting negative attention, but it is attention.

Wanting/needing attention isn't bad at all.

Everyone wants to be recognized by others. Therefore all of us need some attention from others---nobody likes to feel that s/he is invisible.

However I will freely admit that people who seem to ALWAYS want to be the center of attention bother me. I generally find them to be either a) TOO needy or b) drama queens/narcissists etc. Very needy people are unnerving to me--they tend to be very dependent and want someone to solve their problems. Those who want to be the center of attention are just flat annoying---the "look at me, look at me" narcissistic stuff is very off-putting.

If we all didn't need attention, this site wouldn't exist IMNSHO. I also agree that the way some members go about getting attention tends to irk other members... we should all be able to acquire what we need in that respect without being upbraided, but it doesn't happen. I think it's when the member continually asks and does the exact same things over and over, when it doesn't appear as though they are taking anyone's "advice" that member's patience runs thin. ???

While I'm at it (soapbox?) I am also surprised that some members don't "get it" when it comes to what another member reads in (or into) another's post. We are each here for reasons, one of which is for what WE need.. and we tend to read posts with that "bent" in mind. Depending upon our own DX, we will respond as to whether we can read clearly what the poster needs, or what we are reacting to (insert our own trauma, drama.) Some members when in flare or trigger, can't possibly understand exactly the needs of another, and try to post something as a response.

All in all, if we can do the best we can, as members, and respond with GOOD attention for other members, then we will, with time, shape each other into better human beings. Ya think?

I don't want my doctor to think I'm seeking attention. It's not like what you talk about when I say that. When I started to SI my docotr automatically assumed that it was because I wnted attention....it didn't seem to cross his mind that release is what I need. I find nothing wrong with sometiimes wanting and needing attention, but I completely understand why so many people worry about people assuming their actions are just to get attention

I also feel many of us who are here were probably punished, in their childhoods, adolescences & even into adulthood (and may actually still being 'punished' in one way or another) for seeking attention.

My parents always responded negatively to any kind of overt emotional display I made, whether it was a temper tantrum or jumping around excitedly. As a teenager, well, everything me or my friends did as teenager was 'just trying to get attention - the world is NOT your stage, if you want attention so much, take a Drama class'... and now, as an adult, I work in what some would deem a hostile environment - anyone who actively seeks a promotion or tries to better themselves or 'flaunts' talents (as well as those who always bring their home issues & chronic illnesses to work) are automatically labeled a 'brown-noser' or Drama Queen/King & become the objects of mistrust & ridicule.

I am honestly now one of those people who do not seek attention - I prefer hiding in a cubicle & keeping my head down - I actively back away whenever anyone mentions my training for relief supervisor, usually w/holy water in one hand & a stake in the other, screaming, "Get thee behind me, Upper Management Tool!"