[splitimage]

I have a real pet peeve that I ran into again this morning. It's people assuming that just because I'm an alcoholic and have mental illnesses that I'm not capable of working. I've had a job since I was 15, except for 2007 when I really was too sick to work. As an adult I have always worked full time, again except for 2007. I have held very senior positions.

Yet I keep running into people who think I'm not capable of working.

Last April, I was out visiting my brother for Easter and we went to family friends for Easter dinner. My brother had obviously been sharing my ongoing challenges with them, because the wife says to me casually over dinner. "So I understand you're volunteering, that's great, are you also able to work part-time." She had the good grace to be embarrassed when I explained that I was holding down a full time job.

Then this past summer when I was just about to get out of IP, I was talking to my IP pdoc, and said I wasn't looking forward to job hunting. She said, "well if you can find something part-time, it won't interfere with your treatment." I told her I was looking for full time and in fact was applying for controller and finance director jobs. She was genuinely shocked.

Then this morning, I ran into a woman at the hospital when I went in to take my meds, who I used to be in a group with a couple of years ago. She dropped out because the group conflicted with her schedule, but I was working full time when we were in the group together. She asked how things were going overall, and I said great thanks. I just found a new job that starts in January. She then asked if it was a volunteer job. I said no it's a full time job at Sick Kids. She then looked genuinely puzzled and asked, what are you going to be doing there? I told her I was going in as a senior financial analyst and she was genuinely shocked, but wished me well.

I do realize a lot of people can't work because of their illness, and that's fine, but there are also lots of alcoholics who hold down responsible jobs, and lots of people with mental illnesses who with proper treatment are able to work full time or with some accomodation.

It just really pisses me off when people make negative assumptions about me.

--splitimage

[Fresia]

What's that phrase about when someone assumes, you make an *** out of you and well, just you, as in that person. It's always an awkward moment though and frustrating as hell. I am not working now but when I was and they knew about the illness but discovered I was working, I know that shocked look. I get it now b/c I am going to school and have a mental illness. I am pleased b/c I am able to function again, as there have been times I couldn't function at all, but there is a condescending tone that comes with it when they discover this. I try to brush it off b/c I know my possibilities and limitations; they have some mistaken notion of mental illness. Yes, it can be debilitating and is for many, (has been for me and I'm sure I'll have more moments), but especially with treatment, is the goal of treatment, is to turn it around. That seems to be forgotten and is inconceivable that could actually be functioning. Hmmm?

[Melbadaze]

When I was an active alcoholic I worked full time, that way I could keep up the pretense I was in control and also more deserving of a drink, once I got into treatment I decided p/t was enought, and I dont want to work full time, I do need that extra me time. I'm not sure why other peoples thoughts piss you off, all you have to do is correct them and thats that, no biggy, perhaps they think if they were struggling they wouldn't cope well with full time, I doubt its anything milacious in theri thinking, do you feel "attacked" by it? perhaps that is sign of stress?

[pegasus]

**** em!

Know you are doing well and prove them all wrong!

[lonegael]

I get the same type of response , sadly, from other mental health workers when they realize that I am a psykologist working full time and bilpolar I. The only one wh seemed able to handle that knowledge matter of factly was the p-doc I shared and office with at the child psychiatry unit in the town I worked in recently. Most folks seem to assume tht you are so caught up being " fussed with" that you just won't be able to work a full job.

[Skully]

Unfortunalty, those with mental diagnosis (I hate using the word "illness") and/or checmical dependance have a stigma. Everyone has the asumption that we are not capable of working because their "idea" of mental "illness" is pictured as the people in psych hospitals screaming out thier windows. I blame TV for the misconcenptions out there.

Good for you for straightening them out! And good for you for doing so well. You give the rest of us something to aspire to