[Irine]

Is this true about all things in life that we want the most? Getting to where we most desire to be puts us on this thin line between what we want the most and what we fear the most....?

Some things we write can trigger... some people can take offense.
Trigger icons and rules that forbid suicide posts are great solutions. Maybe not enough...but then what is enough? what is too much? the discussion can never end...

What I wanted to talk about was another thing regarding getting offended and triggered. I see those who are getting triggered or offended - get angry,disappointed and in then end judgmental.

I think it can help to make the situation more fair if those who read the posts and then consider them triggering or offensive try to put themselves in the persons position - visit more often their profile page and see what kind of problem they have - and remember that any reaction or writing that they consider too triggering to too offensive - may be the exact result of their problem and them also seeing that as triggering and offensive might be as result of theirs.

The safety problem here is no more than a result of all the troubled people coming together. I agree that we all should take each other`s feeling into account BEFORE we write...it is important. We can`t shake off responsibility for hurting another by playing innocent...

But when reading - i just think that before judging and getting angry and throwing the person out of the group - we should consider that every attack is a cry for help - at least those of us who are capable of handling the situation...

I don`t know if i will get spat in the face for pouring my feelings and if people will get angry and think that i am trying to teach something.

In another attempt to avoid misunderstanding - i will mention again - i am not saying in any way that every one who takes offense is`t justified - I am writing this because i have been on both sides...because i know exactly how it feels..

the safety violated, the trust betrayed....

I hope it brings peace to PC

[dagorelbrab]

im sure we all have been on both sides, we have not only been attacked but offended too, and have ourselves attacked someone and offended someone as well, there is a thing i sometimes try to do when i have time to reflect, i try to think of at least 3 possible reasons why they may have said what they did, before i react, it doesnt always work, i forget and dont feel like it, but it helps me find a reason to feel guilty at least, for not giving them the benefit of the doubt, i hope you find forgiveness and peace

[Vibe]

I like the trigger icon for things which will probably offend people. I don't like censorship at all. I'd rather hear what someone has to say and not like it, than to have them keep it to themselves and present a false picture to me.

The reason I like trigger icons is because if someone will be bothered by what is posted they can always choose not to read it. A little explanation in the title or at the beginning of the article is all it takes. I think if you know something will offend you, and you choose to read it, then you automatically take responsibility for that.

Now, this pretty much applies to things you can expect people to be triggered by. But this is a forum for people with mental disorders. I've seen people get upset over very benign conversations. You can't please everyone. Why bother trying? My view, when I get offended, is that it's my own problem and I need to learn to deal with it somehow. If I'm not moving forward then none of the rest of it matters anyways. It doesn't have much to do with forgiveness and the other person. It has more to do with how I'm going to handle difficulties in my life.

This is different than an actual attack though. When someone actively goes out of their way to hurt you, then you're automatically in a confrontational situation. That makes most people angry. It should.

Forgiving after should be for one's own sake. It keeps you from having to carry that weight around. I've stopped believing in making sacrifices so we can 'just all get along' though.