New here. with an important question.

Well hello,

I am new here. My name is Kyle, and I am a 20 year old man, a father, and a husband. Doing rather well in the world. A big change for me, but now I am worried.

I was diagnosed with general schizophrenia about 4 years ago, when I was 15 or 16 years old. Most of it was me over-amplifying the symptoms for time off school. Anyway, After about a year I realized that my symptoms weren't as bad as I thought, and I stopped taking my meds, and the symptoms went away completely. I spoke to my psychiatrist, and he told me, the symptoms either are dormant, or it was a misdiagnoses. Not really sure what was going on. So, I went on my merry way, now have a 7 month old daughter, I have been married for almost a year now, and I am pursuing supervisor positions at a technology company that I am working for.

Here is the thing. Previously, when the symptoms started the very first time, I noticed weeks before the hallucinations started; I noticed extreme confusion, and inability to form sentences. Also the inability to keep eye contact with people when I was speaking with them. Which I am assuming was the onset of the illness.

Now, after two years of smoot sailing I am noticing once again I am having trouble saying what I want to say. I know what I am trying to say, but cannot speak it; like I don't know the language well enough to put together the sentence. Also, when reading aloud to my wife documents for proofreading; words I used to be able to express with ease, are now troublesome to even spell out. Which i also don't understand - I have always been an extremely advanced reader. When I speak with people, people who I have never been shy with talking to, I now cannot hold eye contact with them in conversations for more than a few seconds because I feel uncomfortable the moment I reach their eyes.

Life is becoming more and more stressful as these things slowly compound, and now that they are in my conciousness; I am quite frankly.....WORRIED

I am wondering if it's coming back, and praying to god at the same time that it's not; I have too much to lose from Schizophrenia again.

Any advice is greatly appreciated. I can be reached by e-mail at any time.

Kyle
Kaarst@cox.net

I don't know much about Schizophrenia, but I deff would seek help with a therapist. Make a appnt. asap. I hope you get everything worked out. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

To me it doesn't sound like schizophrenia. those that I know that are scizophrenic don't suddenly have trouble with public stuff like reading aloud and proof reading and so on. and they dont have a problem with eye contact. quite the opposite they hold eye contact and get very irate because they think that person is out to harm them or get them is some way so because of paranoia they don't want that person out of their sight. As long as they can see that person they can protect themselves from whatever harm they are percieving coming from that person. (or object)

It sounds to me like its a learning disorder problem not a mental health problem.

for example I have dislexia - reading is sometimes a challenge. It used to be a huge problem for me. when I was 18 my reading level was 9 th grade. And that was after taking a spcial class to retrain my eyes and brain. I still have problems sometimes like when I'm under stress of reading aloud or if I haven't had enough sleep I tend to call some words others and see letters out of order or see the word but not know quite what it is.

No one here is practicing therapy and diagnosis while on this site. so the only way you can be sure is to contact a psychiatrist or psychologist and ask that they do a comprehensive psychological Evaluation on you.

This is an interview session, IQ testing and psychiatric tests like the MMPI.

Once you have the results back you will know for sure if it is a learning disorder or a mental disorder and the recommended treatment plan to help you.

I am sorry that I don't know enough about schizophrenia to answer your question....& then again, it seems that even the professionals aren't real good at initially identifying what is going on either.

I guess the one thing I might think of initially, rather than adding to your stress level the fear that schizophrenia is coming back , would be to look at your anxiety level......all the things that are new in your life over the past year (marriage, baby, pursuing a supervisory position at work, working hard to be successful in your career). You have alot going on in your life & I have found that when I end up overloaded (even though I don't realize how overloaded I am), I end up with my mind doing just about everything you have explained. I end up focused so much internally that I find it hard to express myself to others.

I know that anxiety may not be the answer, but if it were me, I would hold onto the idea that the past Dx of schizophrenia was misdiagnosed. Personally, I would observe myself for a while without jumping to the conclusion of schizophrenia coming back into your life. I have found it hard for pdocs to Dx conditions initially when symptoms show up. I have gone through pdocs trying to figure out what was happening to me several times during the past 12 years. When I first had to leave my job because of anxiety attacks (I hated the position I had at work & was trapped....only way out was to leave on medical leave of absense. The anxiety over the first year turned into depression & then into suicidal issues that continued for years. Along with that came anorexia problems. They couldn't figure out what name to label me with. Things settled down about 3 years ago until my Mother was Dx'ed with cancer. Because of her poor judgement alot of other issues, a home care RN got involved & I caught her stealing my mothers ID. I ended up going through a horrible trauma & with stress, I lost too much weight again. The pdoc that worked in the medical hospital I was being treated in insisted that it was anorexia again....insisting that I needed to be in an ED treatment center. I tried to find help & the placed I talked to clued me into the fact that is was the stress I was going through & not "body image".....I had gone through a trauma, but because I was being treated while going through the trauma, it couldn't be DX'ed as Post Tramatic Stress Disorder.....it was too soon for that DX.

What I am trying to get across is that in my opinion, I would try to focus on the most important things in your life, one thing at a time. I would put the stress of thinking that you are in the relaps of schizophrenia into the way back part of your mind. Once you get more settled into your new life of being husband, father, & career person, then if your symptoms don't go away after your life settles into a pattern, that would be the time when you need to go after help to deal with those issues. Of course, one very important issue would be that if your symptoms end up much worse & get in the way of your daily family & work life, that would be the time to deal with it immediately. Sometimes the more we worry about something, the worse it gets too. It is important to put the things in your life into perspective & like my pdoc constantly tells me.....take care of 1 thing at a time as much as you can....that us usually when things fall into place & usually our worse fears don't happen when we live our lives priortizing the things in our lives.

I know that I am not a qualified pdoc & my response is based on some of the experiences I have had in my 53 years of life (the last 12 are the only ones where I have delt with my psychological issues but no schizophrenia issues). I hope that maybe something might help you a little if possible.

Welcome to Psych Central.....there are many people here who have had much more experience with your issues.....& I am sure they will be responding to your post. I hope that what you are going through is just anxiety & that everything will end up great for you. Good luck with all you are doing & relax & enjoy being a daddy. You have alot going on in your life & anxiety with trying to move up at work is definitely stressful.

Best wishes to you,
Debbie

Okay. I am going to contact my psychiatrist from before. Let him know the changes that have happened, see what he thinks. I was hospitalized before for the schizophrenia, which is why I am worried about it.though, my previous doctor warned me that it may return full fledged, so I am thinking I may want to seek a second unbiased opinion from a completely different doctor.

Kyle

I appreciate the responses. I do. I was getting quite worried about it because when I was taken off meds and life was going smoothly, I thought it was out of my life for good. Then when those things started happening again, it was all too familiar of the hell I lived through for almost 2 years. Just worried because it's really something I don't want to deal with again, specially when I am having so much to deal with already.

Also, after you mentioning the anxiety possibility it does make sense, with everything being so new and the whole work situation, I have noticed sleep issues. One or two nights a week, I have had problems sleeping. And, as the night goes on I get more worried about having to work in the morning and having not slept, so I end up going one or two days without a good night of sleep. This lack of sleep may also be a contributing factor. I guess it's something I should mull over with a doctor who can look at the situation from the outside in. I am going to schedule an appointment, and I will post the results when I get them. :-)

Kyle

I rhink you're doing the right thing in seeing a pdoc about this. I hope you find the help you are looking for. Being able to treat what you are experiencing is the important thing. Let us know what you find out.

Sounds like you've already gotten good advice. Stress makes everything worse. Good luck with your old doc. Diagnosing is such an art. So many bits to track. ..

Kaarst . . . take care of you *hugs*

I am glad you can see a psychiatrist soon to lay your fears to rest. There are many things that could be causing this for you. I would start by keeping a log of things you feel are odd or different and when they occur so that you can share that with the doc. I would also recommend a general health care check up. Are you getting head aches? I can't make the right words when I am in migraine mode. All of these things are steps in the right direction. I wanted to add that you seem to be a very responsible 20 year old. Keep at this so you are the one in the driver's seat and can control your life. Good luck.

Hi Kyle,

You absolutely are doing the right thing in going to a dr to see what is happening with you. Stress can trigger our illnesses to come out of remission. Please let us know what the dr says.

Welcome to PC.

Cheers,

Jan

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
understanding the mechanisms leading to language disturbances in schizophrenia - such as formal thought disorder and poverty of speech - and the ways in which deficits in specific cognitive processes, prefrontal cortex (PFC), and/or dopamine may contribute to these symptoms. Numerous lines of research now implicate a dysfunction of both PFC and dopamine in schizophrenia. Recently, it has been hypothesized that reduced PFC activity, due to a reduction in dopaminergic tone, may play a role in "working memory" deficits in schizophrenia. Working memory refers to the ability to temporarily store and maintain information.

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Going off medication is one of the main reasons schizophrenics find it increasingly more difficult to communicate, imo. Schizophrenia doesn't "go away" so it can't "come back" as you fear. I hope you will see your doctor, and take his advice, and the medication. Then you will be able to work on your communication skills and feel more confident. TC!