[Saintly]

I'm scared and I have always been too wary of discrimination (with jobs, etc.) to tell my doctor, but I do want to be honest somewhere.

Is it really, really bad to hear mumbling and whispering (not everyday, but sometimes)? Too sometimes feel surreal (like I am in a Dali painting or in the music video for Black Hole Sun)? Too occasionally see shadow-people? Too get swept up in odd beliefs that pass (like for a while I though this guy I was talking to online was reading my mind, so I stopped talking to him, but later decided that I was probably imagining it? To have trouble deciding what really happened and what was just imagined? While being an eccentric, moody and sullen, withdrawn-type loner?

I am afraid that other people think I am crazy. I am afraid that I am not insane, but balancing on the precipice between normality and madness.

I use to have straight up strange thinking (I was constantly and terrifyingly obsessed with the idea of the world ending), but that cleared up when I started on a small dose of Abilify, for my anxiety.

[IowaFarmGal]

Hello Saintly! Welcome to Psych Central! We have a lot of people with a lot of different struggles so you will find a forum that understands and can support you. It's anonymous here so you should feel free to talk. Doctors and therapist also are bound by confidentiality and I think you should not be afraid to let the person prescribing know that the med had helped you with more than just anxiety. Maybe it would help them know how to help you better. I hope you find it helpful here.

[hamster-bamster]

The original purpose of Abilify was anti-psychotic, and what you describe is sort of a mild psychosis, so if that resolved with the addition of Abilify, it makes sense. I definitely agree with IowaFarmGal that your doctor would not disclose your confidential information to your employer or prospective employer.

Maybe all you need is upping the dose of Abilify a bit. But you need a doctor for that. And the doctor needs to know your symptoms.