[harrietshuman]

well its been difficult. My father has boderline personality disorder def trace of schizoaffective bipolar type. I understand allot of things isnt his fault, but boy has my life been hard and confusing since myself with a mental problem (schizoaffective) needless to say one day I am the best daughter in the world and next I am a piece of crap my mother made. One day everything is okay the next its a living nightmare. Thank goodness I don't live with him anymore, but I do have siblings that do. I don't understand my life, don't understand the things I have been thru because of the mental illness's in my family. I know it has been very hard and just at times don't know what to say or do with him. If I walk away from his rants, its very bad, If I stay and listen to him its even worse because of the things he says. He doesn't care that he hurts people and hardly even remembers his outbursts. Just tired of it. don't know what to do anymore. I know I got issues and I can't help it and I understand that sometimes I confuse those that love me and don't want them out of my life. So I am sure he feels the same way with his problems, just man .. so hard to deal with. exhausted !!

[Leed]

Bless your heart -- I'm sure it IS hard to deal with him. It's hard enough having your own mental issues, let alone having to deal with a parent who has one too.

Is your father under the care of a therapist? Are YOU under a therapist's care? If not, you should be.

If you're NOT in therapy, see if you can get into therapy. Have your doctor refer you to a good therapist. If your dad has insurance that covers you, it might cover mental health too. Ask him about it.

I don't know how old you are -- if you're still in school, talk to your school counselor. He/she will understand and can help. You need someone to talk to and badly. So give it a try, okay? And if you'd like to just "talk" you can message me anytime. I'd be happy to listen, okay? I'm a great listener.

Take care, and keep us posted on how you're doing okay? Hugs, Lee

[Travelinglady]

My mother was narcissistic with some borderline tendencies and I never knew what would please her. It is tough being raised by any parent with mental illness. They do their best, I would hope, but their illness does tend to come out in the parenting.

I have been in years of therapy, having developed some borderline tendencies myself. (My mother would threaten to leave us by joking about "going away with the bears.") That still felt like possible abandonment to a little kid. I am now no longer considered BPD, but then I developed bipolar disorder!

I do also recommend getting therapy, if you haven't. Of course, my mother wouldn't get any...... I also put both my sons in therapy, since I wasn't the healthiest mother myself.