Disability - Do People Judge You?

I don't really feel judged by it. In fact while being on disabiliy I was allowed to even work up to a certain amount. But I cannot handle a high stressed job. The only time someone ever said anything to me about being on disability and he was being sarcastic, you;re lucky to get a "nut check". So now that is what I call it. I get a nut check every month and am not ashamed of it. Thank God I get it. I am not working now but am looking for part time work. If you are on SSI you can't work. SSDI you can make up to another 1100.00 and not lose your benefits.

Hey Silent Void,
Listen, your right
people do judge you being
on disability. I wish I could
be optimistic on that one.
But its true.
I feel the reason people do this could be:
These people are resentful, in their mindset these folks might be thinking
"Here I have to work & this person doesn't have to"
Or
"Why don't these people on disability get out & find a job"?
And, I feel that these same folks? Just don't have a clue about our situations
which vary from each individual disabled person.
Speaking from my experience? I've had many jobs and from looking back on what I've experienced, I wasn't working out or I wasn't a real good fit.
And, the folks I worked with to include former supervisors knew somewhere in their minds that there was something missing about me, and they felt real uncomfortable dealing with how I came across or whatever.
So I wouldn't last long.
On jobs that I did last on? Sooner or later the stress would really get to me & I would just lose it.
For example during a grueling 8hr shift at a drycleaners I used to work at I was working once a week every week without ANY break whatsoever.
So one day after having all these customer clothes orders I just started banging with my fists on the counter, then tried to punch the computer.
Basically what the good majority of folks don't understand? Is that the disability benefits we are on aren't just awarded at random a lot of thought & decision making go into awarding any one person disability. Its thoroughly investigated.
For me? I had went before a JUDGE when it came to making that final decision & even he said that it was clear that I needed to be on it. To me that said a lot, because Judges are a real tough bunch to convince of anything and they are not shy to tell you about yourself. I'm sure you watch TV fiction or non fiction, Judges can see through the B.S.
So, you'll just have to roll with the punches.
And you may want to keep that your on disability to yourself.
What I usually say to people (and since I'm isolated it hasn't been an issue)
You can say I'm in school fulltime & I volunteer or something like that.
If you want to.
In these economic times its not unusual to be in school.
Its up to you.
I mean if it comes up in conversation or your meeting someone new.
Hey you never know it could happen.
I'm not encouraging you to lie, but sometimes one might need to spin a positive story based on whats going on in your life to add so that your not stigmatized.
If that makes any sense.
I'm preparing to go to school in the Fall.
I'm sorry that the Tax person made you feel awful about yourself.
That person was just ignorant.
Cause no one should judge another person!
As long as were good people, and not hurting someone?
There should never be any room for being judgemental.
Unfortunately other people will form a negative opinion about you
no matter what.
It happens to just about everyone out here in the World.
Even to the rich & famous don't escape this.
So, just work on your self esteem.
Don't care what others think.
It's THEIR problem & not yours.
I hope this helps.

Never mind.

I'm no longer on SSI because my husband's income exceeds the limit. It stopped when we got married. But I used to be on it, so I understand.

Especially when the disability is mental, yes, we do get judged. "Why, if anyone has reason to be depressed, I do. I have this problem and that problem, but I don't let it get me down. I *choose* to be happy!" Even worse, I've been told I'm not a real Christian, or else I wouldn't have problems with depression and anxiety. Jesus would have delivered me from them. So yes, I'd call that the definition of judging.

Edited to add: "Has a bird"? I've never heard that expression before. Gee, I wonder why I would be drawn to it. Is that like "having a cow"?

I know how you feel it is hard to be stuck in a shell of who you used t to be. Try

Well, you *can* work and still earn SSI, but it isn't worth it. By the time you factor in work-related expenses and the meager benefits crumbs that are tossed your way, oh, and you'll probably lose food stamp bennys, well, then it becomes crystal clear that you have two options: $710/mth. in SSI + food stamps or you can eat your worthless boot straps after tugging on them vigorously doesn't yield poverty-busting results.

Feck my fecking sociopathic government and their draconian SSI rules. No wonder people judge the disabled so harshly when our own government's approach to disability is to mete out punishment for getting sick.

Why wasn't I born a Swede?!? *shakes fist at sky for being born in a virulently capitalistic country*

As for suffering the slings and arrows of those not employed by the U.S. gov'mt, sure, I've been judged for having an invisible disability. I've gotten flack from family and former friends. I've been asked why I'm not working, I've been told I need to get a job, and I'm constantly barraged by my mother's "helpful advice", i.e. all kinds of alternative medicine goobledegook (no offense to those who are into alt. med. - I kind of am, too, but I'm highly selective about what I'll try). And then I'm peppered with accusations of "wanting to be sick" whenever I tell her I've looked into it and it's just not for me.

I guess maybe the latter is more magical thinking + control freak behavior than judgment, but it feels really judgy.

I try to preempt strangers' judgment by flashing them my approximation of a Puss-in-Boots expression whenever I tell them I'm disabled. http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-o5Pu1rMxxT...xpression.jpeg
I either look genuinely pathetic or genuinely insane, but it works

i thought disability would change many things cause ill be getting in extra money without having to stress myself and guaranteed medical insurance while on it and other stuff but...its just worse. it really is. i mean no stress from working and i get money and i will soon get insurance but....ill get treated worse in a mental hospital if i go to one on govt medical insurance i know that for a fact. private vs govt insurance they will treat u different. and then stigma from family and society.

just more and more stuff.
id thought id get more help but i find out its even harder for me too cause so many people on govt assistance have mental health issues so they take up caseworkers loads. leaving people like me out

and just more and more and more...

I've had, in the past, psychiatrists and therapists gently suggest that I consider a short-term stay in the hospital. I looked at them like we were sitting on the wrong ends of the desk That's simply not going to happen unless under the most dire of circumstances because, like you, I know the score. It's a hardship just finding p-docs and t-docs that accept Medicaid, let alone good ones. I don't even want to think about the incompetents I'd be forced to work with in an institutional setting.

But I'm getting all doom and gloom. Things might be far more optimistic wherever you are. Just ignore the raving cynic in the thread.

Recently, within the last month, my psych suggested I voluntarily hospitalize for my voices. I declined. I hate that feeling of being behind a door I didn't lock. You never know if they'll keep you against your will.

Never again. It was a cruel, cruel experience. The place itself was very nice and the staff were very professional, but the fact that I couldn't leave was very distressing and detrimental to my recovery.

Careful what you wish for. In Sweden you can ONLY get disability for life long illness. If the illness can in theory be cured (like anxiety, depression and some cancers), you cannot get disability. Unless you fight for years.

And you do not get the time off to recover from your illness, if it can be cured in the future, it means you work NOW.

If there is no place wanting you, you get put in a work program. First of it you go to meetings and if that doesn't help, you are placed in a workplace where you do full time without pay. You probably live off welfare which doesn't cover your basic needs. You have no union, no vacation, no safety rules, but you work. Day in day out. Being sick you say? Doesn't matter. You work. Those who cannot take it, yea you can only guess what happens.

That is Sweden of today.

People that Judge you are only feeling insecure about themselve. They think you are getting something they are not. Little do they know that you are probably having more problems than they ever experienced in there life. Ignore people. I walk through crowds, store, etc. with my head held high and only focus on the people I am with at the time. If I am alone with my Service Dog we both ignore everyone, even if they come over to speak to us. I do not own anyone an excuse or reason that I am disabled to I just walk away as if I didn't hear them.

You don't own anyone an explanation about your life. After all you don't go poking your nose into their lives. LOL! One day a kid tried to pet my dog and I reached over and petted him on the head, no explanation required. LOL!

My problem is I look to friendly!!!! But I let anyone interfere with my day.

I'm not on disability yet, but I have had people judge me about it. And two of the people who judged me the most are on disability themselves!