Differences: Psychiatric diagnoses and physica ones.

100+1685=1785 at 4:28pm: A major reason I count breaths or use my other 2 methods of breath awareness is to remind myself to shut up, not talk as much, even to think for the length of one breath before I speak. Unconsciously, but somewhat consciously, I have controlled my manic genes all my life. Manics tend to talk far too much. Mother's side: an uncle, full fledged manic depressive. Perhaps his father as well. Luckily I only got the manic genes and my 2 hospitalizations were for manic episodes despite the diagnosis of the psychiatrist of schizophrenia in 1971.

535+1785=2320 at 7:55pm: Had a drink, almost a cup of 13.5% red wine, and felt it a bit for a while. I do enjoy the feeling 1 oz. of alcohol gives me. Lasts, oh, maybe a half hour. The US Dept. of Health recommends 1 or 2 drinks a day for us old folks. Research shows that those who have 2 and stop, live longer than teetotalers. I get both enjoyment healthier. Can't do better than that. And it, me, makes me happy.

Getting late. It's been a good, very happy day. I've made it so in ways I have mentioned. Hope some readers have done the same.

Genes do make a difference, but we all have to work with what we're born with. I have noted that some babies come out smiling, others crying and even looking fairly sad. I'm sure some percentage of that is genetic. Hasta manana, which mean til tomorrow..

595 at 4:47am on 6/4/13, a Tuesday: Just up and am on my 1st cup, hot tea, not decaffeinated. Woke about 2 after 5 hours sleep. Counted 595 breaths, engaged in fantasies, and I interested myself in other activities I hesitate to write about. I do know it's safe to write about insomnia, so I'll do that.

775 at 5:29am: Now to check out a few of the new members. Replied to Katie Jane. I still have a lot of trouble with this website. I may be a slow learner. Or it could be the site is poorly designed. Anyone have an opinion?

1140 at 7:04am: Did a few things while counting breaths, but now: Insomnia: My definition: Trying to go to sleep when your body and mind don't want to. My cure: Stop fighting yourself. Enjoy lying in bed. Pay attention to your body. Get it and you in as comfortable a position as possible. Then let your mind do whatever it wants to. I have read that lying relaxed and awake in bed gives as much, or almost as much rest as being asleep. If you want to control your mind a bit, call up a pleasant fantasy with your eyes closed. See if pictures of it start to appear in your mind. If they do, great. You might go straight from the fantasy into a dream. This works for me.

Different people need different amounts of sleep. I'm retired and can sleep as much or as little as I want and when I want. I can do whatever I want all the time. Even though you may not be retired, you're doing exactly what you want every minute as well. You may tell yourself you're not, but you are. We all make choices breath by breath. A lot of these are automatic. We're not even aware of making them. But we/I can choose to do something entirely different right now. I could walk out the front door and never come back here. I'd be a damn fool if I did, so I want to stay where I am. You could too. If you don't, your choice, you're doing what you want.

Thousands, I don't know the average number per day, walk out every day. Mostly they're men, but with women's lib, more and more women do it. Some even leave their children behind with their husband or parents and disappear. Sometimes forever. Sometimes after a while, they---both men and women, choose to come back.

Enjoy what you're doing. After all, my mother told me, "You don't have to do anything. 7:30am 1141, 1142....

285+1140=1425 at 8:21am: My daughter came out and I interrupted my counting. Then after a bit started again. Time to get my own breakfast---cereal and juice. 250+1425=1675 at 8:53am. Finished breakfast. 12:46pm: Up from an early nap. A quiet pleasant day. Siri's car is gone. 1426, 1427...1654. I just wrote and posted a reply to a newcomer to PychC. 3:40pm: 330+1675=2005. One day I counted more than 3700 breaths. Seems ridiculous but I'm very happy, and "The perfected yogi is aware of every breath." Why does this work?

A major reason is it at least partially blocks out thinking, talking to one's self. While such talk can be positive, be self enhancing, for many it is the opposite. They talk themselves into staying depressed. I think I've said that before, but anything worth saying is probably worth saying more than once.

3:49. No posts except mine on this topic today. Oh well.
Interesting how reluctant people are to reveal themselves. That may be a sensible goal of psychiatric treatment: to move people from being afraid to reveal themselves to a point where they are confident enough to do so. 2006, 2007...2400 at 4:45pm. 2900 at 6:04pm

:Have been watching, and enjoying the cooking program, Chopping Block. Mouth watering a bit. Soon I expect to be eating dinner. Reheated my lunch, not as good as it was on the first round. Ah well. At times leftovers are better than the first round. Some OJ will be good while I'm waiting. Enough counting breaths for the moment...

6/5/13---8:20am---Wednesday: An exciting morning so far, and not all pleasurable. But I've enjoyed every minute of it. I think anyone who wants to can learn to enjoy themselves.

My dog, Spike threw up all over the place and my sister was cleaning up the mess when I got up. That done, she's now off with Tiana, a dental apptmt for the latter.. And Spike has recovered completely from whatever he ate that made him sick. He just rushed out the door, tail up, to join Kiwi, Tiana's dog in barking at something. My worry and concern for him is over. I've apologized to Siri for him. And I'm smiling. A very interesting way to start a morning. And tiring. But I'm resting easily in my lounge chair, am on ,my 2nd cup of liquid, coffee. I had an easy one push BM already. My life so far today couldn't have been better!!

Pills and breakfast soon. And checking on newcomers to this website, whether anyone has replied here, specifically to me. I even, sporadically managed to count 200 breaths. Now, 201, 202...278 at 8:51am...9:21am No replies, did a reply to divorceddad0705. Now cereal, or wait and see if Siri will be cooking a breakfast after Tiana's apptmt? 279,280...Damn, lost count entirely, but did a reply to biggamehunter87 on Psych Central. 281, 282 and it's 9:57am...

life so far today couldn't have been better!!

Pills and breakfast soon. And checking on newcomers to this website, whether anyone has replied here, specifically to me. I even, sporadically managed to count 200 breaths. Now, 201, 202...278 at 8:51am...9:21am No replies, did a reply to divorceddad0705. Now cereal, or wait and see if Siri will be cooking a breakfast after Tiana's apptmt? 279,280...Damn, lost count entirely, but did a reply to biggamehunter87 on Psych Central. 281, 282 and it's 9:57am...

2:21pm: Finished lunch, enjoyed it even tho the ear of corn was not hot enough and was a day old, sausage was good as was the salad. My daughter is not the best of cooks, so it's good she brings in a lot of takeout. She did serve it to me, I was too dizzy every time I stood to do it myself. I appreciate her, everything she does for me, and it's a lot.

I amazed myself at how hard it is for me to keep my mouth shut. Counting breaths helps, but even in the midst of doing that, I gave Siri some advice I had made up my mind never to do again. She had a stock market program on the TV. I saw the price of gold and the price of the S&P average, and blurted out, "Time to sell stocks and buy gold." I've turned all my finances over to her. Was determined to keep my nose out. So much for determination. Now I'm determined to think at least 2 breaths before speaking. I had been enjoying responding spontaneously, and even initiating exchanges with Siri and Tiana all morning. Damn, at least 2 breaths before initiating and perhaps, yes, it'd be a good idea to take two breaths before replying too. Play acting that "really slowed down old man" is probably my best course. Does anyone reading think spontaneity is a virtue? If so please tell me why. Of course, I've forgiven myself already. No one needs do that.

1:04pm: I've done a lot. Posted a bunch of replies to newcomers to Psych Central. Mostly I've been sitting in my lounge chair. Not worried about Spike who is mostly sleeping. On my 4th cup of liquid. Have enjoyed every minute, including some verbal play with Tiana and Siri, both of whom are far more serious about living and life than I am. Now...forgot my morning pills, and just took them... Posted

2:21pm: Finished lunch, enjoyed it even tho the ear of corn was not hot enough and was a day old, sausage was good as was the salad. My daughter is not the best of cooks, so it's good she brings in a lot of takeout. She did serve it to me, I was too dizzy every time I stood to do it myself. I appreciate her, everything she does for me, and it's a lot.

I amazed myself at how hard it is for me to keep my mouth shut. Counting breaths helps, but even in the midst of doing that, I gave Siri some advice I had made up my mind never to do again. She had a stock market program on the TV. I saw the price of gold and the price of the S&P average, and blurted out, "Time to sell stocks and buy gold." I've turned all my finances over to her. Was determined to keep my nose out. So much for determination. Now I'm determined to think at least 2 breaths before speaking. I had been enjoying responding spontaneously, and even initiating exchanges with Siri and Tiana all morning. Damn, at least 2 breaths before initiating and perhaps, yes, it'd be a good idea to take two breaths before replying too. Play acting that "really slowed down old man" is probably my best course. Does anyone reading think spontaneity is a virtue? If so please tell me why. Of course, I've forgiven myself already. No one needs do that.

At this point this thread has run its course. I will be closing this thread.

dps