[(JD)]

<font color="blue"> There are several of you here that are in what is considered an abusive relationship. Please know that you have members here at PC who care about you and wish you to be (and become forever) safe. I copy this here for you, and urge you to go to the website or call your local woman's shelter for better understanding of the situation you are in. </font>



Breaking the cycle: Difficult, but doable with help
Domestic violence is part of a continuing cycle that's difficult to break. If you're in an abusive situation, you may recognize this pattern:

Your abuser strikes using words or actions.
Your abuser may beg for forgiveness, offer gifts or promise to change.
Your abuser becomes tense, angry or depressed.
Your abuser promises to stop but repeats the abusive behavior.

Typically each time the abuse occurs, it worsens, and the cycle shortens. Breaking this pattern of violence alone and without help is difficult.

"When you live in an environment of chaos, stress and fear, you start doubting yourself and your ability to take care of yourself," says Patterson. "It can really unravel your sense of reality and self-esteem."

So it's important to recognize that you may not be in a position to resolve the situation on your own. You may need outside help, and that's OK. Without help, the abuse will likely continue. Leaving the abusive relationship may be the only way to break the cycle.

Blurb from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/dom...olence/WO00044

National Domestic Violence Hotline
United States Department of Justice: Domestic Violence
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence

[(JD)]

http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/10/...-victims-stay/

[JustAPixie]

[mssumom]

I did read through everything that you posted and see myself in sooooooo many things. Do you know that the system here (maybe everywhere idk) won't charge him for domestic abuse (will probably never charge him with anything even if he kills me the way it looks to me) because we are divorced and live in separate residences?
anyway, enough about my sorry life, just wanted to say thank you for bringing up such an important issue. My hope is that someone here reading it will realize and try and get help.

Thanks again ((((((((((Sky)))))))))

[(JD)]

(((((hugs)))) I'm glad that at least you no longer live with the abuser! I hope you have taken all precautions to keep him at bay (including taking self defense courses.) You can heal... you are not what that person said you were.



Most ppl don't realize that what they put up with is NOT NORMAL!!!! It isn't until they break away, and begin to heal that they realize good life and people.