[wushuduck]

I didn't know where to put this thread because I don't know what condition this comes under, sorry if this is the wrong section or anything.

So, does anyone else get unwanted ruminating thoughts? Almost like when you have a song stuck in your head; thoughts that go round and round your mind, sometimes they are so bad they even overpower your actual thoughts and you can't focus on anything. This only happens to me occasionally though, and it's been a while since it last happened but I was just wondering what they were and if anyone else gets them?

I don't know if I've explained it well enough but hopefully you get what I mean

[Smellyfinger]

Yea I do. I constantly think of the bad things I've done or said in my past. It starts shortly after I wake up and goes until I go to sleep. I can't focus on anything because every little thing will remind me of something negative then those thoughts take over.

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[TRNRMOM]

Originally Posted by Twigg

I didn't know where to put this thread because I don't know what condition this comes under, sorry if this is the wrong section or anything.

So, does anyone else get unwanted ruminating thoughts? Almost like when you have a song stuck in your head; thoughts that go round and round your mind, sometimes they are so bad they even overpower your actual thoughts and you can't focus on anything. This only happens to me occasionally though, and it's been a while since it last happened but I was just wondering what they were and if anyone else gets them?

I don't know if I've explained it well enough but hopefully you get what I mean

i absolutely know what u r talking about and i've been diagnosed for more than 35 yrs. with bipolar 2…racing/ruminating thoughts mainly at bedtime which kept me awake and no anti-and. or even ambient would stop the racing…only 1/2 of a 25mg. seroquel knocks me out and gives me the deepest sleep w/really weird dreams but i sleep thru the nite w/o the racing/ruminating thoughts.

Absolutely. Yes. Ruminating thoughts drive me mad. I'm diagnosed with bipolar 2. Seroquel has helped calm my thoughts, at least to quite an extent.

[FreeFall]

Originally Posted by Twigg

I didn't know where to put this thread because I don't know what condition this comes under, sorry if this is the wrong section or anything.

So, does anyone else get unwanted ruminating thoughts? Almost like when you have a song stuck in your head; thoughts that go round and round your mind, sometimes they are so bad they even overpower your actual thoughts and you can't focus on anything. This only happens to me occasionally though, and it's been a while since it last happened but I was just wondering what they were and if anyone else gets them?

I don't know if I've explained it well enough but hopefully you get what I mean

I think this is what is happening to me. I feel so stuck in the past. I'm 57 years old, and everything that happens in the present seems to remind me of the bad things that happened when I was 7 or 17 or 27 or whenever.

I came from a very chaotic childhood, jumped right into an abusive marriage immediately out of high school, had three children, got divorced and then got involved with a man who always kept me guessing - was I in or was I out (aka, was I good enough or wasn't I?). I played that for NINE years before I packed up lock, stock and 3 kids and moved 600 miles away to start over.

Suddenly, I guess I was "good enough" because the guy followed me and convinced me to marry him.

All my life I've felt that I've been doing the work of 2 people, like living my life in double time. I had to be the mom to my mom's kids, the father to my ex-husband's kids, and eventually the owner of a business I worked for owned by a relative. From the moment I moved closer to this relative and went to work FOR her, she basically retired. I did everything, she took all the credit. Every family get together was at my house at my expense. The family didn't notice because I'd always been the Surrogate Mom and did everything for them. I wore myself out and still kept going.

Now I'm in poor health, my mind won't leave me alone, I fear my husband is gaslighting me so that he can get away with things and tell me I'm wrong because I must be crazy.

I take Alprazolam and Trazadone every day. I was on Wellbutrin XL 300 mg daily, but I finally stopped because of the side effect, and for now am not on an antidepressant. I can't leave my home because of my anxiety. I put an app on my husband's phone so I could see where he is and all it proved is that he IS the liar I think he is, so I deleted the app because I was driving myself nuts with it.

There's so much more, but it's hard to write it all down and make sense of it. Bottom line: I am neutralized. I can't work, can't socialize, my house is a wreck, my relationship leaves me cold, and I cry more than I ever have in my life. Some days I feel I want to dig the anxiety out of my gut with a garden trowel.

My mind never stops, never stops. I know I need help, but I have no clue where to start.

I'd love to hear from others who are in a mess like this, or think they are, or who have escaped a mess like this. Thanks for listening.

[popsie]

Hi freefall, you sound exhausted. or maybe its just me feeling exhausted from listening to your description of your life. sounds like a lot on your plate.

your anxiety is wearing you down probably. you deserve to feel better. have you shared your feelings with anyone? husband, family member, friend? therapist? you sound really overwhelmed.

sometimes vocalizing and sharing the load can really help.

sounds like you are a very strong woman, and you have accomplished a lot, so don't forget that. and sounds to me like you have earned a meltdown, lucky you! so take care of yourself, I hope you feel better soon.

Hugs from Ontario Canada