[Olanza-what?]

1st
When strange things first started happening to me, doctors said it was “Altered Mental State”. I of course looked it up. Unfairly, it had multiple meanings. So, I got to choose which one best suited me. Of course, I choose seizure activity. After a year of living with a somewhat self-diagnosis the strange activity continued, as a matter of fact, it got worse. Here is a small list of the crap that was/is happening to me:

Seeing color spectrum – green, blue, yellow and red
Objects moving towards me
Electrical shock shooting up my left side
Left arm and leg moving spontaneously
Feeling like I’m falling off a cliff or going down a roller coaster
Loosing time
Not knowing how I got to a particular place
Seeing more things that aren’t there than normal (I’ve always seen ghost)
Feeling like I’ve been unplug (suddenly loosing all my energy
And the worse of them all
Feeling like the earth was pulling me underground

2nd
I have always been depressed, but it got worse after brain aneurysm. It got so bad that I ended up in hospital for a few weeks. While in the hospital I was diagnosed as having anxiety, Schizoaffective disorder with major depression and bipolar 1.
Of course, I researched all of these and found that the symptoms/issues are similar to altered mental state and simple partial complex seizures. Well that the f---! I’m all messed the heck up. I don’t know if I am coming or going, seeing or sleeping, laughing or crying, living or dying?

It seems to me that I have both schizophrenia and seizures. The medicines I take treat both. This is making me absolutely crazy. It’s no wonder that I spend most of my time thinking of ways to get out of it all. I’m trying very cautiously to not use the wrong words because I need to be heard. I need to hear from others diagnosed like me, or someone who could with out a doubt erase that thin line between the two. I don’t want to choose either of these. Right now? This very moment? My heart is trying to jump out of my chest, and I find it difficult to swallow. My heart is beating so freaking loud it sounds like I’m in the jungles of Africa. I don’t think no pill can fix this. Do you?

So what is it? Schizophrenia, Anxiety, Bipolar, Seizures? Or do I have em all?

Sweet Jesus, what is wrong with me? And can you please fix it now!

Originally Posted by Olanza-what?

1st
When strange things first started happening to me, doctors said it was “Altered Mental State”. I of course looked it up. Unfairly, it had multiple meanings. So, I got to choose which one best suited me. Of course, I choose seizure activity. After a year of living with a somewhat self-diagnosis the strange activity continued, as a matter of fact, it got worse. Here is a small list of the crap that was/is happening to me:

Seeing color spectrum – green, blue, yellow and red
Objects moving towards me
Electrical shock shooting up my left side
Left arm and leg moving spontaneously
Feeling like I’m falling off a cliff or going down a roller coaster
Loosing time
Not knowing how I got to a particular place
Seeing more things that aren’t there than normal (I’ve always seen ghost)
Feeling like I’ve been unplug (suddenly loosing all my energy
And the worse of them all
Feeling like the earth was pulling me underground

2nd
I have always been depressed, but it got worse after brain aneurysm. It got so bad that I ended up in hospital for a few weeks. While in the hospital I was diagnosed as having anxiety, Schizoaffective disorder with major depression and bipolar 1.
Of course, I researched all of these and found that the symptoms/issues are similar to altered mental state and simple partial complex seizures. Well that the f---! I’m all messed the heck up. I don’t know if I am coming or going, seeing or sleeping, laughing or crying, living or dying?

It seems to me that I have both schizophrenia and seizures. The medicines I take treat both. This is making me absolutely crazy. It’s no wonder that I spend most of my time thinking of ways to get out of it all. I’m trying very cautiously to not use the wrong words because I need to be heard. I need to hear from others diagnosed like me, or someone who could with out a doubt erase that thin line between the two. I don’t want to choose either of these. Right now? This very moment? My heart is trying to jump out of my chest, and I find it difficult to swallow. My heart is beating so freaking loud it sounds like I’m in the jungles of Africa. I don’t think no pill can fix this. Do you?

So what is it? Schizophrenia, Anxiety, Bipolar, Seizures? Or do I have em all?

Sweet Jesus, what is wrong with me? And can you please fix it now!

I could go through all of the symptoms you listed and say: this is a hallucination, this is a delusion, this might be nerve damage, etc. But I don't think that will help you. Since it's well-established that thoughts lead to feelings and feelings lead to behaviors, I'd rather focus on thoughts.

Let's say I draw a circle. Then I draw a vertical line on the extreme right side of the circle. Then I draw a vertical line on the extreme left side of the circle. The space between the right vertical line and the border of the circle I'll call the "black" area. The space between the left vertical line and the border of the circle I'll call the "white" area. The space between the two vertical lines I'll call the "grey" area. The circle is a metaphor for life. Thus, most of life is in the grey area. Life is not exclusively black or white. Now, I have experienced almost all of the symptoms that you listed. I believe that every human being is unique. So I don't think you can view your symptoms (or my symptoms) as John Doe v USA. It's not a lawsuit. In my case, I believe my symptoms are a result of a synergy of genetics, environment, illogical thinking, and other factors that I simply do not know.

So, I don't think the answer is pure schizophrenia, nor do I think the answer is pure Simple Complex Partial Seizures. Your answer is probably in the grey area. But I don't know.

[Olanza-what?]

I see the grey area way more than the black or white area. My whole life is murky right now. I can see the seizures starting after the aneurysm, but the other stuff? Because my life is grey is perhaps why they can't find the right meds to make all of this (or me) go away.

I appreciate your insight, it gave me something to think about. thank you!

[SnakeCharmer]

Olanza, I have a lot of experience -- both personal and professional -- with people who have both simple partial seizures and partial complex seizures.

In partial seizures, the changed electrical activity doesn't impact the whole brain, just a portion or a partial part of the brain. The symptoms depend on which part of the brain is being stimulated by wayward electrical impulses. People having partial seizures usually do not convulse and, in fact, other people may not be aware you're having a seizure. They may think you're suddenly acting a little odd, but unless they know what to look for, they don't think it's a seizure.

Every one of the symptoms you listed -- every single one -- is a known symptom of simple and complex partial seizures. In simple seizures, the person may have an altered state of consciousness and they remain aware of the odd activity that's happening. In complex seizures, the person may not remember what happened and they may suffer a blackout period after the seizure is over in which they look as if they're all there and functioning, but they may not regain normal consciousness for several hours. That would explain losing time and not knowing how you got to a particular place.

Partial seizures can cause hallucinations of any of the sense -- taste, smell, sight, sound, touch and movement. You mentioned visual hallucinations -- colors and objects moving toward you. Seeing ghosts. Many people with partial seizures see ghostly images or faces.

However, you didn't mention auditory hallucinations, like voices. Most schizophrenic hallucinations are auditory in nature. Very rarely are they visual. Seizures can cause a roaring in the ears like a freight train, a tinkling of bells, high pitched tones and even musical notes. But not usually voices giving commands.

Arms and legs moving suddenly are also classic motor seizure activity. The feeling of falling, with the stomach feeling as if it's rising and falling, and of your entire body being pressed or crushed or sucked into the earth are regularly reported.

Partial seizures also cause what neurologists call "mood storms." A sudden change of mood sweeps over the person -- it can be anything. Anxiety, rage, terror, deep sorrow, joy, sex. Religious feelings bordering on frenzy are common. These mood storms are caused by simple partial seizures, but they come on and change so unpredictably that people suffering seizure-triggered mood swings are often misdiagnosed as bi-polar.

When a seizure is over, a person usually loses all energy (feeling unplugged.) They may go into a deep sleep lasting several hours. This is called the post-ictal phase.

You've had a brain aneurysm. That would be enough to cause a person to start experiencing simple and partial complex seizures.

They can be hard to diagnose because the person does not convulse. They may act strange at unpredictable times, but they don't fit the standard idea of seizures. It's hard for doctors to diagnose because by the time the person gets to the doctor, the seizure is usually over.

You explained your symptoms quite well. It's common for people to feel much emotional turmoil when talking about their symptoms and they report much of what they experience cannot be put into words. This can cause doctors who have no special training in seizure disorders to think of the seizure patient as difficult or mentally ill, when the patient is actually displaying classic symptoms of what used to be called temporal lobe epilepsy and is now called simple and complex partial seizures.

You probably need to see a neurologist. If the meds you're taking are supposed to treat both seizures and mental disorders, you may need a different anti-convulsant or more than one seizure medication. Finding a combo of meds to bring the seizures under control can be trial and error and somewhat difficult. But very worth the effort.

All of your symptoms are similar to the symptoms of simple and partial complex seizures. They are not particular common to schizophrenia. And, of course, it's also possible to have both a seizure disorder and a mental health issue at the same time. Many people do.

I hope you will ask your primary care provider or psychiatrist or therapist to arrange a referral to a neurologist. You may need an EEG or other brain wave test and an MRI or CT scan. Because you've had an aneurysm it just makes sense to look for a neurological cause of your symptoms before assuming it's all psychiatric in nature.

You described your symptoms well. If you took that list of symptoms, plus information about the brain aneurysm, a neurologist would know how to proceed to properly diagnose and treat you.

I wish you the best and hope you will come back and tell us how this goes for you.

[shezbut]

Ask your neurologist.

Having both a psychological disorder as well as a physical brain disorder is a bit complicated. They can have similar symptoms, depending upon the part of the brain being impacted, but your neurologist ought to be able to give a much better idea to you as to what YOU are experiencing than we might.

I do have extensive personal experience with complex partial seizures, as I do have epilepsy and this type is my "normal seizure type"... but, that doesn't not mean that I feel comfortable telling you that you are experiencing x,y, and z. I'm sorry. But, a professional really should be seen with your Q's!

[Olanza-what?]

Originally Posted by SnakeCharmer

Olanza, I have a lot of experience -- both personal and professional -- with people who have both simple partial seizures and partial complex seizures.

You described your symptoms well. If you took that list of symptoms, plus information about the brain aneurysm, a neurologist would know how to proceed to properly diagnose and treat you.

I wish you the best and hope you will come back and tell us how this goes for you.

I have a neurologist as a matter of fact after I spent to weeks in a pysch ward, and they tried desperately to contact him regarding my meds and he refused/fell to reply I fired him and got a new one this summer.
Omg!!! You have made my day. I’m not crazy crazy, just crazy. There are other things. My lips and tongue get numb; it feels like my skin is crawling especially on my face. I smell smoke, ammonia or something that smells so bad it almost makes me gag; sometimes I smell lilac or gardenia, no one near me smells these things. I get very, very paranoid like something bad is going to happen. I have had fits of rage. I laugh and cry at the same time. Both sad feeling and happy feelings are simultaneously happening. That’s impossible. Now, I have heard voices, they don’t tell me what to do, they just call out my name.

The ringing and sirens in my ears got so bad that my primary doc sent me to an ENT and he said it was tinnitus. Also, objects bend (warp) and fold. When I drive in the early morning, or late evening, the white/yellow lines are raised off the ground. And most of the things that happen seem to happen between 7am and 11am, or 8pm and 10pm.

I stopped telling my (old) neuro doc and psych doc about the things that happen. I went in for an EEG this summer and my insurance would only pay for 2 days. My new neuro doc wanted to do 5 to 10 days to catch an episode. I have had 3 outpatient EEG’s and all were negative or inconclusive.

I have been on depakote, kepra, and a few other meds. The depakote worked the best, but I started loosing hair and gaining weight at an alarming rate. I thought it was also making me more depressed than normal.

I feel so much better. I don’t know how to thank you. Tears of joy are streaming down my cheeks.

Why won’t the doctors tell me that my symptoms are seizure related?
Why are they so quick to tell me that I am bipolar and schizophrenic?
How do I get them to see that I am not hallucinating?
I am depressed, deeply depressed I will admit that, and my family has a long line history of bipolar so perhaps these issues are magnified off the chart for me?

I am so glad I posted this. I started not to. I get so tired of telling people what’s going on only to have them stare back at me like a “GHOST”.

One more thing, my cognitive skills are declinning. I dont have addhd, but its like all of a sudden i cant do what I use to do nor can I stay focused for long periods of time. Im very forgetful, I get confused easily and of course I make a mess of my meds.

I am so grateful that you replied to my post. A ton of weight has just lifted up off my shoulders. THANK YOU!

[Olanza-what?]

Originally Posted by shezbut

Ask your neurologist.

Having both a psychological disorder as well as a physical brain disorder is a bit complicated. They can have similar symptoms, depending upon the part of the brain being impacted, but your neurologist ought to be able to give a much better idea to you as to what YOU are experiencing than we might.

I do have extensive personal experience with complex partial seizures, as I do have epilepsy and this type is my "normal seizure type"... but, that doesn't not mean that I feel comfortable telling you that you are experiencing x,y, and z. I'm sorry. But, a professional really should be seen with your Q's!

Thank you so much. I am glad that I posted this. After reading your comments it makes sense. I wish the doctors would stop jerking me around and just tell me these things. This is what triggers me, you know? It gets so bad sometimes I find myself screaming out lout litterally. Then the neighbors call the cops! I dont see my neuro doc until March 2015 and I am suppose to see neuro surgeon in 2015 as well. It's been a year since my last CT. I believe there are or is another aneurysm unruptured of course

I skipped all the posts below your main one so I can get right to expressing some thought. I deal with much of the symptoms you get on the schizo-side but do not have the Partial Seizures.

Not sure how long you have been dealing with delusions and less-than-normal thinking patterns, but I like you have dealt with these in various ways. My thinking has cleared up a lot, but I have a lot of fatigue now such as pain and worries about the past & near future.

Take it from me, that the #1 best thing you can do is try to stay cool and make sure you have good support such as parents or best friends.

If you want to talk anymore, I think it would be cool. You seem like your an interesting person. I think we could relate about a lot of stuff.

I hope I helped here. Inbox me if you want to further chat to investigate some of our symptoms together.