[20oney]

I've been down. So far down, for a couple of months. I've never in my life talked to anyone, about anything personal.
It just scares me.
The last couple of days, I've been really struggling. I just, I don't even know how I feel anymore.
I just feel so down I don't know which way up is. Is there even an up!?
I guess I should have listened to people, when you hear them say 'don't bottle things up' I now understand. I've run out of space, it's like it's all seeping out. Forming the big thick fog around me. I can't see past it.
I just wish there was someone who could crack me open. Someone to persist until I break. To push me to my limits.

I'm over it .

[sideblinded]

I am glad that you vented a little of it here. I hope that you can keep letting out your thoughts and feelings. Have you tried a journal? Could you talk with friends? Keep sharing as it will get easier as others can relate. Hope you feel better. ((hugs))

[peaceseeker63]

When you're so down, it is hard to see a way out. Start talking...start small and work your way to the important stuff. Start here...we will listen and support you (((HUGS)))

[BLUEDOVE]

May the GodForce be with you!

[20oney]

Originally Posted by sideblinded

I am glad that you vented a little of it here. I hope that you can keep letting out your thoughts and feelings. Have you tried a journal? Could you talk with friends? Keep sharing as it will get easier as others can relate. Hope you feel better. ((hugs))

I don't find journals to help.. And talking to friends, I've never found to be easy.. I've never found talking about anything easy..

[Jolisse]

How about a therapist?

[20oney]

Originally Posted by Jolisse

How about a therapist?

Mmmm see that makes me so anxious.. I would love to.. But.. Nope.

[Lantern]

20oney, start small. Admit to one small truth. That all it takes one small truth

[20oney]

Originally Posted by Lantern

20oney, start small. Admit to one small truth. That all it takes one small truth

1 small truth hey? Does that include, I hate talking about my feelings and emotions with anyone..? Well I guess I don't hate it.. More so I scares the crap out of me. I don't know why. But, It just makes me so scared. Which is why for my whole life, I have just bottled everything up.

[brackenbeard]

20oney I just want to say... on this site you'll find caring, and considerate people who respond meaningfully. Good luck, and stick around. There's people here who will hear you out.

[peaceseeker63]

Originally Posted by 20oney

1 small truth hey? Does that include, I hate talking about my feelings and emotions with anyone..? Well I guess I don't hate it.. More so I scares the crap out of me. I don't know why. But, It just makes me so scared. Which is why for my whole life, I have just bottled everything up.

I completely agree that it can fell scary and unsafe to share your feelings and emotions. For me, finding someone I trusted and who listened made all the difference, and I feel so much better sharing my burden.
This is a safe place to share if you ever feel like it

[Lady Courtesan]

Too true, my friends, too true.

I don't think any of us like letting all the dark things out-but sometimes you have to. And what better place than here? When I feel fried from the real world, I always come back and there is always at least one other soul who will take the time to listen.

Eventually you might reach a place where you feel like you can talk to a therapist. I had the same one for six years and I loved her-I did 90% of the talking, she didn't play any games and she let me figure things out for myself. I would still be with her if I hadn't been forced to use the VA.

In the meantime, let us shower you with love and hope and you can spill something once in a while when you feel okay with it.

Now it's time to-reward yourself! You were very brave today to share your feelings with us. So get a mani-pedi or a new outfit and don't forget chocolate is one of the four main food groups.

Best of luck, Lady M