[1234magnolia]

The other day when I was very down I posted a newbie post but it must be in cyberspace. It never made it to the forum.

Since that crappy day I have made a discovery and I think many of my issues center around abandonment issues. My mother was very unsure about how to handle a baby, Dr. Spock was her guidance, let the baby cry itself out. My father walked out on us when I was 13, and the list goes on and on. I learned to fear being abandoned and I feared it was because I didn't do something, like let my father rape me. Thankfully I screamed and adults came to my rescue.

anyway, 2 years of therapy never brought this issue to light. I happened to read about abandonment on this website and the flood gates opened. Now I have learn how to handle these memories and how to better my life.

[CANDC]

Welcome to Psych Central (PC) 1234magnolia. I am sorry to hear you have been suffering from memories of your past and abuse. No one should have to live through that.

Some people at PC will find a therapist will help them sort out the roots of their life. For me, childhood episodes waned in influence to the degree I released them and let go of the anger, the hope for a change of heart by the abuser, and urge for retribution or revenge. Letting go of these does not mean what you endured was right, it only means you finally decide to go on with your life and not be weighed down by these things anymore.

Many people find compassionate, caring people here at PC. Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

There are articles that go into more detail about coping
Psych Central - Search results for Surviving abuse

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

Well, these issues are coming to light now and they are very heavy and complex. Please don't deal with them on your own.

I suggest you find a new therapist, one whom you are comfortable talking with. Be sure to discuss these events and how they effect your long-term goals - e.g., intimate relationships, friendships. Discuss the harm the abandonment issues are creating for you now.

Keep posting! I wish you all the best.