[tristanisms]

I'm 17 and I've battled depression since my parents divorced 4 years ago, and I still am. Last year I really discovered that I had been depressed for that long. I spent a lot of my time watching good movies, playing computer games (especially horror games). However, for a while now, there aren't any forms of horror game, or movie that frighten me. On top of that, last week I went to Six Flags (an amusement park), and I discovered that I no longer possessed a fear of the roller coaster in that park. Before that I had only ridden a small, easy one. That day I road every single coaster there, and rode the largest twice. Not only did I not feel fear for these rides, but they barely gave me a thrill. In my mind, I figured "Maybe the biggest coaster in the country would do it". To me, this is strange behavior. I'd always been frightened by roller coasters, before I started playing horror games, even the slightest bit of a scare, would make me jump out of my chair. This is extremely disappointing to me, because I enjoyed the feeling of being scared (in those situations).

[Frankbtl]

Hi tristanisms,

Welcome to PC!!
And you know I wouldn't say it was strange behaviour, for me I'd see it as linked to the depression..........maybe a sense of apathy, maybe a sense of not "caring", maybe a numbing of your emotions/feelings, maybe a loss of interest............all things that can come along with depression.
But it is good that you're trying to still do things you enjoyed before, that can sometimes help. And as well here (PC) is a great place to get help/support/understanding with depression too...........you might want to check out the depression forum for a bit more help as well.
So again...........welcome to PC, and glad you joined us.



Alison

[avlady]

Welcome!!!!!I rode the scariest rollar coaster i ever saw and i thought i would be afraid but wasn't. then they had it riding backwards too and i did that too. what a thrill!!

[elevatedsoul]

do you feel other things?
joy, compassion, anger?

[tristanisms]

Originally Posted by elevatedsoul

do you feel other things?
joy, compassion, anger?

I have little trouble coming into contact with those feelings, as apposed to my brother, who I think hasn't felt anything since before the divorce. Anger, however tends to be strong at some times. I also suffer from social anxiety. I always feel I'm in someones way, and I never know when to talk, or what about.