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#1
May 30, 2007, 11:00 AM
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<font color="purple"> tired of pretending that everything is hunky dory....
tired of not getting my emotional needs met.... tired of the constant battles within my own brain..... stop the competition and the fights!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! stop making each other miserable and stop doing what makes another have attacks...... tapped out.... maternal nuturing is drained.... not being the best mom I can be.... feeling guilty and anger at self... feeling used..... not worthy.... damaged.... not sure which is real ... where I am in this body and life... cannot make sense of thoughts and feelings... want to be left alone or do I? want to move on or do I? want to feel good again or do I? want to feel loved , will I know, do I know, can I know, is it there, do I deserve it? empty, yet full..... dillusioned in my own reality....auto pilot, thats all it is.... wish I could shut off my mind... stop the noise.... feel at peace.... shove it away deep down .... tired of sadness, no joy, no smiles just the fake ones I borrow..... freak, mistake, experiment??? where do i belong, can i belong.... dont feel like i belong to myself ..... is there a another me...would it be real... am I real... I just dont know anymore.... confused and frustrated  </font>
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Melinda  Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them.....  because tomorrow just might be too late! 
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#2
May 30, 2007, 11:05 AM
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Oh my, sadly I identified with so much of your post.
I'm sorry it's so rough for you right now. (((SerenitysWave)))
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 Crying isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign of having tried too hard to be strong for too long. |
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#3
May 30, 2007, 11:09 AM
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Thank you Sabrina (((hugs to you too))))) I try to stay positive and say it will pass..... so hard at times tho...
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Melinda Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them..... because tomorrow just might be too late!
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#4
May 30, 2007, 11:57 AM
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Hugs and hugs.
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#5
May 30, 2007, 12:44 PM
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Thank you Wants2Fly
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Melinda Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them..... because tomorrow just might be too late!
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#6
May 30, 2007, 01:51 PM
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((((((((((((( SerenitysWave )))))))))))))))
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#7
May 30, 2007, 01:54 PM
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I'm glad you were able to share...I to identified with your words.
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Direction  Ripple Effect - Small things can make a difference |
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#8
May 30, 2007, 02:56 PM
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Thank you Fuzzy and Direction.... I feel some comfort in knowing that I am not alone but at the same time that saddens me too... Would not wish my worst enemy to feel this way! ((((((((((((((to all of us at PC and those that are suffering silently)))))))))))))))))
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Melinda Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them..... because tomorrow just might be too late!
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#9
May 30, 2007, 06:31 PM
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Keep sharing. Could you ask your kids to give you a hug sandwich??
Tranquility
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#10
May 30, 2007, 06:45 PM
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((((((( SW ))))))
Hugs, Jan
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I still dream and I still hope, therefore I can take what comes today. Jan is in Lothlorien reading 'neath a mallorn tree. My avatar and signature were created for my use only and may not be copied or used by anyone else. |
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#11
May 30, 2007, 08:12 PM
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Thank you Tranquilty and Jan....
I appreciate all the love and support.. I don't feel like i deserve it though... and feeling kinda embarrassed that I am having my own pity party....feeling like nothing i do or say is ever good enough lately.. I do try, just gets shut down seems every time..... hugs from my kids are the best, not short on those.... my kids are huggy loving people even my teen boys... I am blessed, wish I could/would enjoy it more....
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Melinda Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them..... because tomorrow just might be too late!
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#12
May 30, 2007, 08:40 PM
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Sounds very painful-even though you're probably numb. ((((((((((((SerenityWaves))))))))))))))
 We're here- whenever you need to let it out.  Hugs, hugs and more hugs. 
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#13
May 31, 2007, 05:02 AM
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I see so much of me in your post. The fake smiles, trying to pretend everything is fine! I hope you are feeling better today! Sending lots of hugs to you!
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#14
May 31, 2007, 06:53 AM
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Thank you Pickle and Beth
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Melinda Today, NOW! Is the time to tell that someone you love them..... because tomorrow just might be too late!
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#15
May 31, 2007, 03:19 PM
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(((((((((serenityswave))))))))))
Annie |
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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