[Skeezyks]

I have an appointment with my pdoc tomorrow (12/7/15). I'm no longer on any medications & I have no plans to go back on anything. They don't do much good & I can't afford them. I don't see a therapist either. I've continued to see my pdoc every 3 or 4 months simply because he is my last remaining link to the mental health services system where I live. And, having made 2 serious spur-of-the-moment suicide attempts, I felt like perhaps I should at least keep one foot in the door, so to speak. Also, I know that, while I'm doing reasonably well now, my solitary lifestyle is probably tenuous. It wouldn't necessarily take allot to knock me off balance.

But now, I think I've come to the conclusion that it just doesn't really make sense to keep going back. I only see him for about 10 or 15 minutes. And about all he does is to suggest different med's I could try for various concerns I bring up. However, since I have no plans to take anything further, it seems like kind-of a waste of time (both his & mine) as well as of the gas I expend to get to his office. I'll see how I feel about it tomorrow...

[IrisBloom]

I think it's an excellent idea to keep some connection there. Maybe you could go in twice a year or so?

[Nammu]

logic doesn't necessarily pertain to our emotional needs. Even though it seems like a logical thing to not see him anymore I think there is a need to have at least one place/person you can talk to, even if the only tangible thing he can offer is a medication which you will not take, its still a physical relationship. One that you should maybe keep just for contact to the MI system.

[PumpkinPieHead]

You always have us to come talk to, also. And no gas expending necessary

[Skeezyks]

Well... I did it. I was told that if I return within a year, no new Intake process would have to be completed. If I want to return after a year has elapsed, then there would need to be a new Intake process. I'm not sure what that entails since, as far as I know, I never participated in any type of intake process to begin with. But, perhaps, procedures have changed over time. I may consider going back just prior to the end of the year to come. Who knows where I may be by then... if anywhere...

I don't know why, but I feel sort-of "let down"... like I've lost something significant, which I really haven't. I guess it's the realization that I'm now back where I started from... I've gone full circle & nothing of significance has changed. Ah well... "the more things change, the more they stay the same..."

Thanks for reading my post!

[*Laurie*]

Hey Skeezyks, hi...I'm glad you have the option of returning if you need to. I dunno...might it be a good idea to make an appointment for, say, 4 or 5 months from now? Just to have that safety net? Also, what about attending a group...are there any NAMI groups in your area (they're free and really helpful, plus just good to connect with folks).

[Skeezyks]

Originally Posted by LauraBeth

Hey Skeezyks, hi...I'm glad you have the option of returning if you need to. I dunno...might it be a good idea to make an appointment for, say, 4 or 5 months from now? Just to have that safety net? Also, what about attending a group...are there any NAMI groups in your area (they're free and really helpful, plus just good to connect with folks).

Hi LauraBeth: As far as I know, I can go back whenever I want to. However, at this point, I have no plans to return... with the possible exception of just shy of a year from now, depending on circumstances. Since I live in a fairly major metropolitan area, there are lots of services around. However, there's nothing I know of that would be convenient for me to get to. (I don't drive anymore & I consider the metropolitan bus system to be even more dangerous than the streets!) But it is something to keep in mind. Thanks!

Skeezyks, i am glad you posted this. I let my doctor go over a year. I was let go and had to go through the hoops of seeing a new doctor, all new tests, for the same meds. And most of the meds they took me off of them and made me do all the tests that were in front of them results and history. It is sort of like letting your drivers license expire and expect to keep driving. You have to pay all these penalties then prove you are able to drive. twice a year is good. And definetly you have us here. They do the same with Ts now also. You don't get meds unless you see a shrink first. Then the shrink tells the MD you need them and they get prescribed for you. At least that is the way they do it here. I am glad you don't dwell on the big S or think on that too much. You seem like a good soul and i love what you have to post. (((hugs))) tc

Maybe you could make an appointment for six months from now. If you feel the same in five months and don't want to go then cancel the appointment. That sort of keeps some semblance of connection going. I was thinking you mentioned being married in a previous post but my brain is not in game shape today. I can definitely relate to the situation. I've seen my doc twice since I got Medicare and a doc visit costs me more now than it did before. My two meds keep me from sliding off into the abyss but mostly that's all they do... but I'm glad they do that much at least I take generics but the price of each prescription just keeps going up. Hang in there.

[ElephantWarrior]

Hello.

I think there are many paths or roads to healthy living. Also I believe what is important is you continue to do right by yourself. Ask yourself: If you do not continue with a pdoc and/or therapy, what will you use to replace this? We live in an increasingly stressful world, and the need for psychological assistance has consequently risen. Furthermore, the need to talk things over with a professional is not just reserved for the mentally ill, but behold it is utilized very frequently by societies elite and upper-echelon members. Doctors, lawyers, judges, politicians- they are all seeking out support from qualified professionals. You might be surprised how many judges' go to counseling. I don't know you but I would suggest you could benefit from taking advantages of such services from a practical standpoint. Good luck!

[DechanDawa]

It sounds like you want some connection and link to support. You cite two suicide attempts, and a tenuous solitary lifestyle.

I have not attempted suicide but my solitary lifestyle has negative impact on my health, and it is my goal to change this in the new year.

Do you have a meditation center in your area? Maybe you could arrange to have some people from a meditation center visit you. There are always young people connected with these centers who love nothing better than to talk about meditation. From your posts it sounds like you have so much to give, and others could benefit from knowing you. If you were in my community I would like to meet you and visit with you.

We live in an emotionally detached society and too many people live on the fringe. When I was younger I always cared about those who were on the fringe and forgotten, or who for one reason or another ended up isolated. I met some extraordinary people by extending myself out. I used to call such people "hidden gems" -- I belonged to a Buddhist meditation center and through that and hospital volunteer work I found many opportunities to make friends with those who lived a somewhat secluded life.

We need more than annual visits to (somewhat detached) doctors to keep ourselves healthy. We live in an emotionally cold society that doesn't extend itself. I am making it a goal in the coming year to resolve some of these problems for myself. I will keep in touch with my pdoc by email to let her know how I am doing, but she has proved to be a totally ineffectual medical professional. I think it is just important to keep a connection in the event of some future emergency.

I am mostly concerned with you because of your two suicide attempts. This means you are at some risk on some level, because one has to be dealing with a hefty amount of pain to go to this length, and it is a type of pain that wants to be heard.

I care about you, Skeezyks. I am really happy you maintain a presence on Psych Central and it seems many feel as I do, that we always look forward to your posts.
Namaste, DD

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

Hi LauraBeth: As far as I know, I can go back whenever I want to. However, at this point, I have no plans to return... with the possible exception of just shy of a year from now, depending on circumstances. Since I live in a fairly major metropolitan area, there are lots of services around. However, there's nothing I know of that would be convenient for me to get to. (I don't drive anymore & I consider the metropolitan bus system to be even more dangerous than the streets!) But it is something to keep in mind. Thanks!

Yeah, not driving is a tough one unless you live in NYC. It's a good thing that there are resources around if you need them, though. Just, ya know...be sure to reach out if you're feeling suicidal.

[Skeezyks]

Originally Posted by [SIZE="6"

omegalamed[/SIZE];4811844]Skeezyks, i am glad you posted this. I let my doctor go over a year. I was let go and had to go through the hoops of seeing a new doctor, all new tests, for the same meds. And most of the meds they took me off of them and made me do all the tests that were in front of them results and history. It is sort of like letting your drivers license expire and expect to keep driving. You have to pay all these penalties then prove you are able to drive. twice a year is good. And definetly you have us here. They do the same with Ts now also. You don't get meds unless you see a shrink first. Then the shrink tells the MD you need them and they get prescribed for you. At least that is the way they do it here. I am glad you don't dwell on the big S or think on that too much. You seem like a good soul and i love what you have to post. (((hugs))) tc

omegalamed

[Skeezyks]

Originally Posted by DechanDawa

It sounds like you want some connection and link to support. You cite two suicide attempts, and a tenuous solitary lifestyle.

I have not attempted suicide but my solitary lifestyle has negative impact on my health, and it is my goal to change this in the new year.

Do you have a meditation center in your area? Maybe you could arrange to have some people from a meditation center visit you. There are always young people connected with these centers who love nothing better than to talk about meditation. From your posts it sounds like you have so much to give, and others could benefit from knowing you. If you were in my community I would like to meet you and visit with you.

We live in an emotionally detached society and too many people live on the fringe. When I was younger I always cared about those who were on the fringe and forgotten, or who for one reason or another ended up isolated. I met some extraordinary people by extending myself out. I used to call such people "hidden gems" -- I belonged to a Buddhist meditation center and through that and hospital volunteer work I found many opportunities to make friends with those who lived a somewhat secluded life.

We need more than annual visits to (somewhat detached) doctors to keep ourselves healthy. We live in an emotionally cold society that doesn't extend itself. I am making it a goal in the coming year to resolve some of these problems for myself. I will keep in touch with my pdoc by email to let her know how I am doing, but she has proved to be a totally ineffectual medical professional. I think it is just important to keep a connection in the event of some future emergency.

I am mostly concerned with you because of your two suicide attempts. This means you are at some risk on some level, because one has to be dealing with a hefty amount of pain to go to this length, and it is a type of pain that wants to be heard.

I care about you, Skeezyks. I am really happy you maintain a presence on Psych Central and it seems many feel as I do, that we always look forward to your posts.
Namaste, DD

DechanDawa

[avlady]

if i were you i would like to have that "safety net" of a doc and t. i would see them once or twice a year, you don't want to not have anybody there if something should come up where you did need a doc or t. good luck

[Fuzzybear]

I let a pdoc go a long time ago, and what was "left" was worse, then and for a long time (although I had similar thoughts about the pdoc to yours )