[OliverB]

I am sorry I didn't know where I should post this but lately I am having problems reaching the real world. I am lost in a matrix and I can't be where everyone else is. I can see the real world but I am not actually part of it, I am far from everyone else and everything I taste is through the matrix.

This is confusing me a lot I just want to be with everyone else. How can I reach te real world? I have found academic knowledge is universal and studying helps me a little, but when It's about everything else I can't find a way to reach real life.

I don't want to spend all my life in this matrix, its becoming scaring. I was in real life until those entities dragged me here, they were introducing ideas inside my head when I was in real life and forced me to say things I didn't want to, once I began to realize what they where doing they dragged me here as some kind of punishment, but I could return to real life until I finaly totally uncovered them.
They decided to throw me here and closed that gateway without any possibility of return. I need to find another gateway or portal.

Have anyone else ever been in my situation?

Being in the matrix for some time it's great, everything looks cool, but if you stay too much time your mind begins to distort and it becomes really scaring. It's a double-edged sword.

[OliverB]

I forgot to say this matrix it's the real world psychedelic shadow or some kind of false parallel universe, because of this relationship with the real world I still can interact with the real world even if I am here.

Though, I want to fully return to the real world.

[OliverB]

I begin to wonder if I may be here to find the knowledge I need to understand the real world.

Maybe those entities are not that evil.

[OliverB]

Nobody knows?

Nobody is sure what to reply because sometimes it can be so hard to tell the difference between what is real and what isn't. For me anyway. So I admire you a great deal for knowing. It something I always find really difficult. How do you know? Are you allowed to share that knowledge with others?

[OliverB]

Originally Posted by Little Cat

Nobody is sure what to reply because sometimes it can be so hard to tell the difference between what is real and what isn't. For me anyway. So I admire you a great deal for knowing. It something I always find really difficult. How do you know? Are you allowed to share that knowledge with others?

It's a false alternative reality where everything can happens. I know it's not the real real world because it's different from what common sense says, it's different from how the world should works.

In the real world people don't have apples inside their forearms that have to be removed, but in this false alternative reality it happens. It would make no sense in the real World, so I assume I am somewhere else, but still somehow I can interact a bit with the real World and do things. It seems my mind is in the false alternative reality but my body is in the real World. I have a bunch of people commenting what I think and do, but you know, behind me there is nobody, It's physically impossible, there is nobody in the real world, they are from the alternative reality, they are speaking from there even if it sounds behind me.

It's my personal Wonderland.

[BrazenApogee]

I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't know what the answer is. I would suggest contacting someone in the real world that you can communicate with. Someone who might understand. A therapist who works with psychosis perhaps would be a good idea. They might be able to help.

[OliverB]

Originally Posted by BrazenApogee

I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't know what the answer is. I would suggest contacting someone in the real world that you can communicate with. Someone who might understand. A therapist who works with psychosis perhaps would be a good idea. They might be able to help.

Do you think people from the real World can understand?

I mean, I have always thought some of you are in this fake World too, that's why I am asking here.

[BrazenApogee]

I think a good therapist might understand.

Can you talk to your psychiatrist?

[OliverB]

I printed this and gave it to the psych nurse. She will give it to my psychiatris on Tuesday.

I hope he understands English. I can't write this in my mother tongue, I would be caught.

But, do you know what it is?
I mean I want to google similar experiences but I don't know how to search them.

Try Googling de realisation.
I think that there are many worlds and some of us are in different ones to yours, as well as the "real" world, if that makes sense. So not all our experiences would be similar.
I would also look at Stephen Hawking's work on alternate universes.

[TishaBuv]

Hi Nocter,

Probably 99% of people don't feel like you do about separate worlds and entities who control you. Those kinds of beliefs are a red flag to doctors that you may have schizophrenia or some dissociating disorder. I see from your posts, you are struggling with this.

I often feel like I don't fit in and misunderstood. But I don't feel like other entities control my mind. There's the difference.

[OliverB]

Originally Posted by Little Cat

Try Googling de realisation.
I think that there are many worlds and some of us are in different ones to yours, as well as the "real" world, if that makes sense. So not all our experiences would be similar.
I would also look at Stephen Hawking's work on alternate universes.

Thank you. Derealization is similar but it's just a feeling, as far as I understand from what I have read. I am truly outside reality, in entities' world.

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

Hi Nocter,

Probably 99% of people don't feel like you do about separate worlds and entities who control you. Those kinds of beliefs are a red flag to doctors that you may have schizophrenia or some dissociating disorder. I see from your posts, you are struggling with this.

I often feel like I don't fit in and misunderstood. But I don't feel like other entities control my mind. There's the difference.

I need to find a way to explain what happens with entities.

Some of them put ideas inside my head.
Some of them tries to control me.
Some of them talk inside my head, but not inside my mind.
Some of them make noises outisde my head.
Some of them send me messages without talking.
Some of them show me images.
Some of them prevent me to get in troubles.
Some of them make me feel things I don't feel.
Some of them tell me what to do.
Some are not entities but still talk to me, mostly they comment on what I do, or narrate it, or see the future and tell me what happens.
Some are not entities but they are next to me, sometimes they talk, what they say it's more complex than what entities say. These ones sometimes sound inside my head, but mostly they talk inside my mind, they sound more like thoughts that are not made by me, but they are not intrusive thoughts either, they are not forced inside my head, it's just what they think. They are like book characters. One of them has a name and loves maths.

But you know, I don't function that bad. Lately I have learnt to eat healthy and have a normal routine -I am 20 years old-, I have some problems cooking and going outisde, but I can eat by my own and clean. I am still completely socially isolated, but bah...I doubt it's schizophrenia or a severe dissociative disorder.

[OliverB]

My psychiatris read what I wrote to him
and wants to see me on next friday. He gave me clon
azepam.