[NotDeadYet]

How do I know if my problems are actually from mental illness or if I'm just making them up to get attention? I do want my friends to care about me but whenever I brought up some of my problems I would do it jokeingly as to not scare them.
I have told 3 people seriously about my problems, 2 people I know now well and a councerler. But what if how I act is the attention seeking behaviour? My loud personality around friends to keep the spotlight on me and the jealousy/anger I get when they don't pay attention to me enough when I want it, is it manipulative? Should I just end all my relationships to save them the trouble of dealing with me?
Sorry for the incoherent ramble

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm struggling with this too.. I'm really sorry, I know how you feel What mental illness do you have? If you're genuinely suffering, then I don't think you're making it up..

[Gojamadar]

Originally Posted by NotDeadYet

How do I know if my problems are actually from mental illness or if I'm just making them up to get attention? I do want my friends to care about me but whenever I brought up some of my problems I would do it jokeingly as to not scare them.
I have told 3 people seriously about my problems, 2 people I know now well and a councerler. But what if how I act is the attention seeking behaviour? My loud personality around friends to keep the spotlight on me and the jealousy/anger I get when they don't pay attention to me enough when I want it, is it manipulative? Should I just end all my relationships to save them the trouble of dealing with me?
Sorry for the incoherent ramble

Hi,

My loud personality around friends to keep the spotlight on me and the jealousy/anger I get when they don't pay attention to me enough when I want it, is it manipulative?

Since You know what you're doing and why you're doing it, it can't be mental illness but a personal characteristic. You could change your behaviour by toning down your craving for attention. You could also seek advice from a friend or a counsellor.

[possum220]

You are dealing with serious issues including mental ones. You deserve to be helped. Attention seeking for the sake of it? Absolutely not.

Our proximity to other people in life will often ebb and flow. Be kind to yourself and others.

I agree, the fact you are able to acknowledge it suggests to me this is a personality trait. Is this compulsive behavior? I myself in public situations want validation. I catch myself drawing things out into stories. I can't help doing this. I mentally kick myself afterwards. I suppose this falls into the category of attention seeking. I don't feel it is part of my mental illness. I think it stems from the fact that for the first 45 years of my life I was stifled and ignorred.

Again, are you aware of this as it happens? Do you make a conscious decision to do this or is it something you are compelled to do?

[NotDeadYet]

Originally Posted by justafriend306

I agree, the fact you are able to acknowledge it suggests to me this is a personality trait. Is this compulsive behavior? I myself in public situations want validation. I catch myself drawing things out into stories. I can't help doing this. I mentally kick myself afterwards. I suppose this falls into the category of attention seeking. I don't feel it is part of my mental illness. I think it stems from the fact that for the first 45 years of my life I was stifled and ignorred.

Again, are you aware of this as it happens? Do you make a conscious decision to do this or is it something you are compelled to do?

I actually dont recognize my behavior in the moment, even when I get annoyed at them and go bigger in my behavior i dont recognize it, it isnt til later on do i think about my behavior during the day and regret it and hit a low point where i start going into a cycle of paranoia about my friends. I can make the conscious decision to cut out really harmful behavior (i.e I nearly strangled a friend ruff housing with him so i stopped doing that) I hope this makes sense.

Attention seeking can still be a symptom of a mental illnessn and just because you seem attention at certain times does not rule out other symptoms you may be expereicing, you just might be playing them up a little in order to receive acceptance.

For example, I once exaggerated a diagnosis to an extreme because I felt that what I was going through (which for me, was also caused by PTSD) wasn't understood by others and I wouldn't get the support I needed. This doesn't mean I don't have a mental illness. In fact I see my constant desire for acceptance and love as PART of my illness.

[Misssy2]

Originally Posted by NotDeadYet

How do I know if my problems are actually from mental illness or if I'm just making them up to get attention? I do want my friends to care about me but whenever I brought up some of my problems I would do it jokeingly as to not scare them.
I have told 3 people seriously about my problems, 2 people I know now well and a councerler. But what if how I act is the attention seeking behaviour? My loud personality around friends to keep the spotlight on me and the jealousy/anger I get when they don't pay attention to me enough when I want it, is it manipulative? Should I just end all my relationships to save them the trouble of dealing with me?
Sorry for the incoherent ramble

I have Borderline Personality Disorder and if you read about it...I can see that the behaviors you mention can be attributed to this disorder.

Fear of abandonment...so we crave that attention and exhibit attention seeking behaviors...no description says that exactly but I have had conversations with therapists about this and this is one of the reasons I am diagnosed with BPD. So, take a look..STOP being hard on yourself...

No, you shouldn't end your relationships....that would definetly make an attention seeker more miserable...with no one around to get attention fixes from. Just accept who you are..and reel it in when you are feeling out of control.

[KaleighBites]

I think you're just overthinking it (because you acknowledge that you don't like it)