My struggle ...

I suffer from a short mental capacity. What I mean by that is that whenever I do some mental activities like reading, thinking, and focusing on something that requires mental effort, I get tired very quickly (within minutes), and I lose concentration. Often times I get headaches, and everything goes blank.

But this also happens when I am in large crowds, like parties and airports. I feel so overwhelmed, and as if my brain shuts down and everything starts to look fake, and I lose my ability to realize what's happening. I see people talking and moving, but in my head they are just images and noises. I somehow disassociate from reality. I usually connect the two, but maybe they are different things.

For example, I recently traveled, and I was mentally drained as soon as I stepped into the airport to check-in my bags, and got headache all the way, and wasn't on my full awareness and mental capacity at all. I thought to myself, well this isn't normal. People around me seemed to be mentally sharp, and very connected to the reality.

I've suffered this for as long as I can remember. I think this has created a ripple effect in my life, because I cannot do anything very well, which has eroded my-self esteem, and from there things have just collapsed in my life.

((((Iamless Soul)))) I'm so sorry you're struggling. Have you already talked about this with your doctor? Perhaps he/she could help with this problem? I'm sorry it's having such an impact in your life

I think you should see a doctor.

I did. At first he thought it's ADHD, and then anxiety.

I'm so sorry you struggle with this. I'm not a mental health professional, but what you describe sounds like symptoms of depersonalization/derealization. This form of dissociation can happen when our bodies/brains feel overwhelmed and pull the circuit breaker in a sense to protect us. Something that a former therapist of mine suggested was to focus on mindfulness and grounding techniques. These can help to calm our systems so we can learn to be more present without dissociating.

I'm wondering if your doctor recommended any tips or treatment options for dealing with the anxiety. I've found that having at least a starting place to look for tips and tricks can be helpful.

I apologize if I am off base and I hope you find what you're looking for.

I saw a psychiatrist, so he prescribes medications, I guess. He didn't give me anything for the anxiety, though, because I didn't continue with him. But yes, I think it's what you described. When I am alone, I am OK, but around people, the reality changes. Also, when I am with someone or a small group of people but in a loud place like a bar, I feel the same way. Everything stops in my mind, and my thought process will be very flawed that I say and do things I shouldn't because I cannot focus and connect with reality. I am sure people think I am awkward and weird because of it.