No Christmas Tree This Year

I just can't do it.

I am Jewish, but my husband is not. Every year since we have met I have loved to celebrate Christmas with him. I would literally be freaking out like a little kid on the day after Thanksgiving-- "Can we put up the tree yet?? Can we??" I was so excited last year because it was the first year we had our own house and could decorate the outside.

This year, nothing.

No tree. No lights. No decorations. I don't want it.

Here, Pink, have one of my activities this year.

My daughter-in-law is Jewish. We were over at her, son's and grandkids (3-1/2 and 2-1/2) house the other night, Monday, the "big" present night for Hanukkah. We learned about the Hanukiah (who knew there were different kinds of menorahs? :-) and she helped the children light theirs, but they couldn't light the shamash because one set was really old, looked like brass, and bent so it would have been hot-wax-on-child city. Cat (daughter-in-law) chanted" the blessings and I'd never heard her "singing" voice. It was warm and "rich". It "felt" good to me and I felt blessed.

The kids were quiet and respectful despite wanting to get to their presents their other grandparents had sent them. They got scooters and immediately impressed their two uncles into helping put them together. http://www.amazon.com/Dora-the-Explo.../dp/B000GFT91A

We all made an impromtu decision to get together for "brunch" on Christmas morning.

pink - do you feel like he is pushing christmas on you? have you talked to him about why you dont want the tree up?

were not putting ours up but for totally different reasons. their names are hera, consuela and zeke and theyre kittens. lol.

im not a scholar in judaeism or anything but i know that growing up catholic showed me a lot of the inconsistancies and hypocracies in organized religion. are you seeing those and thats why you dont want the tree up?

We are both the least religious people in the entire world. I just believe in celebrating the holidays-- all of them-- no matter what you are.

My husband doesn't care too much about the tree for himself-- he says that we do for "us" or for "me" and that if I don't want to do it, he's not going to push.

It has nothing to do with religion or my husband or anything like that-- it's all because of my depressive episode.

oh, im sorry youre going through that

were pretty opposite of religious also so i know what you mean. I usually dont do it for religion, I just like spending time together doing something productive.

Im glad that he understands though and isn't trying to push you or guilt you into doing something you don't want to do. holidays are hard enough without all the extra crap.

It's OK Pink. I was just wondering what meaning or interpretation did the decorations have for you in past years versus this year??? The decorations are just things (no emotions) until you attach meaning to them, then they are generate feelings. In the past the decorations generated a lot of happiness for you! Do the decorations represent or symbolize something different this year? Just a thought.

No, I'm just depressed and flat as %#@&#! and I can't enjoy anything. Decorating for the holidays brought about a lot of excitement, happiness, and comfort... Now I don't want it. I don't feel like doing it. It seems pointless and too much of a chore for me this year. I miss my former self.

i know that the whole being with my boyfriend and doing something that had immediate results really made me happy. same thing with cleaning. we love cleaning together cause its something you can see immediate results with and its productive. you think maybe if you kinda forced yourself to start it that after a few minutes it would make you feel like your old self again? the hardest part in everything is starting. once you get over that hump it might help you feel better. just my thinking

Pink

I don't see anything wrong with taking a break this year. Put your feet up and enjoy the home decor you have now. You might feel grateful on January 2nd. You can sip eggnog and snicker to yourself while everyone has to do all that packing up and storing away in the attic. You'll be ahead of the game - all set for next year.

Hope you're feeling better soon.