[Taonuviel]

Yeah, so I would've done it that night, but following my promise to contact someone, I called 1-800-suicide. The plan was to not let on enough, or to bolt before anyone could interfere. But the guy decided I really wasn't safe, and called the police early on in the call. So they showed up at my door, and I had to go inpatient.
The hospital experience was good, though, this was a VERY good hospital, better than the one I'd gone to a month ago, which I also liked. And I guess now, with the partial program, I think I'm going to push through these very stressful, unsure weeks and make it where I need to be.
Now I've just got to get medicaid, because without it the bills will be way too much... the lesser ones I got from a month ago are too much... I'll probably end up suicidal again if I can't get this financial help.
See how this goes. I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted, and pretty tired all around. It's really hard.

<font color=green>____________________________
Matthew 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.</font color=green> Sounds good...

[krzyk101]

Glad you are back, and that you were able to get and are getting help. I wish you well on the meicaid, and hope you do not get too upset over the process, which I know can cause stress. Take care, and am glad that you are still here.

God Bless-Chris

______________
~KRIS~

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

[Peanut61]

Welcome back, ((Tao)), and good for you in reaching out when you needed to.

Fondly, Peanut

<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue>

[gloria]

Yeah! you're back! Good!
I'm also glad your experience at the hospital was good, that also helps. Once you get medicaid you'll be all set.

Good for making that call too. It all worked out for the best for what I see.



gab

[SeptemberMorn]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tao}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} It's so good to see you back!! I'm so, so glad that you did reach out for help and that your hospital stay was positive. Mine was, too.

It's tough when you first get out but the partial program helps. It can be fun at times, too.

A very warm welcome back to the boards!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tao}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} And an extra hug to grow on.





<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[shakes]

((((Tao))))
I have missed you. I am glad to hear that you were able to reach out to someone who was able to help you. We are here if you need us.

Jessica

<font color=blue>The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain</font color=blue>
~Seether and Amy Lee

[Taonuviel]

Thanks everyone. I appreciate it.
I'm really enjoying the partial program, I love the chance to be around people and have some structure for my day. And I'm hoping to get something out of the groups. I'll miss it when I'm discharged. But I'm thinking maybe I should look into that field... nothing that'd take a masters degree, just something working with the patients. I wish there was some way to work with people on an equal level, one free to share back and forth like the conversations I had with other patients there. Maybe I should look into mentoring... there's a position it'd be nice to have in a hospital, someone who can share their experiences to help someone else along. *shrug.*
Anyway, my thinking's kinda off, I think I'm numb, or it's like my brain is tired but I'm not. I've kinda babbled on in here, so I think I'll just end this message.

<font color=green>____________________________
Matthew 11:28
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.</font color=green> Sounds good...

[Rapunzel]

Tao,

Glad you are back, and it sounds like you are getting good treatment. That's what I like about psych central - it is an opportunity to share experiences and encourage each other back and forth as equals. That was something I was desperately searching for, as it seems that in all of my relationships I was either needy and dependent, or I felt responsible for someone else and they leaned on me. I needed a chance to have friends who both give support and give me a chance to support them when they need it, and we can understand each other.

Then, on the other hand, you could look into mentoring programs, or even a degree in psychology or counseling. You're smart enough, and you have empathy. If it turns out to be something you like, don't let anything stop you.

<font color=orange>"If a light beckons to you, follow it. If it leads you into the quagmire, you'll probably find your way out of it again; but if you don't follow it, you'll be plagued for the rest of your life by the thought that perhaps it was your star." Friedrich Hebbet</font color=orange>