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#1
Oct 30, 2004, 12:34 PM
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Been thinking... too much someone said?
I have had blood tests 2x in the last 2 years... results sent to personal MD and Oncologist... no response of anything there not sure why the MD sent me to the oncologist in the first place. now another MD says needs blood tests to prove his thoughts. forget it. they can share the results. just because I can't recall what all has happened and been done in the last 2 years (try 2 months... ) why have these things repeated? so it's nothing. just me and God. He can continue all He wants... we'll see how hard He wants to win. everyone finds more to support old and new dx s they can't all be right... or they are or they aren't or none are anything! life? forget this!
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#2
Oct 30, 2004, 01:22 PM
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((((((((((Sky)))))))))): I'm a bit cornfuzzled (as Tomi would say) about exactly what's happening... Do they want to run tests over again, or ...?? Keeping you in my thoughts/prayers!
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#3
Oct 31, 2004, 07:21 AM
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Sky I understand not remembering it all and the tests and Doctors and it all twisting around in the mind and then an overload...When your T gets in I would let him 'take charge' and help you figure out all the different requests from the MD's. Hang in there and try not to worry. A good friend once told me with our PTSD we tend to have the "Doomsday Thoughts" when it comes to things like this. Hope you feel better soon. Take Care,
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 If you think you have totally givin' up- you haven't, because you are here!
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#4
Oct 31, 2004, 09:01 AM
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Yes, thanks kris... you are so right about the PTSD it's the catastrophizing I'm trying to guard against. But I always did that in a panic mode... this time... it's calculating instead.
I went and checked sites about the leukemia... it fits. It all fits, right down to the symptoms of MS which other doctors dx'd me as possibly having, had MRIs... "only" myelopathy... this fits too. The anemia, loss of weight, up to 3 years latency ( 2 1/2 years since "bite"), back pain lower body problems in legs, etc, spinal cord, I won't continue... I almost hope for confirmation. Finally, I will have closure on a terrible, miserable (and miserably lived) life. Closure on such failure! Got to go... my church service in on tv... guess I get to have church today anyway!
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#5
Oct 31, 2004, 12:46 PM
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Praying that you'll get a clean bill of health.
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