[Fuzzybear]

"Individuals with Avoidant Personality Disorder react with intense hurt to low level criticism"

I own that..........or I used to. NOT FUN!!!!!!

me too. it makes me feel like the world is so mean.

[Fuzzybear]

Yeah, and it isn't always us imagining the meanness (I wish it was)

unrelated - omg. u have like 10x the posts than i do. U are legendary

[Fuzzybear]

I know!!!

[MyBestKids2]

Can you please help me understand "react"?

I feel the intense hurt, but I never express it.. Is that the same thing? Stupid question I know.

[Fuzzybear]

It's not a stupid question. I'm not sure how well I can answer it though.

It's my understanding that with borderline personality disorder, people tend to "react" to feelings of hurt, abandonment etc.... often pushing away the very person or people they want to keep "closer" to them.

With Avoidant Personality, people usually but not always keep the hurt inside. But I've read about the "hostility" associated with Avoidant PD so I'm not sure.....

I hope Rapunzel or someone else will come along later and reply with a more "helpful" reply!

yeah.. sometimes i cant understand the diff between boarderline and avoidant, but my T feels if you rarely express your anger/hurt than its more avoidant. That problely wasnt even your question though

[Fuzzybear]

AVOIDANT PERSONALITY DISORDER

This disorder is characterized by a long-standing and complex pattern of feelings of inadequacy, extreme sensitivity to what other people think about them, and social inhibition.

It typically manifests itself by early adulthood and includes a majority of the following symptoms:

*avoids occupational activities that involve significant

*interpersonal contact, because of fears of criticism, disapproval, or rejection

*is unwilling to get involved with people unless certain of being liked

*shows restraint within intimate relationships because of the fear of being shamed or ridiculed

*is preoccupied with being criticized or rejected in social situations

*is inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy

*views self as socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others

*is unusually reluctant to take personal risks or to engage in any new activities because they may prove embarrassing

---------------------

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER

A person who suffers from this disorder has labile interpersonal relationships characterized by instability. This pattern of interacting with others has persisted for years and is usually closely related to the person's self-image and early social interactions.

The pattern is present in a variety of settings (e.g., not just at work or home) and often is accompanied by a similar lability (fluctuating back and forth, sometimes in a quick manner) in a person's affect, or feelings.

Relationships and the person's affect may often be characterized as being shallow. A person with this disorder may also exhibit impulsive behaviors and exhibit a majority of the following symptoms:

*frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.

*a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation

*identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

*impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)
recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior

*affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)

*chronic feelings of emptiness

*inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)

*transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms

http://www.pipeline.com/~dada3zen/personality.htm

[Fuzzybear]

Thanks for posting this (((((((((((((((( Wise Flower ))))))))))))))))

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
"Individuals with Avoidant Personality Disorder react with intense hurt to low level criticism"

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
I'm not sure there is such a thing as "low level criticism"-- is there? my "knee jerk" reaction is sure it's all high level!


mandy

[Rapunzel]

I would say that "reacting" is anything that you do in response to something external to you. It would include feelings that you hold in and don't express, as well as outward displays of anger. People with avoidant personality disorder are very sensitive to rejection, so much so that they avoid social situations where they could experience rejection. That could easily be a reaction to having been hurt by criticism and being sensitive to it.

It's very hard to change, but I have often heard or been told that people are to act and not to be acted upon. To react is to be acted upon and to let that decide your actions (or lack thereof). If you see that in yourself, maybe you will want to work on trying not to let what someone else says or does determine how you feel, especially how you feel about yourself.

Rap

[Fuzzybear]

Yeah, there's high level criticism and then there's agonisingly high level criticism......

(hearts) Mandy (hearts)

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((((( Rap ))))))))))))))))))