Codependency anyone?!

So after MANY years of suffering and too many unfulfilling and unhealthy relationships to count, I have finally been able to put a name to my issue- CODEPENDENCY!!

I have scoured the internet for a couple of weeks reading and learning about Codependency. I'm DETERMINED to make changes.

I know I'm not alone and wanted to see if there are others that are going through the same things.

Thankfully, I have started attending CoDa meetings (who knew there was a 12 step program for this) and I'm learning how to love me.

Just thought I'd reach out ... (and try to control my urge to give unsolicited advice) YIKES!!!

Did you know codependency is on the narcissistic continuum or NPI? It's not healthy narcissism.

What is the NPI?

Narcissistic personality index

I attended CoDA meetings several years ago and found it a very helpful place to start to deal with the problem. It wasn't sufficient for me to find and learn to love myself, but it was definitely a good start and I really appreciated the fellowship. I didn't feel so all alone.

Hope things work out well for you!

I don't get that it's Narcissistic.

There's a blog called the narcissistic continuum that talks about this. Codependency is underdeveloped narcissism. Let me know if you can't find the blog and I'll post a link.

Codependent No More by Melody Beatty is an old but good book that might help you. I found it tremendously helpful

I dislike that word, since we are all dependent on someone, usually.

"Codependent relationships are a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one person supports or enables another person's drug addiction, alcoholism, gambling addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement."

I could say that I am codependent, too. I've wondered about it. But couldn't you almost say this definition is true of nearly any intimate, committed relationship?

No, codependency came out of the alcoholism recovery movement. As the alcoholic is dependent on the alcohol, the codependent is also affected by the alcohol. Coda.org is the website and healing the child within by dr. Charles Whitfield is the best book. Interdependent is healthy. That's the term you're looking for that we all should be striving for.