[ECHOES]

With the rage that can't be expressed?

When does this go away?

I'm middle aged. I'm so sick of it all.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm not sure that I have an answer! It does get better though, it has for me and I believe it will for you too

PM me if you want more suggestions!

[pachyderm]

The only thing I can think of to say is: bit by bit. Slowly. Try to put it into words. Try to formulate your anger in words. Try to tell someone about it.

[mlpHolmes]

I am so very sorry Echoes you're going through rough times. I too am middle-aged & I understand your statements "when does this go away" and "I'm so sick of it all". I hear you. There is a lot of wonderful news!! #1. Even though it may not feel like it, the depression is Temporary, it will pass, repeat often.
#2. Therapists can help you with new ways of thinking
(Cog. Beh.Th.,/ Dial, Beh. Th.)& coping skills that may make a difference in your moods & your Life. and Third, speak to a therapist regularly to help you with the rage you are feeling. You may have talked this through in the past with many other Ts, but each T has different styles, approaches and techniques. You may find one that will help you where you are right now. It's an adventure! Let us know how you are doing! mlphomes

[Doh2007]

Not sure what you mean by "can't be expressed." Do you mean out loud? Because I was able to drain off lots of rage through journaling and therapy. I never had to confront anyone; I wouldn't have been able to.

[Perna]

I think you have to figure out how to bleed it off like Pachy suggests instead of just trying to move it around like a bad mercury spill.

I don't know if you have problems with when others get mad at you? but I got some help that way; a boss got mad at me but I knew I was right and "took" his anger, just repeating what was true and eventually he heard me and apologized profusely, etc. and fixed what we were arguing about. That taught me that I wouldn't "break" if people got mad at me and it was a little longer but then I got it that other people won't break if I express anger to them, expecially my therapist. So some of that free floating stuff got bled off and I learned my anger wasn't going to "kill" anyone in and of itself and I wasn't going to kill anyone in any event like I'd half feared. That took some of the wind out of the rage too.

Echoes,
I'm 37 and have recently found out that I have Borderline Traits. The rage and the devastation are unbelievable. No one who doesn't have this could ever imagine how painful the emotions are, especially when you can't really pinpoint why they are there. I'm frustrated with it also!

[Fuzzybear]

[SerenitysWave]

I write... and when that isnt enough I unfrotunately turn to self destructive ways... I try to get help before I reach that point b/c I fear my limits with go too far... And sometimes I go outside scream and find some branches and break away.. sounds odd but for it works sometimes...

Not sure when it will end, if ever... but I have hope and they are getting better.. as I gain more insight and knowledge of myself and see/feel the onset of trouble within myself...

(((((hugs)))))))))

[Jenny567]

My husband says that he thinks all the rage is pent up from years of not being able to express it and that it will go away once I've used it all up.

[ECHOES]

I would disagree. I feel it's anger that began long long ago before we had words to use about what made us angry. And it's also about what's happening now that we still may have no words for. This is why therapy is so wonderful, to help with things like exploring what's going on, finding words for it.

But sometimes mine creeps back up on me. It really does seem for me to come from 'out of the blue' but I believe that is because it comes from a place/time where there were no words (childhood) and that I have connected with something from then, so this wordless unexplainable rage surfaces.

And darn it, it makes me mad when it happens .... Here I am arleady angry, feeling like raging, and then I get mad because it's happening!! lol

[ECHOES]

(((((((((((((( everyone who read and responded!!! ))))))))))



Thank you so much!

[Robert31]

This is probably one of the most baffling symptoms I have. Even when I am not mad the rage is inside. Heaven help me when i get into an argument. it comes out more strong than I want. It seems to keep my other emotions intensified. I have tried all kinds of relaxation exercises, exercise,punching pillows. One of the best things for me is to get in a quiet place with no one around and close my eyes or get in a dark place and focus all my thoughts on either a sound i hear or a thought that i have. It took me awhile to get to the point where all my thoughts and intense emotions didn't fllood my head. I am 44 yrs old and sometimes it still gets the best of me. All I can hope for is relief whenever I can get it. I hope this helps or gives you ideas. My therapist tells me I that I probably will never be "cured", but I can find ways to make it manageable.

[Lachrymancer]

i say we start a fight club ...

[Doh2007]

Don't forget rule 1.