Is there a role for humor when learning about, employing and discussing grounding? The threshold query is what is grounding and why is it important? This link is a great source for learning about grounding:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/showt...t=16719&page=2

As the article states, "grounding skills are interventions that assist in keeping a person in the present. They help to reorient a person to reality and the immediate here-and-now. Grounding skills are useful in many ways. They are particularly helpful with symptoms of dissociation. They can help a person prevent dissociating. However, they can be used to help re-orient oneself when experiencing intense and overwhelming feelings and intense anxiety. They help to regain one's mental focus."

Getting back to the here-and-now is important because it helps a person who has been triggered assess what is going on and get him/herself to a safe place. Triggers are associated with trauma that has occurred in the past. As one source tells us:

A trauma trigger is an experience that triggers a traumatic memory in someone who has experienced trauma. A trigger is thus a troubling reminder of a traumatic event, although the trigger itself need not be frightening or traumatic.

Triggers can be quite diverse, appearing in the form of individual people, places, noises, images, smells, tastes, emotions, animals, films, scenes within films, dates of the year, tones of voice, body positions, bodily sensations, weather conditions, time factors, or combinations thereof. Triggers can be subtle and difficult to anticipate, and can sometimes exacerbate Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, a condition in which trauma survivors cannot control the recurrence of emotional or physical symptoms, or of repressed memory. A trauma trigger may also be referred to as a trauma stimulus or a trauma stressor.

Having to re-experience a traumatic event like rape or any other physical or mental abuse is no laughing matter. Making light of a trauma might very will trigger more trauma. Flashbacks are very difficult to get rid of.

On the other hand, recent studies show there is a clear relationship between a sense of humor and mental health. Participants in surveys who are found to have an elevated sense of humor also have no or little difficulty in daily life and have greater mental health. Even so, the limited studies I looked at did not disclose whether those who had experienced trauma were included as survey participants.

That said, I remain reticent to initiate humor into grounding experiences. If my efforts to ground have lead to a madcap adventure, I expect I would want to share the misadventure anticipating some banter at my expense. Nonetheless, I consider it a contingency that the humor be initiated by the one attempting to ground.

Even under that circumstance, I worry that what might well be very funny stuff for one may be a trigger for another. Perhaps if those engaged in the conversation were friends or at least knew something of the history of those present, my thought process might be somewhat different.

Ultimately, I recognize and appreciate the value of humor. I just think I would rather not focus the humor on events that have the potential to cause others so much pain.

[Perna]

I'm not sure why you are combining grounding and humor in the way it appears you are; like the humor has to be about the traumatic experience, just because the grounding is to help with that? Humor is humor. If you laugh, that's good. Doesn't matter what you laugh at.

One can only really learn from experience; books are not "reality"/part of experience. I am thinking about Julia Roberts in "Runaway Bride" when she was accused of not knowing how she liked her eggs so cooked eggs every way known to woman and that was funny to me, even though the knowledge that she had not thought about, didn't know herself well enough to know how she liked her eggs was painful. I love imaginative, creative, humorous, curious, thoughtful responses to problems like that.

One can't know what will cause another pain and should not live one's life worrying too much about the other people living their lives; too me, it seems very much like worrying how the neighbor's grass is doing, is it green or not doing as well as mine. Yes, when I'm taking to an individual, one-on-one, I should be aware of their situation and not make fun of it, but I don't feel making fun of a problem is the same as humor.

There's no humor in post traumatic stress as you say but I think there can be humor (to me) in my relationship to post traumatic stress and I often use humor to help myself see things differently. Psychotics talking to themselves is not funny but I can laugh at myself talking to myself and I'm not worrying about psychotics being upset because I'm not talking about them! What is it C.S. Lewis said in his book The Great Divorce? that those in Heaven would ". . .not make a midden of the world’s garden for the sake of some who cannot abide the smell of roses."

Too humor is a very individual thing; what you find humorous might be different from what I find humorous. You might find this interesting and useful (I do):

http://shadow.ieor.berkeley.edu/humor/

[amante]

I'm so glad you posted this post, talking about triggers and what can make you flashback. I woke up this morning with a shining black eye, a real bruiser, looks like a was hit by Mike Tyson, how did I get it.. well, yesterday my Great Dane dog decided she'd smack her skull bone into my eye brow bone and we went for the clash, I didn't think about it till later when the bruising started to come out, well this morning I look like I've done 10 rounds in the ring, I oddly looked at my face and the trigger was it put me back 20 years to my violent abuse by my exboyfriend who was a boxer incidently and left many a bruised eye on me, so I go to the store with my son and can't help people noticing my black eye, and them forming an opinion as I stood their at the cash register. It was hard for me to look in the mirror today, and see the bruising staring back at me and it was a very triggering moment but then I look at my lovely Great dane and it all slips away, her eyes melted me and I knew she was there for me.

The impetus for my post is the result of a question posed by the leader of the Grounding Skills chat. Those attending were asked to post our opinions here. My opinion was from the perspective that those reading it would be the victims of trauma.

[amante]

Originally Posted by TheByzantine

The impetus for my post is the result of a question posed by the leader of the Grounding Skills chat. Those attending were asked to post our opinions here. My opinion was from the perspective that those reading it would be the victims of trauma.

sorry i didn't mean to jump on and post, I was just stating that this event triggered me to flashback to being beaten by a violent man.

No reason to be sorry, Amanda. I appreciate and learn from all comments. I was remiss for not being more specific of the reason behind the post. Also, I am truly sorry for what happened to you.

We are here to learn from and support each other. Let us continue to do so.

[amante]

Originally Posted by TheByzantine

No reason to be sorry, Amanda. I appreciate and learn from all comments. I was remiss for not being more specific of the reason behind the post. Also, I am truly sorry for what happened to you.

We are here to learn from and support each other. Let us continue to do so.

Thank you so much, I probably wasn't reading the thread thoroughly enough. your support means alot to me.

[gravyyy]

I think if laughter is something you enjoy, it could be used as a "reward" for properly grounding. We talked yesterday in chat about using something comforting to ground (like a teddy bear) and I said I couldn't use that to ground but it would be a good reward. I think laughter would be the same for me. Laughter releases dopamine which helps you feel good so it can take you from feeling exhausted after a grounding episode to feeling markedly more relaxed and pleasant feeling. I don't know this to be 100% true but I would think it would have more use after grounding rather than using it to ground. I don't know about you, but when I need to ground, laughter isn't anywhere around!!! I'm going to see if I can try out using it after grounding to feel relief! I'll let you know how it goes!

Thanks, gravyyy. I expect we will have a lot to talk about at the next grounding chat. As Perna pointed out, humor is an individual thing. If humor is a beneficial grounding tool, it should be used. I am hoping more will provide their viewpoints.

We must not forget, the idea is to get from a bad place to a safe place.

[Crew]

I'm the chat leader of Grounding Skills and I did indeed ask if there was a place for humor in healing from trauma, mental health etc... Over the years of my own healing, I have found that if I didn't have a sense of humor I think I would really not ever be grounded. Healing from Extreme Trauma is so overwhelming that it got to a place where something had to give and I couldnt' find any good points about me or healing and that it was a complete nightmare. So as I became healthier and more aware, humor has played an invaluable role in my healing.

As far as laughing at the trauma, mental illness or whatever... that is unexceptable to me. Thank-you so much for posting it the way you did, I appreciate it TheByzantine!
Just one more thing I'd like to point out in my situation, is I feel like the people in this world and me are like water and oil, I just have a tough time
dealing with things. So instead of spacking the person by the bus, I find something, anything funny about the situation to take the pressure off.
That is what I meant and I think Byzantine and Perna put it out there well. I hope others will give us your thoughts...
ThaCrew

Humor is healing but is also very individual. What one finds funny, another may take offense to. (Sorry grammar experts; I have a dangling participle )
I have always had a very sarcastic humor, self deprecating, and dry that many don't get. I believe that may have saved my life. I laugh at he most inappropriate times as a release. Some may say it's socially incorrect humor. What ever it is, it has saved me many times. Humor does have a role in healing, but I think it's individual as far as grounding goes. Though the subject matter of the humor is individual, the act of laughing IS very grounding.

Crew, Byzantine and all.

[Crew]

Here is yet another Great Example of humor...

My nerve pain has been extremely intense and when it gets this bad I have to go put on some Enya and try to leave my body. I have central nerve damage due to abuse by others. Nothing will take it away. So you may be thinking wow, wonder what that is like, it's like a nerve that is exposed in your teeth when it hurts so bad. Well the humorous part was and still is that the nerve pain is in my Nose, yes I did say my nose and it hurts so bad and my eyes water. I am only going into this because it is important, so I have joked about my Nose all day and I have to ground because it reminds me of things that I was hurt with over and over etc...
So, people are asking me today why am I holding my nose...and I said because I have nerve pain in my Nose. The looks I got were priceless and just wished I had my camera to capture those looks.
So yes you do have a nerve ending in your NOSE! hahahahaha ouch!
thacrew

((((((((((((( ThaCrew )))))))))))))))