nightmares

less then a month ago my best friend died from suicide and i found her...every night when or if i go to sleep i relive the incidint in my dreams then i wake up with as flashback...i dont know what to do i cant make it all the way thru the dream but i wish i didnt dream.... i dont know what to do thank you for reading

~ Lucky 13

sweetie, you just keep talking with the support team you've mentioned you have. talk out what you feel in the moment even if that is just to say "I don't know what I'm feeling!"

letting out what is inside instead of sitting on it alone will help. sharing the pain inside will help. telling your truths will help.

perhaps asking your therapist about some handouts on PTSD that might better explain some of what you are experiencing? knowledge helped us tremendously when we were new to our dx's and didn't yet understand that we weren't the only one who felt as we did, or had flashbacks like we did, or had nightmares like we did, or was hypervigilant like we used to be all the time.............

just knowing that others experienced the same gave us great comfort. it meant that others had survived horrors and somehow they "got better".........in the sense that the symptoms diminished over time with lots of work in therapy or other such helpful modalities of healing.

there are some techniques others in this forum might be aware of ....like how to incorporate some lucid dreaming into your dreams........that is the ability to change your dreams in the middle of........you become an active participant in the dream.........we hope someone else will chime in if they know more.

tc Lucky_13 and glad you found this site. keep talking!

((((((((((((((((((Lucy 13)))))))))))))) What a terrible thing to go through. I am so sorry about your dreams. Maybe you could consider going to a therapist? They can help you work through many things. I hope you are able to get some restful sleep soon. Take care.

I personally feel as though the bad dreams will pass in time and will be replaced with better dreams once your mind and your body deal with the loss a little more.... like we talked about in support chat.

Take-Care & Hugs
LoVe,
Rhapsody -

Lucky_13..I am so very sorry..I can relate to the images..at about 12, my friend from next door we came home from school and found his step father dead from a very violent suicide, and then I caught my mom soon after trying to kill herself...just wanted you to know why I can relate with the images being stuck replaying in your head..your Therapist is going to help walk you thru those dark places..the images and nightmares are apart of the PTSD...

having soothing things around you before you go to bed may help when you wake up panicked...I go to sleep with a soothing CD playing, and keep a night light on so when I jump awake, I am not in the dark.

I am so sorry Lucky_13 that you are enduring this, no one should have to keep the images of a violent death in their head...know that your in my deepest thoughts..take care..be gentle with yourself...give yourself time, this is very recent acute traumatic injury you are suffering thru..the nightmares are a symptom of that trauma..

I can't say I ever witnessed what you did but I do know what it is like to live through nights of misery. I don't even remember what I was dreaming but I was told I would scream during the night. My family would wake up to see what was going on and I would be sound asleep. I had been dealing with a tremendous amount of stress and it was affecting my sleep. I was given a drug that helped me sleep better. I took it for about 10 days and then I only took it when I had alot of stress to deal with. It was very addicting so they monitored me closely when I was on it. I now sleep pretty soundly, however, there are still nights I fight sleep but I am learning it isn't fatal. It will get better in time.

Sorry you are going through all this at such a young age. I didn't actually see my brother kill himself, but I got a mental image of what he did. That haunted me for such a long time. I found through therapy, journaling, and speaking with those close to me, eventually the nightmares past.

It takes time. Grief in itself takes time to heal from. You are at a tender age as it is, and lots of stuff floats around in our heads at that age. Our minds do have a tendency to replay things...try jornaling before you go to bed, write any feelings out you have-anything, doesn't have to be perfect...just write, it's for your eyes only. Then as suggested maybe listen to some music you find calming, or that puts your mind at ease.

Another thing you might try is talking with a school counselor, even if this didn't happen during school time, even if your friend wasn't a member of your school. They can help you find some direction, if you aren't already in therapy.

One other thing. I know after my brother died, one of the things I feel that helped me personally, was when these intrusive thoughts wandered into my mind (sleeping or not) I would tell myself he's finally at peace. He didn't have to suffer any more. Why he chose to do that, I don't really know, but it must have been in a great moment of despair. Kind of seeing it that way, helped me let go of those images that would replay all the time in my head. And eventually, I could fall asleep without waking in a startled screaming or crying state.

Just know you are not alone hun!!!, and that you don't have to walk this one alone. Much love in prayers, Lisa.

This has to be one of the saddest things I have ever heard. I am so sorry L13

I agree that you need to talk also write all you can and anything to get it out

I'm sorry to hear you experienced this Try telling yourself before falling asleep that you want to tell your friend something... and then maybe you will tell in the dream.... and that might help you release the memory?