[The.Hannahator]

A year ago I was involved in a car accident which killed my fiancé. 3 months ago I went to a phycologist for an analysis and within 10 minutes was diagnosed with PTSD and put on a therapy plan. I was reassured that nightmares will soon go away and my social life will go back to normal.
My nightmares are a while different story, but right now I'm concerned about the social issue. A few days ago a family friend went to give me a hug and I panicked and pushed her away; later going to her and apologizing, and trying to explain how being touched triggers memories and anxiety attacks. She just laughed. Then this morning my mother woke up and looked into my room to see me already awake (common issue). Then when she asked if I'm having a rough day and I nodded, she asked "May I hug you?" I quickly said no and could feel my entire body tense. She then went and got ready, and I finished getting dressed. We both walked into the kitchen and she said "May I hug you now?" Expecting time to prepare myself for touch to help. "Not today." I could tell she had been crying, her love language is touch so I can see where this would bother her.
My question is, Is this normal? Even a hand on my shoulder freaks me out. I've actually punched some people because they touched my without warning. What are some ways to cope that'll allow people to touch me without getting hurt or send me into a flashback?
Thanks in advance!

[Skeezyks]

Hello The.Hannahator: I'm sorry for your loss. I don't know as I have any useful suggestions for you here. I dislike being touched as well. But I don't have the reaction to it you do. So I'll leave it to other members to hopefully offer some useful suggestions.

I see this is your first post here on PC though. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[MtnTime2896]

A common symptom of PTSD is called hypervigilance.

Hypervigilance is an enhanced state of sensory sensitivity accompanied by an exaggerated intensity of behaviors whose purpose is to detect threats. Hypervigilance is also accompanied by a state of increased anxiety which can cause exhaustion.

Sensitivity to touch could very well be your hypervigilance. I'm not a doctor, so I can't say that this is the cause, but it could be. I've had to work on mine, but I had gotten the same way.

Welcome to PC, though I'm sorry for your loss. Hopefully this site will help offer support, understanding and help you to feel less alone.

[Unrigged64072835]

I don't have any advice to give you, but I'm sorry for your loss.