new year, same stuff

I don't know what has got me so antsy, but i am moving through my house as if it were a battlefield or a haunted graveyard - all the shadows are making me nervous, and seeing the furnature moved around to accomodate the crhistmas tree makes me jump - i keep thinking the items are people. I've jumped at every sound from the wind howling to papers falling. Going down into the basement was like going into the haunted mansion. It takes a lot of energy to be this on edge - maybe my 4 hours of sleep is helping contribute to this cause. Ahhhh dog bark = me jump. I keep telling myself, "it's jan 1, a new year, a new day, almost my birthday, find joy, i can feel safe...." *sound*, jump. I am trying to keep myself in the present and grounded by attempting to get myself on task; "if i were living a balnaced life, what is one step i can take?" I did laundry (basement), straightened the livingroom, made soup last night - feeling so domestic, this is rare - thought about cleaning the bathroom or bedroom - no, bedroom needs a week, not a day. What else can i do to keep me in balance rather than in fear of some unknown, probably unexistant thing....? think think think
Kiya

Kiya, the neat thing is it isn't like last year, cuz you have ppl here at pc to help you through the rough spots
xoxoxoxoxo
Angie

Points to you on that one! (((((((thanks)))))))))))