Dealing with triggers

I live in an apartment complex and while browsing around online I heard outside a woman's voice say "I don't want to get hit." and popping noises. The voice wasn't necessarily upset but the content and the sounds concerned me so I looked out the window to check.

A group of adults were playing outside, around the building, with black toy guns that look just like pistols. They sounded like they were having fun although one woman who was participating said that things were hurting.

Yikes. I started feeling horrible and scared. I determined that there was no emergency so my next job was to take good care of myself. I closed all my blinds right away to screen out the sight and prevent myself from watching hypervigilantly. I turned on a fan to mask the sounds.

A friend called and I told him what was going on, in the process I started crying. We came up with some good ideas, including for me to find fun distractions.

I've noticed that I'm still sorta triggery, dealing with frustrating moderation on another board makes me more upset, so I've stopped that for the day. I'm going to take a hot bath, eat something, and focus on a fun book.

I'm safe and I do have the option of asking our manager to have the adults take it elsewhere. I'm okay.

(((((CedarS)))))

*yay for taking care of yourself *
hoping things continue to calm down for you!
Kiya

I'm a lot less jumpy now - sleep and food and my neighbors settling down helped lots.

am sorry that this upset you...

I've only recently started therapy again. And whilst this is a good thing, I'm also intensely aware of how vulnerable this makes me.

My memory plays tricks on me, but I'm sure it was my second session when I lost it - the whole nine yards. All the way.

I can't even recall the words that were being spoken at the time, but suddenly only a part of me was sitting in my therapist's office. The rest of me was 'somewhere', very close to the time and place that I was assaulted.

I tried desperately to pull back, to stop myself heading down that slippery slide. It didn't work. Panic, tears, a sense of loss. Incredible sadness. Fear. Terror. And the sense that he was still nearby.

My therapist waited a little until I came back to her... but I was a mess for the rest of the session.

She told me a few things that help - to remind myself to stop. That those things are in the past. That right here and now I'm safe. That its over.

They do help, sort of. But I'm yet to get any sort of proper handle on my PTSD episodes.

Hugs to you!

I think one of the hardest, and first, things to do in the line of triggers and self care with PTSD is to realize you ARE being triggered, or have been!

Even once you do realize, it is still another thing to begin to think about countering it, or taking care of yourself.

It's a long process for some. It's the disorder though, not you, that prevents faster learning.