[collegefriend]

i haven't been diagnosed or anything but i thought that this would be the best place to post. as some of you might remember my best guy friend tried to kill himself over the summer. he sent me a text message saying he was sorry and that he loved all of us. my friend and i were the ones who found him. lately it has all been coming back in my dreams at night. i see everything so well and i live through the whole things everynight. somtimes in slow motions and sometimes it speeds up. i see everything: where the exact placement of his clothes were, where i put my leftover food, what song was on the tv everything!! at first i thought of it as nothing but it happened every night for like 2 weeks. i tried talking to my friend about it (the one who was there as well) and she 'seemed' like she understood and yeah she prolly did to some extend but i have been feeling so alone, haveing no one to love me.
all this has gone for now, but if i watch a movie and it has suicide in it, or someone around my age is sick or get hurt pieces come back and i think of him.
i talked to him a couple of weeks ago and he had started a new job and because of this new job it was creating major amounts of stress so he started cutting again. i asked him about when he started and it was around the same time that i was having all the dreams/nightmares. is this normal?? when something goes wrong with him am i somehow going to know?? or is it because i am so worried about him??? i don't know..... its confusing... i cried so hard when he told me that he was cutting again what if it happens all over again?? well thats all for now, thanks for listening!

[SweetCrusader]

If you're in college, your school should have a counseling center, and it should be free. Have you looked into that?

This was a very traumatic experience for you and it sounds to me like you really need some help processing it.

Best of luck to you. Feel free to post for support anytime.

Angela