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#1
May 10, 2009, 07:15 AM
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I have T on Tuesday and I am overly anxious about it - triggery - been stupid - done stupid things - so not coming back till after T on Tues.
Didnt want you to think I dont care about you all - I do - I hope everything is ok - I will be back after T - but cant stay here till then - sorry take care everyone - I will be thinking of you all and wishing you well - keep your fingers crossed for me for last session wiht this T - Im worried she will trigger me..... pointless worrying about this until it happens - but im triggery... sorry - take care P7 
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts  its how many times you get back up!   (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#2
May 10, 2009, 07:22 AM
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good luck, sweetie, i will keep you safe in my thoughts until then and look forward to your return
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 phoenix7
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#3
May 10, 2009, 07:26 AM
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 biggest hug in the world to you phoenix.....
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| phoenix7
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#4
May 10, 2009, 07:41 AM
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all 3 of the 3velniai group cross their fingers
waiting for you to come back and tell how it went
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I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead I lift my lids and all is born again I think I made you up inside my head |
| phoenix7
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#5
May 10, 2009, 08:28 AM
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Hope Tuesday gets here quickly for you....
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Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail... 
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| phoenix7
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#6
May 10, 2009, 08:36 AM
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((((((((P7))))))))))))
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LLT |
| phoenix7
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#7
May 10, 2009, 09:00 AM
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Good luck phoenix! I will be thinking of you too! ((((P7))))
Xtree
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"People do not fail, they just stop trying" |
| phoenix7
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#8
May 10, 2009, 10:24 AM
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Phoenix,
I know this is going to be a very difficult one for you. I really hope your T is very supportive and has a good plan for you. Sending you big Hugs..
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Hangingon When you feel your nearing the end of your rope tie a knot and hang on !!! |
| phoenix7
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#9
May 10, 2009, 06:08 PM
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(((((((((((((((((((((((((P7)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
to you!I hope you might just check in on this one thread so we can support you. You are so supportive to everyone here, and it is okay for you to get some support as well, you know.... I hope your appointment goes well. Be gentle with you.
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| phoenix7
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#10
May 10, 2009, 07:09 PM
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sneaks in..... grabs hugs.... says....
Thankyou everyone sneaks out again..... 
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#11
May 11, 2009, 06:22 AM
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Dear P7,
just now seeing your post. Hope T's waiting room is big enough to hold all of us, because we will be with you. take this hug too!! PS I will give your blanket back for now
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| phoenix7
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#12
May 11, 2009, 07:42 AM
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sneaks in .....
gets big bag and puts everyone in it ..... puts milk and cookies in bag so no-one is hungry.... sneaks them into T's office..... will sneak them back afterwards and no-one will be any the wiser... leaves message ... Thankyou everyone - hoping you are all safe sneaks out..... cuddles up in blanket and goes to sleep - T tomorrow.
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#13
May 11, 2009, 08:05 AM
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Good Luck tomorrow
Hope it goes well
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If giving in is pointless, then get out of bed or this might be the end. |
| phoenix7
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#14
May 11, 2009, 08:13 AM
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good luck sweetie
.
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| phoenix7
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#15
May 11, 2009, 11:33 AM
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(((Sneaky hug)))
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Now if thou would'st When all have given him o'er From death to life Thou might'st him yet recover -- Michael Drayton 1562 - 1631 |
| phoenix7
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#16
May 11, 2009, 01:07 PM
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Quote:
phoenix!!! you are such a legend! despite your anxiety you still manage to cheer US up  love u 2 bits hurry up & get back on let us know howit went..... |
| phoenix7
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#17
May 11, 2009, 02:51 PM
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I hope you're okay
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"Unipolar is boring! Go Bipolar!"  Amazonmom is not putting up with bad behavior any more. |
| phoenix7
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#18
May 11, 2009, 02:57 PM
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| phoenix7
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#19
May 11, 2009, 03:36 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((P7))))))))))))))))))))))
Thinking of you and sending you strength to hold on.....
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#20
May 11, 2009, 08:19 PM
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My warm thoughts are with you for a good session tomorrow!
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| phoenix7
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#21
May 11, 2009, 10:01 PM
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you guys and gals are the best! just got back from T - have to get changed and go straight to work - late
 will post more later - but T GAVE ME A HUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Im ok - will post later - have to go - thankyou all
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
| darkrunner
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#22
May 11, 2009, 10:31 PM
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Glad you had a better t session
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| phoenix7
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#23
May 12, 2009, 06:32 AM
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Quote:
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#24
May 12, 2009, 08:15 AM
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ok I went in all adult - my coolest calmest face on -
we did EMDR and suddenly I told her I felt really scared - she put her hand on my hand and then we continued EMDR - then I felt really sad...and I said I dont want you to go....  I understand why you are going - but I dont want you to go (hmmm adult left child taken over!  ) We sat and talked about that for a while and I felt better - I wasnt going to say it ... I was going to be all adult about it - but I couldnt and Im glad I mentioned it .... then we worked on the storm of emotions I always feel is just waitning to knock me off my feet and destroy me - and the image I have in my head of a child out in the storm being pulled towards it - by the time we had finished - in my mind the little girl was able to get away and go into a house and be safe and the storm died down.. then we dealt with how I felt responsible for my mum and dads deaths (different years) because I was half a world away at the time and felt I should have been able to save them - she told me remember you are NOT superman I said - show me a phone booth and i'll show you!!! and we both laughed!!!! as I was leaving she got a phone call to ring someone urgently SO i gave her her present but didnt get to see her open it i had bought T a card that says, If you hold onto the handle she siad, its easier to maintain the illusion of control. But it's more fun if you just let the wind carry you then I wrote - thankyou for helping me realise I dont have to be in control ALL the time acouple of months ago we had done some visualisation - we planted an apple tree in a place that used to make me sad to make it a happy place - I saw some "Apple Tree Tea" so I have bought her some to remind her of the tree we planted wrote on it - "this is from the tree we planted together" and I left a small glass bead with Trust on it in the bag - the bag had "making a difference on it " and had a picture of an apple tree on it I wish I could have seen her open it ... as I was leaving I said can I ask you if I can do something innappropriate and before I could ask for a hug - she gave me a BIG hug and said "make me proud" I would never in all the universe have thought I would have asked for a hug (dont like being touched)so that was big enough but to get one without asking ....WOW!It felt like she cared about me - and Im not used to that ... not used to thining I am worth caring about ..... oh and I stoped off at a charity shop and brought a preloved bear - looked like it needed a hug and I needed a cuddly (yes I know - at my age) SO it went well - dont know who new T wil be - will fnd out when I make my appt in 2 weeks .... phew... very tired - sorry for long post - thankyou all for your support - it really made a difference and meant/means a lot to me. Sittingatwatersedge - I'm sending you blanket back in the morning - I still need it tonight if thats ok - thankyou and I dont know who ate all the cookies but it wasnt me ok! (wipes cookie crumbs from front of shirt! finishes off milk and sneaks out holding onto blanket and teddy bear !)
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#25
May 12, 2009, 08:39 AM
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wow!, that's amazing, so glad it went well, you were really brave.....you should be
really proud of yourself!, not surprised you feel tired, that was so emotional!!, i was ok till i got to the bit "make me proud"  ...... good tears, happy ones!, of course she cares about you, that will never change. Big monster hug comin over to u phoenix, xxxx
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| phoenix7
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