Subject: Where was I?

As I drove home today from T I had an unsettled feeling--a little anxious, a little angry, a little dissatisfied until tears were streaming down my face--I felt like something had been taken away from me and I realized it was my experience. T imposed his opinion about something I had experienced. He didn't give me room to own my own experience, to meander through the maze I needed to navigate in order to arrive at my own understanding. I felt usurped. I think the feeling is familiar and one which I rail against vigorously. It's an old old feeling. The value of the exchange lies in the transference/countertransference and then my willingness or ability to address this with him which I will. Stay tuned.

I hate driving a way from an appointment and feeling dissatsifed. My T usually doesn't impose her opinion on me but sometimes things just don't click and I just feel unheard.

I'm sure you will work your way through the process and find the treasure hiddened in this disconnect.

How wise of you to recognize this, Miss C You are SO right....

I'm sorry you left your session feeling unheard, but I am so proud of you for turning it around and making it a moment of growth.

It's always so hard when things like this happen, on days like this I try to remind myself that T's are ppl too, and they sometimes do the wrong thing. I'm glad you are going to talk about this next time and I really hope you will tell us how it went

Hey guys,

Thanks for the feedback. I didn't wait till next time. I called from the car! LOL

We spoke briefly last night and I let him know how I felt. I realized while speaking with him that one of the issues is steeped in my "stuff." He apologized, said he was sorry he "missed" me. I said we would talk more at next appt. and that was it! Who am I? An adult? eeeegads

I'm glad you called! When I used to leave my T, sometimes I'd cry as soon as I got to my car. I'd drive around the corner and then call her! Usually that phone call helped.

What do you mean by "who am I? An adult?"

You know reading this, I was feeling my own feelings of anger just imagining having someone insert their "take" on something and not letting me get to my own "take", and I think this has happened between me and T in some form, perhaps not exactly like you describe here. when I next raised this issued, T said something like, its ok to not always get "it" right, and in her sometimes getting it "wrong", it gives me more chance to get it "right" for myself. Hope this makes sense.

I so TOTALLY get that, MissC! Been there before and getting more frequent as time passes!

Rainbow,

What I meant was that I was surprised at how I handled this whole situation, quite matter of factly, without obsessing over whether he would agree or not. I just called, stated what I needed to and ended the conversation. Boom, done....

More often than not I think I feel very small when I have to defend myself........this time I didn't.