this could be the end

Oct 14, 2009, 03:38 PM

((((((((((((tree))))))))))))

i'm so glad you've decided to go see t tomorrow. you are one strong woman. don't forget to let him know you'll be there so he doesn't decide to step out for a coffee or something.

i bet the reason you haven't heard back from him is because he's been really trying to figure out what happened too and how best to rectify it. i'm sure he doesn't want to say anything that will make things worse so is really thinking about it all. he cares about you so much and sure didn't mean to act like a doofus. he cares tree--don't ever doubt that!

jexa · Oct 14, 2009, 03:51 PM

((((tree))))

PLEASE let us know how it goes tomorrow!!! You are doing such a difficult thing.

Indie'sOK · Oct 14, 2009, 04:12 PM

((((Tree)))) You are so strong, you know?

I'm glad you decided to go. I hope it goes well!

Sannah · Oct 14, 2009, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by treehouse

It will probably be the hardest thing I've ever done, but I'm going to go to my session tomorrow. I may as well go and sit there and try to figure out what on earth happened.

it just hurts so much and it's so scary and like all of my therapy fears coming true. i cant' believe i'm going

If you are in pain and scared there is definitely something here to work through and it will really be worth it I think..........

velcro003 · Oct 14, 2009, 05:14 PM

yay tree!! i'm so proud of you. you are SO BRAVE. I can't wait to hear all about it, and hopefully with a happy ending.

chaotic13 · Oct 14, 2009, 06:50 PM

Tree,
All I can say is when I found myself returning to T after a major rupture with my T it was one of the hardest things I did. Mainly because I was going totally for ME. To give myself closure and not for anyone else.

Successfully facing this rupture was a very powerful experience and help the therapeutic relationship.

googley · Oct 14, 2009, 07:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by treehouse

I do hear what you all are saying.

T always calls me after our appointments to leave a message. He screwed up in session yesterday. I did call and leave a message, so I know he is very clear on what happened, at least from my end. He did not call me to leave a message, like he ALWAYS DOES. I don't know if he's angry, or punishing me, or has dropped off the earth, or what. He is obviously not interested in connecting.

I don't want it to end this way. I wish I could have seen this coming, and I would have started the termination process, and everything would have ended the "right" way. I can't imagine walking in there tomorrow.

This is kind of like a big nightmare.

((((((((Tree))))))))

Did you ask him to call you back when you left your message? IF you didn't, since you called first, he might think that you don't want to talk to him directly because you are angry. And so to respect your space and not intrude if you didn't ask, he could believe he is helping. As you reminded me last week when I was angry at my Pdoc for not calling me back after I left a message, he may not realize you want him to call if you didn't actually say so. (That was my problem last week.)

googley · Oct 14, 2009, 07:12 PM

Hi again Tree,
So I finished reading all the posts to this point now, so I'm up to date unlike my last post where I was not yet.

I am so glad to hear that you are going to see T tomorrow!!!! Please let us know how it goes. I have faith in you. You are so strong.

Oct 14, 2009, 08:51 PM

Tree

I hope tomorrow is very healing for you, whatever that looks like.

fallenangel337 · Oct 14, 2009, 09:17 PM

((((((((tree))))))))

I'm really glad to hear that you're going tomorrow! I hope for the best for you!

Oct 14, 2009, 11:04 PM

Little tree,

Everyone has said so much of what I wanted to say, so I will just give you a little hug

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((tree))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

sunrise · Oct 14, 2009, 11:11 PM

((((((((((treehouse))))))))))

Good luck tomorrow, tree.

I'm thinking of you.

Kiya · Oct 15, 2009, 02:46 AM

I'm just catching up, and read everything @_@ omg! I do hope things work out! Maybe he was PMSing!

i'm out here if you want to PM!!!
((((((((((((Tree!)))))))))))

Brightheart · Oct 15, 2009, 05:20 AM

Best of luck in your session, Treehouse.

Oct 15, 2009, 05:56 AM

I hope I can do this

My session is in a couple of hours (I think, I'm so freaked out that I'm all confused about time. i see him at 9 and it's 6:53...so that is just over 2 hours, i think). My tummy is all in knots and i am shaking!!

I hope I don't go and just dissociate and leave

i don't know if i will be able to stay present and feel like this at the same time.

i don't want to, but maybe i will write some things down so if i DO dissociate, he'll still have the info. or maybe i will leave a message and tell him i really want to try to stay present and ask him to help me do that. because i KNOW i want to stay present now, but when i get there i bet i won't feel so strong.

ack, i am so confused about the time. i think i will go shower so i am ready to go in case i am wrong about the time

this just TOTALLY SUCKS. i wish it wasn't happening. i SO wish that.

Oct 15, 2009, 06:10 AM

You can do this...keep breathing...and yes, a few notes seems like a good idea to help keep you focussed, or to convey things you can't say at some point...
Thinking of you...

sittingatwatersedge · Oct 15, 2009, 06:23 AM

Treehouse

Will be going with you today. take care, dear Tree.

jacq10 · Oct 15, 2009, 07:37 AM

(((((((((((((Treehouse)))))))))))))

I know that anxious-sick feeling all too well, and I hope that you were able to get through it ok.

Please let us know how the session goes... you've got lots of people supporting you here!

Jacq

velcro003 · Oct 15, 2009, 08:40 AM

I'm thinking of you tree!! Your session is almost over and I hope it went ok.

Kiya · Oct 15, 2009, 01:14 PM

How are you? it's been 4 hours now... are you present? ok? stable? try to get grounded and centered. breathe. have tea. talk to us.

velcro003 · Oct 15, 2009, 01:23 PM

(Read the "I did it!" Thread)

noobinberg · Oct 15, 2009, 01:28 PM

You need therapy for your therapy...LOL! Please know that I'm not laughing at your situation but, what you said was really funny. I've often found myself in your situation but, just know that everyone is human and they make mistakes. I think you should send that email. If nothing else you are not keeping your feelings inside. I don't know anything about you specific situation. You know what's best for you.

Menu

this could be the end

My Support Forums