[polarsmom]

I have been having a difficult time the last few days. Somehow managed to end up feeling depressed again. I was doing good for a short time. And I hate that I've somehow managed to let that frickin demon back in my head! I'm so sick of it. Just tired of being overwhelmed by this.

I have a session this afternoon and I don't want to go. I don't want to cry over what appears like nothing. I just want to stay home. I was in much better spirits the last couple sessions. I didn't feel so anxious, and unhappy. I don't know who flipped the damn switch to turn off the happy!

I know I can get out of this funk. Again. But these last few days I just can't seem to. Can't find a reason to. In my real life I feel like I don't have a reason to be a happy person.

How or where do I find the strength, the desire to get better when I feel like this?

[sittingatwatersedge]

((((((((( polarsmom )))))))))))))

Odds are that your T has the key to this. Why don;t you give it a try?

I will meet you back here later - I am in exactly this spot myself and have appt tomorrow. I'll go with you, if you go with me. deal?

It's at times like this that we need to go to our sessions the most. Hope you feel better soon.

[polarsmom]

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

((((((((( polarsmom )))))))))))))

Odds are that your T has the key to this. Why don;t you give it a try?

I will meet you back here later - I am in exactly this spot myself and have appt tomorrow. I'll go with you, if you go with me. deal?

Your reply touched me so much it made me cry. Thank you for the kind words.

You've got yourself a deal. I'm going to keep my appointment rather than pretend I can't make it and try to reschedule (I'm lucky he's totally fine with that stuff). Since I'm keeping the appointment I should get myself ready to go. Going to make sure that I put on my waterproof mascara this time.

I'll check in later with an update. I think I need to call my psychologist too. I don't think this medication I'm on is working for me. I am going to talk to T about it too. Not sure if it's my new sense of 'clarity' that has brought things to the surface or if it's the removal of Lexapro. I'm so hating this. I just want to feel normal again.

polarsmom So sorry you are having a difficult time right now. I'm very glad that you are keeping your appointment with T - farmergirl is right, this is when we most need to see T.

Originally Posted by polarsmom

Since I'm keeping the appointment I should get myself ready to go. Going to make sure that I put on my waterproof mascara this time.

Ever since I started crying on a semi-regular basis in therapy, I always wear my waterproof mascara on therapy days now!

Hope you have a good session!!

[polarsmom]

Had a good session with T. I cried on and off pretty much the entire time. Got some stuff out in the open for us to continue dealing with. It ended up running really long. I think by a good half hour. I relaxed, and wasn't being all emotional anymore. I asked a few personal questions and then we just started talking about misc. stuff. I love when we do that. It makes the transition from therapy to the real world easier. Plus I don't feel so drained after an emotional session.

[zooropa]

I'm glad you had a good session & were able to cry & get some things out in the open for future discussion. It's great that your T is willing to let your session run over if that's what you need!!

So glad you had a good emotional session, polarsmom! Very cool that your T ran over for you.

Take care of yourself!

[moonrise]

I'm glad your session went well. Sometimes I've found that the less I want to go to a session, the more I get out of it in the end.

I hope your session went well. I wish I had a happy switch to turn on, that would be great! I hate the depression demon. I still fear it when I am down just a couple of days, but you know what? That is normal. If it goes longer than you should be more concerned.
I stopped wearing makeup all together after my 2nd T. He taught me how to cry and bet there is still makeup stains from me on the chair. lol

[polarsmom]

Originally Posted by sittingatwatersedge

((((((((( polarsmom )))))))))))))

Odds are that your T has the key to this. Why don;t you give it a try?

I will meet you back here later - I am in exactly this spot myself and have appt tomorrow. I'll go with you, if you go with me. deal?

So, what time should I be ready to go??